I've had enough of my kids...

[LostTiredSad]

I'm so tired I feel like crying. I try to think if it's just our family that is like this but I'll list out things they've done today and how I'm now at breaking point:

Dd1 (8) spilt Cheerios all over the kitchen floor and left it there for me to clear up. Didn't think that she should brush it up.

Ds (4) constantly hitting his little sister (2) and then running away or taking her things and holding them up high whilst she screams. Or crying for no apparent reason.

Dd2 threw a small toy into the toilet.

In between all of this, they are constantly doing things to make a mess in the house. I can't follow them around the house all the time, but the minute I'm doing something, there'll be paper all over the floor or today, ear buds all out of the pot and everywhere. They scream and make horrible animal type noises all the time. The moment I take them out ds will find something to cry or moan about. We haven't been to the park in 4 weeks because last time dd2 took out my cards from my purse and threw them under a tree which I had to go back and find. The time before that ds had a cry and moan because he had sand in his fucking shoes. He will ALWAYS find something to cry about.

I feel like we're a bunch of animals fresh out of the jungle. It's been like this all summer. I constantly shout. I don't want to talk to them. I don't want to be nice to them. I'm always angry, and even they know this. I remember when I used to talk to them nicely but they have never listened to me. I feel like a dog barking all the time. I need to change.

Just want to say, those people who complain the holidays are too short probably haven't been at home with all their kids 24/7 for 6 weeks (as they will have been working and the children will have been at holiday/sports club/grandmas) and probably have enough money to go out and do loads of brill activities when they are with them, so the kids are out of the house and not causing chaos, plus a two week holiday in the middle of it. The holidays soon race by for the fortunate!

I really dislike the term 'making memories' it just makes people feel stressed about always needing to be perfect lest they ruin their kids childhood because they've been angry or not looked interested enough in one of their scribbles a couple of times.

Yorkie I think you mean vacuum, but vaccines are quite an idea given the health hazard that some teens' rooms are...

Just want to say, those people who complain the holidays are too short probably haven't been at home with all their kids 24/7 for 6 weeks (as they will have been working and the children will have been at holiday/sports club/grandmas

I completely agree...I have no one to help with my dc in the holidays so it's literally me and them 24/7 for 7 weeks! I find it harder than when I was home all day with them when they were babies and toddlers...at least then they didn't talk back to me or need constant expensive entertainment!

Absolutely agree with the above. Six weeks 24/7 is bloody hard going. Constant mess, demands, squabbling, whining, more bickering, tantrums, cries of I'm bored. It has just about finished me off.
Mine are 9 6 and 3 and they are exactly as you describe in your original post OP. I honestly thought it was just my kids as on Facebook everyone else is having a fantastic summer with happy smiley childen. It feels relentless. It is relentless.

The older two have gone back to school today so I should be getting the house back to normal. However I'm so exhausted I'm just sat drinking tea and MN ing

Had a brilliant morning. Children were compliant and got dressed without problems. It's true whoever upthread said that children soak in emotions. Because I was upbeat and happy this morning, the children were too. Apart from the 2 year old who refused to sit down and eat breakfast and then splashed in every puddle on the way to school and then wouldn't walk with me on the way back. I did get angry at her as she wasn't walking with me on a busy road and was jumping off people's driveways. Then she laid down on the wet ground and bawled because I held her by the arm to stop her running upto someone's door. I don't know. She is such a terror.

I'm glad there's loads of you happy your children are back at school. I've read all your comments, thank you for taking the time to reply. It's nice hearing others are in the same position, as fb is all about sadness and tears that the kids are back at school.

And I know what you mean about having loads of money and being able to treat kids and also about not having any help. I don't have anyone to leave mine with, so it's relentless. The other I was thinking, I've been changing nappies not stop since January 2012. I've really just had enough with the baby/toddler/small child stage now!

Have a look at positive discipline. It saved me and saves us on a regular basis.

i feel exactly the same at least 3 times a week! and yes, i am relieved school has started again! so don't feel rubbish. sometimes we are expected to do superhuman things and nobody seems to notice...

the only advice i'd give is that you need to be more disciplined with them. did you punish the 8 yr old for not cleaning up her mess? it sounds like you're dealing with repeated bad behaviour and that is exhausting. while it's exhausting to set up a new discipline regime it will save work in the long run. my mum had 4 kids and was pretty disciplined with us because it was the only way to a) keep control and avoid possibly dangerous situations b) they can learn that they are part of a family and a household and they have to start pulling their weight. You are not the only person who should be doing all the domestic labour. even little kids can learn to tidy up their toys. older ones can put their dirty laundry in the basket, etc.

all of your kids are old enough to understand naughty behaviour and consequences. you deserve more respect and the only way you're going to get it is if you demand it. once they get over the initial shock, they will appreciate a more peaceful house and a more chilled mum. you're the boss, not your kids.

good luck - you can do it!

Ravenclaw

Glad to hear op. But get a wrist grip for adventurous toddler. They can roam a bit and some don't like holding hands. I had them with all mine and it's much easier.

Y y to angstybaby agree

Your younger two are just young, sounds pretty normal to me.

You older DD though is old enough to know she has to clear up her own mess and needs to buck her ideas up, you are not her slave.
In fact, 8 is plenty old enough to actually assist you occasionally with the youngest one.

1. Well done you.
2. 3 kids is hard ... It gets easier x
3. Going anywhere even with 2 adults you're outnumbered!
4. For some reason there's something v lonely about coping alone at the weekend.
5. Sh*t mums march on without a care. GOOD mums ask themselves every day "how could I have handled that better?"
6. DS has learnt to push your buttons by saying bad mummy, he is just fascinated because he's getting a response to that.
7. Usually I'm not coping goes hand in hand with I am tired.

Haven't read whole thread apologies if I'm just repeating others. Everyone who finds this easy is LYING xxx

Yes I agree, the older one should know better. Yesterday I was at work so she made her own lunch for today under dh's supervision and then made her sister's lunch for nursery as well. I think a few people have mentioned giving her more grown up responsibly so that was a step in that direction. She was really excited she could choose her lunch and it was a massive big help for me too. I did check their lunch boxes when I got home and there was a healthy mix of fruit, veg and a treat. I was very proud of her!

This morning dh got them dressed, fed and took them all to school and nursery. I feel relaxed today.

Yesterday was calmer than Sunday. I think the problem is my 2 year old who is really going Through a disobedient stage. I really hope nursery sorts that out. And ds did say I was a naughty rude mummy but it was because I wouldn't give him chocolate or treats from the treat tin right before dinner ...and I definitely know I was in the right there and didn't shout. I only repeatedly said "no".

Bloody hell op your 8 year old made herself lunch? Can I send my dippy 17 year old to you for a lesson. You must be doing something right.

I have been counting down the days til school starts again. DD (nearly 4) is at nursery 12-3 and DS starts nursery today..I felt a bit gutted yesterday to find out he is only in for an hour today xD Then I felt guilty about it.

A lot of people pretend they cope a hell of a lot more than they actually do. I know friends who make out their homelife is just perfect, kids always listen, never fight and that..but its bullshit. I expect the odd person really does have the 'perfect' child who never misbehaves or anything but I am certain that is rare.

My 2 have had to be changed 3 times this morning already as they seem to know we are doing something so obviously that means they have to get stupidly messy. 2YO is currently trying to suck my toes while refusing to speak to me. This morning DD punched DS in the face and he has the beginnings of a black eye. DD went to time out and just screamed full on for 30 minutes. This upset DS who also screamed. DD came off the naughty step and DS clawed her face, so she is going back to school with a big scratch mark. When people ask how they have been I will say 'fine'. Unless close friends ask, at which stage I will launch a full on rant about how my children have been possessed by demons for 6 weeks.

So yeah, fuck the holidays.

Would it work for all of you if you all divided the work in the house evenly instead of "not my mess, not my problem"?

Not read the whole thread op bit just came on to say I was completely at the end of my tether with mine. We he a family meeting. ( first ever) and I told asked them what might I be talking about involving their behaviour? They both knew straight away ( 6 and 9) I asked them what consequences they felt were right if they continued ( bickering, over reacting, etc etc etc ) anyway the point is we drew up new rules we all signed it so let's see how this goes. But I feel very similar I adore them both but often don't want to come home because it . Is. Constant!!!