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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Pardon?

520 replies

MothersGrim · 31/08/2016 19:04

AIBU to not bother with the word "Pardon" for my young children? It seems like a generational thing to me but my parents and in laws correct my young children when they ask "What?"

I was just curious what the expectation is nowadays, should I be teaching them 'pardon'? Is it bad manners not to Confused

OP posts:
user1471556502 · 02/09/2016 21:40

Oh we're definitely a 'pardon' household and I'm currently correcting my Ds daily when he says 'huh'. I would never see it as rude or common, just polite.

user1471556502 · 02/09/2016 21:45

Oh and were southeast too

BurnTheBlackSuit · 02/09/2016 21:50

This is facinating. I say most of the non-U words in the Wikipedia article. Which, if you read the article correctly, makes me middle-class and not upper class or working class.

Because that's what I am, I don't actually care. And I have no desire to be an investment banker or for my children to become investment bankers- they are far to nice for that.

Please can we discuss the use of "cloakroom"? My mother uses this (and I find that I do occasionally) for the downstairs toilet. WC, MC, UC or just odd? I have never heard anyone else say it ever!

No one has ever said "how do you do?" to me either. And I live in the Home Counties.

missyB1 · 02/09/2016 21:53

Never knew such embarrassing snobbery still existed, well it doesn't in my social circle anyway thank god. Some cringeworthy snobs lurking on here though Hmm

SukeyTakeItOffAgain · 02/09/2016 22:10

"Be kind"...yes that covers it I think. Kindness and consideration.

JeffreyNeedsAHobby · 02/09/2016 23:36

My very UC mum used to tell me to say "What?" if I misheard something. Matron at school was made almost apopleptic at this and constantly gave me black marks for not saying "Pardon?". I learned to adapt to survive.

Hated the matron and (feeling appeared to be mutual, but I was 6 so at least I had an excuse!) as a consequence also hate "Pardon". She also used to let her dog lick her open mouth

BlueStockingUK · 03/09/2016 00:33

Pardon is polite
what is rude
toilet is common
Loo's are posh
Sorry is when you're apologising

sandragreen · 03/09/2016 00:36

"Pardon" is an abbreviation of "I beg your pardon" and so is totally inappropriate as a way of explaining you have not heard something.

"What" is absolutely correct.

buffalogrumble · 03/09/2016 00:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 03/09/2016 02:31

buffling and in house we have:-

  1. Speak CLEARLY, I can't understand you! (3 mumbling teenagers)
albertcampionscat · 03/09/2016 03:06

Pardon's lower middle class aspirational and therefore naff, but not rude.

Juanbablo · 03/09/2016 06:21

We all say "pardon?" Or "sorry?" I know that "what" is supposed to be correct but I still think it's rude.

LynetteScavo · 03/09/2016 06:47

"Pardon?" is the one word I really don't like my DC saying. I don't care if other people say it, but not my DC.

DD had a Y3 teacher who insisted on "pardon". It took me about 6 months to undo her work. And it was the only thing DD actually learned that year.Hmm

"Pardon"is a bit like round carrots - completely wrong unless in a casserole.

LynetteScavo · 03/09/2016 06:50

Dementedma - I want a friend who says "gum boots" Grin

ffon · 03/09/2016 08:01

Gosh it's not that serious is it. People can say either really and as demonstrated, it's not so much rudeness as just difference in language use. Possibly the tone is more important than which word.

BertrandRussell · 03/09/2016 08:01

We say gum boots.

cosmicglittergirl · 03/09/2016 08:07

My DD 2.11 says 'What? What did you say?' I like it.

dementedma · 03/09/2016 08:09

My military brother has been known to say " Say again your last, over!"

Nzou1050 · 03/09/2016 08:31

I was taught to say pardon as it was more polite (in the South but DM northern working class). Interesting reading these type of threads. I'd forgotten I always said settee as a child as well. I have noticed I now say telly to my DC which definitely comes from my mum but I never notice anyone round here say.

Nzou1050 · 03/09/2016 08:38

Burn my northern Nan says cloakroom for toilet. Only person I've heard use it. She's very elderly. Working class roots but went to grammar school my grandad had a very middle class job. I'm sure people might say you can't change class but if anyone met her now they'd say middle class.

Personally I get confused by the class system. My friend who went to "independent" school (corrected me from saying private school) assures me I'm lower middle class!

Penvelopesnightie · 03/09/2016 08:43

dementedma: That is excellent , probably the best oneGrin

user1471734618 · 03/09/2016 08:43

We had a family friend who would ask if we needed to use the 'cloakroom' which would confuse me no end, as a child...Grin

user1471446348 · 03/09/2016 09:13

I'm from the North West and have never said pardon. I don't know anybody else who says it either. I'm definitely not posh and very Northern and I always say what.

user1471446348 · 03/09/2016 09:16

I also can't believe anybody cares about class 😂 Is it still a thing? I just like nice people and couldn't give a toss how they talk.

Carrie370 · 03/09/2016 09:20

I've just read this entire thread. NOBODY has mentioned 'ever so'.

squirms and shudders just typing that