To think the tone of these texts was a bit threatening?

[thedaisymeadow]

I was signed off work before the summer holidays with an injury rather than an illness. I'm starting back on a phased return soon.

I'm still in pain when I sit down for long periods and moving is actually the best thing for me.

So this morning dp and I plus two of our friends (a couple) and their children went to a beautiful country park. I took a couple of photos and uploaded them to facebook.

At midnight last night my phone went and I was still half asleep but looked at it in case it was an emergency. It was an ex-colleague from work telling me 'I don't think you should be doing that' (uploading photos.)

Then, five more texts came through in about a minute saying things like 'do you understand? You must not post on Facebook when signed off'

She then sent me one saying she could tell I was reading them. I then relied and said she'd woken me up.

Would you feel a bit weird about it?

ignore the messages.

I suspect she was thinking that if she warned you straight away, ie at midnight, you could take the pictures down and no one else would see them.

It helps you to walk, but you must know that some people think: walking = completely well.

It sounds to me that this person was trying to do you a favour. Hopefully she is wrong, if you haven't taken the pictures down.

All these "delete her," "she's a dick," "what a cow" messages - Why can't people give others the benefit of the doubt? You know, that thing you are assuming the OP will be given when people see her FB posts.

I was signed off sick when I was undergoing cancer treatment pseudonym - would you suggest that I didn't post anything on Facebook?

I don't think I am really balloon as I only have about 100 people on my FB lists and mostly people have been lovely about my injury. I was fortunate in a sense as there was no doubt that I was in a lot of pain and was visibly limping, and was obviously trying really hard to carry on until I just couldn't.

We went to the park in the morning and the texts came through 12 hours later.

Am probably being grumpy but it was pretty weird having a flurry of texts through at that late hour!

My dh has an injury. It feels as though he has been signed off for ever.
There is no way that he can do his physical manual job at the moment. He would happily do another role until recovered but occupational health have said there's nothing suitable.
Does this mean he shouldn't enjoy the time he is at home?
Unless your facebook page is full of you doing similar things that work would expect yanbu.

I'd raise a grievance

She clearly needs telling to stop being a wanker

They will tell her that, and she will be warned

Maybe it was well meant but she was being very pushy about it. Some people put illness/injury in a little box and you must be laid up at home in bed, being a miserable martyr. But it's more complex than that... Mental health issues benefit from being outside doing things. Cancer patients have times in the day they feel well enough to get on with things between appointments but couldn't do a day at work. Your injury needs exercise! Even if anyone did raise an issue, you're covered with doctors notes etc.. They could even google your injury and see what helps it.

She sounds weird. Ignore her or say 'thank you for your concern but I'm ok thanks'.

I work in HR for a large company and have managed plenty of long term sickness cases in the past. I have to say, I wouldn't be fussed about seeing Facebook pictures of you, granted if you were clearly out on the piss when you have told us you have S&D or playing league football when apparently you have a bad back then thats different.

Screenshot the texts and show them to your boss/HR. Completely inappropriate to message you like that. Some people think off sick = faking and always will, there's nothing you can do about it.

I stand by my comment. Social media and work do not mix. Do not friend people in your private life who you work with. Keep the two things separate. Problem solved.

Perhaps I am an old fuddy-duddy. But I just think your private life should be kept private. Otherwise it is just inviting trouble.

I'd give her the benefit of the doubt but turn it back on her "Don't worry, boss knows exactly what's going on with my recovery. I'm not banned from FB LOL/emoji. It seemed like you were getting really quite stressed around midnight, is everything OK?"

Being a bit annoying and interfering yes, I don't think it was threatening though. She probably said you culd see the messages cos she was annoyed, I really don't think it'd be classed as threatening behaviour

I agree with you pseudonym re fb and posting for most sick leave. However someone going through chem and radio just a quick message to update people prevents 100s phone calls which when you going through it is very tried ing. I have a friend who off sick with depression and really she shouldnt be posting on fb as when shes well she be upset about whats she s posted. Her mum had a quiet word in this case. Fb can be amazing supportive if you have long term sickness.

Don't post pictures of your self on social media when your off sick! Your supposed to be sad and misrable.

Honestly - this could and can go against you. I know at least three people that have been investigated or dismissed because of this.

Employees and employers don't like to see other people enjoying them selfs when not in work and off sick and claiming sick pay.

i think the messages were a bit weird but it just goes to show folks mentality over it. I'd take the pics down

Remove anyone related to work on your FB and ensure your privacy settings are set as private as they can me.

Work and FB don't mix.

I would reply to her and say "thanks for your concern, but actually keeping moving and doing gentle exercise is much less painful for me than sitting still, and this is what the Dr has recommended. So I don't think I have done anything wrong by going for a walk. I'm on sick leave, not under house arrest!"

Unless you had problems with her when working together I would think she had your best interests at heart. Otoh your pics didn't show you were bungee jumping so she was a bit OTT contacting you at that hour.

Hi

I'm not replying to her - I really did feel the tone of the messages was threatening and inappropriate. I understand some of you may have had issues with work and Facebook but I haven't and no one expects be to be miserable. It was a hobble round a park not a skydive

Caption your pictures with something like "Getting some fresh air and exercising as advised by my doctor" to shut down the cat's bum face.

Still think she was plastered....

I think she was trying to be helpful. I didn't read them as threatening at all.
I know two former colleagues who were off because of illness and injury and the organisation (although ostensibly caring and considerate) was extremely unhappy when the colleagues were visibly socialising. In both cases, their illnesses/injuries didn't bar them from being out but it did raise questions in the HR department and with senior management about whether they could have returned to work sooner.
She may be more aware of the attitude of your employer than you are.

I think you should reply somehow to her. An e-trail, showing you asked her to calm down and leave you alone might be handy later if she tries to escalate.

If only to tell her you've seen her messages, thanks for her concern but employers have no problems with your rehab process, please don't send me loads of texts at midnight.

I'm with Elspeth. Late night vino + Facebook + texting = wankerish behaviour.

I wonder how she's feeling this morning. Just ignore her.

We had an incident at work where someone was signed off by the doctors after an injury then tagged and photographs in the pub, screen shot and sent to hr by colleagues. Maybe this colleague is trying to warn you? So you don't get in trouble?

Regarding the 'I know you've seen these' comment, get the Facebook Unseen app or similar. It stops the messenger showing if something's been read or not. Also block her, obviously!