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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

And a terrible mother to do this?

171 replies

daimbar · 02/09/2016 09:25

DD (14 months) has been waking in the night screaming hysterically for about 3 weeks.

Teething? nightmares? Tummy ache? Who knows. She is usually awake 1-3 hours in the night and will only settle after a bottle and / or being cuddled back to sleep. I work full time and am struggling.

She's exhausted, I'm exhausted, DP is exhausted the neighbours are probably exhausted too.

A week or so ago she had a heat rash and had a spoonful of baby piriton before bed. It made her drowsy and she slept a solid 11 hours.

DP is away this weekend. WIBU to give her piriton tonight as a one off, just so we both get a night of sleep?

OP posts:
Peppapogstillonaloop · 02/09/2016 17:13

Amazing for you monkey mamma Hmm
There are some real smug parents on here..and some real dramatists as well ffs she's talking about a spoonful of baby medicine not knocking her out with hardcore drugs. Perhaps if op had had any sleep in the last few weeks she would have the ability to sit and think rationally about what might be causing it and have the patience to try different methods..

HeCantBeSerious · 02/09/2016 17:18

She considered using a medicine (aka a drug) with properties that can cause children to become drowsy to make a child sleep. That's drugging a child in the same way that feeding one red bull to keep it awake is.

It's also inadvisable to treat symptoms and not cause.

Bagina · 02/09/2016 17:28

We had a screaming for attention toddler and a night terror toddler. There's a difference. Night terrors, there's not much we can do, just try and keep room cool etc. The attention screamer was different. We would obviously go in and check, change nappy, do temperature, give calpol almost as routine as he looked like he was in so much pain. We just couldn't keep making the bottles anymore, and we knew he didn't need them. None of us are in to co sleeping, but we'd bring him into our bed to do a test. Everytime he would turn into laughing, playing, thinking he was at soft play toddler. He would then be put back in the cot and left to cry it out. All he wanted was attention and to play. Even though we knew he was OK it still nearly killed us to leave him cry, but after 4 or 5 nights he never woke again in the night. He's nearly 5 now and still a great sleeper. Happy and confident too.

For this reason I'm a fan of crying it out. Just need a way to deal with the other one's night terrors and we'll all be happy and rested.

Yogimummy123 · 02/09/2016 17:35

Think it was very common in the 80s with phenergan! But I'd personally feel awful if anything happened & I had to explain that I'd given piriton without any need to.

Yogimummy123 · 02/09/2016 17:38

Ps the hungry baby milk is bad for baby guts cos it has extra protein in it that's poorly/slowly digested - it's the whey content I think. Apparently it should be banned. I wonder if good night milk has the same issue?

CafeCremeEtCroissant · 02/09/2016 17:44

An awful lot of sanctimonious bollocks going on!

daimbar my only hesitation would be that it can often have the opposite affect & cause hyperactivity 😖 I'd go for a 'precautionary' neurofen & calpol dosing. No formula. Bring her in with you if she wakes.

...better still, let her co sleep with your friend 😁

Luluandizzy · 02/09/2016 17:46

I would avoid doing that to get her to sleep Hun, tempting as it is. It's not good for anyone to have any type of medication unless the body actually requires it. Perhaps a nice warm bath with Johnsons bedtime bath, nice warm milk and a story, and put a top you have been wearing in bed with her? That way she can smell your smell and it will make her feel secure. It helps my son and he is too 14 months, hope this helps x

MiaowTheCat · 02/09/2016 17:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

amammabear · 02/09/2016 17:58

I'd be considering why it helped. Perhaps she genuinely IS having some sort of irritation or discomfort that the Piriton actually helped.

Irelephant · 02/09/2016 18:16

I have never even thought of doing this and my parenting is iffy laid back.

I'm not judging anyone by the way both of mine thankfully slept well. I just didn't know junior pirotin (sp) helped with sleep.

Insomnia is bad enough so god knows what sleep deprivation is like. Can't see it hurting as a one of op.

rockyroad3 · 02/09/2016 18:20

I wouldn't have any qualms about this as a one off. In fact a paediatrician prescribed chloral hydrate for my ds due to severe night terrors.

I wouldn't consider CIO for a second though.

Original poster
daimbar · 02/09/2016 19:05

Thanks again everyone for the wise words.

Bedtime in half an hour and she will have normal milk, no piriton and calpol if she won't settle. Keeping fingers crossed.

DF is delayed and not arriving until 9 - shame as could really do with an early night.

OP posts:
GiraffesAndButterflies · 02/09/2016 19:31

If I'm in time- try elevating the head of her bed with a towel under the mattress.

Helps with reflux, ear infections and congestion and totally non-medical. In fact why they don't just make the sodding mattresses like that I don't know...

GiraffesAndButterflies · 02/09/2016 19:33

Posted that fast to try and get in before bedtime, but just wanted to add that I'm in no way against medicine, just that this is something which is worth a try even if you're not sure whether/what medicine might actually help!

Good luck tonight WineWine

Original poster
daimbar · 02/09/2016 19:35

Thanks Giraffe - done!

OP posts:
maddening · 02/09/2016 19:39

What is her current nap schedule?

Original poster
daimbar · 02/09/2016 19:56

Not entirely sure on nap times as DP is home with her in the week but when I'm around it's an hour in the morning and 30 mins or so in the afternoon.

OP posts:
Irelephant · 02/09/2016 19:59

Hope you get a better nights sleep daim

Alfiedoggy · 02/09/2016 20:04

I'm sorry but I think you should give it...you sound exhausted. ..it won't do any harm at the correct dose...go for it. I would. You need your sleep. All these people berating you for even thinking it have clearly never had night after night of zero sleep ! Do it and don't beat yourself up for it. I know how you feel Flowers

diplodocus · 02/09/2016 20:12

It must be just as unpleasant for the child not being able to sleep. All these sanctimonious posters saying the OP should just suck it up and suggesting it's all about her comfort and convenience... What about the child? Not saying you should reach for the Phenergan, but I do get irritated when everyone seems to think it's just a problem for the parents.

MiaowTheCat · 02/09/2016 20:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HeCantBeSerious · 02/09/2016 20:28

All these people berating you for even thinking it have clearly never had night after night of zero sleep!

I had 9 months of it continuously with DH only home for 24 hours per week and no other family within 300 miles. DD would wake after a certain number of hours of sleep and be awake for exactly 2 hours from a very young age - matter of weeks.

I was on my knees with it but never took to drugging her, ignoring her or abandoning her.

Alfiedoggy · 02/09/2016 20:35

Try having it for 7 years.......with DH working away all week.....sorry but ...each to their own...it will do zero harm. ...whereas serious seep deprivation actually will Confused

Peppapogstillonaloop · 02/09/2016 22:48

Drama llama much hecantbeserious!!
op Is hardly suggesting any of those things..

diplodocus · 02/09/2016 23:14

You owe it to your child to pursue every safe avenue to address this problem. Martyrdom won't help them - lack of sleep affects their quality of life and development too. I hate it when parents wear lack of sleep as a badge of pride as if they are the only one if affects.

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