And a terrible mother to do this?

[daimbar]

DD (14 months) has been waking in the night screaming hysterically for about 3 weeks.

Teething? nightmares? Tummy ache? Who knows. She is usually awake 1-3 hours in the night and will only settle after a bottle and / or being cuddled back to sleep. I work full time and am struggling.

She's exhausted, I'm exhausted, DP is exhausted the neighbours are probably exhausted too.

A week or so ago she had a heat rash and had a spoonful of baby piriton before bed. It made her drowsy and she slept a solid 11 hours.

DP is away this weekend. WIBU to give her piriton tonight as a one off, just so we both get a night of sleep?

I possibly would if I was in your situation, as a one off. I definitely wouldn't be feeding her as long as she's eating enough food during day. Does she have a dummy?

Morethanonebaby - that's all well and good but you don't know if the baby's poorly or teething. You can't leave a poorly or baby in pain to cry themselves to sleep-busy day at work or not

It sounds awful but if DS is having a bad teething night then I'm very grateful for the effect a dose of calpol AND neurofen has. It knocks him out so he's at peace and so are we and so are the neighbours as we live in a flat. I get you OP. If your child is waking in the night then it could be teething anyway.
I think it's better to make sure they're not in pain even with the chance they're not..

But yes, try to make sure nothing else is causing the disturbed nights, like pain, illness, teeth, hunger, too much sleep too late in day etc. It can just be habitual and I found with my eldest a few nights of me giving up and saying, 'there's nothing I can do, you'll just have to cry', led to after 2 days a solid sleeper again. What's a few nights of crying for years of restorative sleep? Somehow my second child just never bothered with waking in the middle of the night after a few months. did she know I am a harsh mother?

I think you know that you shouldn't drug your child so you can get a good night's sleep and I hope you don't. FWIW Piriton always has my two bouncing off the walls - hyperactivity at 3am is not fun.

This will be unpopular but. I don't think you're being unreasonable if you're at the end of your rag. Just don't do it too often.

Sorry if I've upset anyone. Just meaning to offer another view. I know the crying business is controversial. But if no one ever says it's ok for babies to cry, some mums tear themselves to pieces and may even put themselves and their family at risk (e.g. Driving a car when exhausted, or doing a dangerous job). Just wanted to say, if you are thinking of giving drugs, you should probably try CIO first. That's all. shoot me now, I'm ready! I love my kids dearly, and do my utmost to look after them, especially when poorly. But they also need to learn to sleep, and I found this helped us all with that.

Desperate, not unreasonable! People have always done this, my MiLs top tip when dD was born was to put brandy in her bottle!!! Advised by her midwife friend......dh mentioned it to our midwife who wasn't very shocked and just said 'no, drink the brandy yourself and then bf, that way you'll both sleep'. I didn't ever do this btw.
Specifically with piriton one of the side effects can be nightmares, a friend gave it to 1 yr old for chickenpox and he got horrendous nightmares and she couldn't wake him out of the drowsiness and spent hours with a screaming, sleeping child.
How long have you been back at work? My dD was a great sleeper until I went back and put her in nursery at about 11 months. For about 6 months she woke in the wee hours and screamed for hours. I think she was traumatised by being abandoned, with hindsight I wish I had just taken her into bed with me and allowed her a bit of comfort. As your dp is away, could you just pop her into bed beside you when she wakes, and pehaps you would both be able to fall back asleep quite quickly?
As others mentioned, she may have some discomfort maybe from her recent cold. It's unlikely she has an ear infection as such or her temp would be up, but her ears could be plugged with wax making them hurt when she lies on them. Try a bit of Calpol when she wakes and see if it soothes her.
If she settles after a bottle do you think she's just hungry, maybe she is having a growth spurt or something? Could you give her an extra snack just before bed?
Good luck, and if it only started 3 weeks ago it's likely to be a temporary thing.

OP
Are you serious? It is horrendous to even think that. Good God...

Alright calm down. It's a dose of infant piriton not gin

yanbu, actually my dd Paeditrician told me to do that when taking her on the flight.

I don't know if it's the same for kids but I had to take piriton at night for itchy legs that stopped me sleeping. It only made me drowsy the first few times and then I got used to it.

My gp prescribed piriton in an effort to help my ds and his severely disordered sleep pattern (after trying many many other things). It didn't work.

When my daughter was having night terrors our GP actually prescribed this for her. Didn't make her sleepy/sleep deeper, if anything it made her more hyper before bed. But my point is if it isn't regular just a one off, it isn't the worse possible thing otherwise doctors would never recommend it.

This was 30 years ago, but my brother was prescribed Piriton for this very purpose because the GP (who had been a paediatrician before moving to general practice) thought the risk of harm coming to one of us because my parents hadn't slept in days was higher than any risk posed by one or two nights of Piriton for my brother. But he was horrendous wrt sleep. Didn't go more than 90 minutes until he was 3. The Piriton didn't actually work for him either :(

I have certainly given mine a dose of Calpol when I wasn't sure if they were in pain and they were screaming one night. Probably 2/3 times in a whole childhood when I wasn't utterly sure it was pain (I gave Calpol for obvious pain as well). Paracetemol does help sleep, there was a study on it the other day. It also isn't that good for them. It's what you think is right as a parent and I was happy with that.

Not sure what the fuss is about! Sleep deprivation is awful and you have my sympathies. If a small dose of priton works, do it. Catch up on sleep and get back your life. Don't feel bad about it but you are obviously aware enough to know it's not something you'll make a habit of.

My daughter gets terrifyingly hyper on Piriton so you could get more than you bargained for!

I'd do it, just for the one night. Apart from your own sleep, if your DD is getting 1-3 hours's sleep less than usually she's probably exhausted. A good night's sleep tonight might make her sleep better going forward.

(Course it might have zero effect whatesoever. Never can tell...)

As a one off, I don't see the problem. I would feel slightly guilty but not guilty enough if I had been sleep deprived for days. Our parents' generation put whiskey or brandy into their babies' bottles so I guess it's kind of the same thing.

If it's a regular thing, though, and quite recent, a trip to the GP to rule out a physical cause might be an idea. Even if there's not, your HV might help with sleep training techniques. Mine was useless all those years ago but times might have changed.

I would too and did with Ds, but he was older (over 3y and can't recall why he needed it at 3+ I bought it originally because he was a nightmare during our long flights) and it was the Australian version which really did work; the UK version is a watered down version anyway.

Medised gave him nightmares.

As long as you are only doing it once or twice, I don't see an issue; you can become murderous when you are exhausted.

Yes, terrible decision.

If she only settles after a bottle why is she crying for up to three hours? Just give her the bottle.

My DD was prescribed piriton to sleep as she has bad night terrors!

No, as a one off I think it is fine.
Sleep deprivation is horrible. Parenting, and getting through your day is so much easier on a clear head.

No YADNBU