WIBU to use my DDs savings on treatment for our dog?

[BecauseIbloodysaidsothatswhy]

Ok - so my lovely DF has recently given my 2 DDs some money (£500 each) to put into their child trust fund. DH & I have not been too happy with the trust funds as, for the past couple of years, they have actually lost money and, with the current financial uncertainty post Brexit, we thought it would probably be better just to keep the money in our savings account and then transfer it to the trust fund when the markets are a bit more stable. This means that, although the money probably wouldn't make them anything, what with interest rates being so low, at least we wouldn't lose any of the money (as we have the past couple of years).

Anyway, we've now discovered that our much loved family dog is ill and is going to need a (very expensive) operation followed by more (expensive) ongoing treatment which, tbh, we're going to struggle to afford.

So - WIBU to consider using some of our DDs savings money to pay for the dog's treatment? Obviously we would pay the money back as soon as we could so that the money would be back in the account, probably within the year so our DDs wouldn't lose the money (maybe minus some negligible interest they might have earned on it).

Obviously, if we had put the money straight into the trust fund then the money wouldn't be available to us & we would have found the money for the dog from somewhere but, seeing as it is just sitting in our account atm, would it be terrible to borrow some so that we're not struggling for the next few months?

YANBU, and I think you've had some very harsh replies as well.
Vet's bills and holidays, cars etc are very different, and don't lead to one another on a "slippery slope".
I'm sure if DC were old enough to decide they would be happy to help the family pet.
And you seem as though you gave the time and means to pay it back.

As others have said I would weigh up the options re Ddog and an expensive operation - how old he is, expectation of recovery, quality of life etc. But then I would do this regardless of where the money was coming from.

I wouldn't.

You have no savings yourself, so I doubt that you will be able to replace as you planned.

What if your cars need further work etc or replacing. I can imagine in a year, you won't have replaced it.

The big factor here is....will you be telling your dad that's what you have done?

Do it, of course.

Quite a lot of self-righteous 'Why don't you/why didn't you' going on on this thread.

No, it's not ideal, but needs must.

To the PP poster who asked why they didn't use their own savings, that has to be one of the most ignorant comments I have seen on this site.

YABU.

I would do anything to get the money for my dog, BUT borrowing money given to my children would be a last resort.

What are the other options you mentioned? Credit card? Loan? I'd do that, and suck it up on the interest.

Ok as long as you know you can replace it in the near future.

How much would it cost to have the dog put down? Could you afford ongoing treatment after the £1k is used as you mentioned follow-up treatment.
I'd use the money, people on MN get very worked up about it being not your money and how will you pay them back etc etc but I suppose I take a more pragmatic view of things. Use it.

The thing is, I'm not convinced that someone who has £1.74 in savings can 'replace it in the near future'.

I'm not judging, btw, just being realistic. I know OP had car emergencies, but it still seems there wasn't much of a buffer.

Yes, use it. You know that your future dd's would give their approval!

You know that your future dd's would give their approval!

The OP doesn't know that.

And to ask them would be putting them under terrible pressure to say yes.

What is wrong with the dog? It's worth discussing the financial situation with the vet (sometimes there is a cheaper plan B and C which might still result in an acceptable outcome). Don't expect them to offer a payment plan though. Few vets do- they are not licensed to provide financial services. I have occasionally worked for vets who are OK with half now, half after next month's paycheque, but almost nobody who will allow months and months of instalments. It's not so much the fact that it's an interest free loan, more that vets get burned again and again and again by people paying one or two instalments then ceasing to pay, and chasing and chasing people on the phone then through small claims court is everyone's most unfavourite, miserable time sucking job.

The dog is quite old (11yo) and has cancer but we've been told the type of cancer he has generally has quite a good prognosis if found early (which ours has been - no indications that it had spread beyond the original site). The operation will consist of removing the tumour and he will then have a few months of preventative chemotherapy to hopefully prevent the cancer returning.

The Vet seems quite optimistic and, even though he is quite old, he does potentially have several healthy years still ahead of him. It might be the worst happens and we do end up losing him after all this but I feel as though we should at least give him a chance.

My DF is a real dog lover and loves our little dog to bits so I know he would want us to do our best for him. However, I'm reluctant to ask him about borrowing the money as I know he would try to pay for the treatment himself (he has form) and I don't think he can really afford it (he's in his 80s and been living off his pension for over 20years). My DF is absolutely lovely and would give us his last penny to help us out but I would feel uncomfortable taking any more money off him (he would refuse point blank to let us pay him back).

Koala, i would agree. My response a couple of posts ago could be seen as one of the more slightly judgy/harsh ones, but it's exactly because of the fact that i've been there (in OP's position financially) in the past that i said what i said.

I know how easy it is to say 'we'll pay it back of course'. Then life bites you on the arse again and you're even further down shit creek AND you've spent your kids savings! We dipped into kids savings for food twice. £50 or so. Wouldn't do £100s on vets fees.

Xposted with you OP.

My opinion still stands though

My sister did something similar with money I specifically gave to my neice's ISA. I felt betrayed and a little used tbh. Now, I don't give my sis any cash & will just transfer money directly into my neice's accounts.

FYI my neice's Junior ISA is 40% up since it was set up. So like others have suggested, it's probably a good idea to transfer into one.

My parents did this and I never saw the money again. All my savings.
It wasny just money that had been gifted to me fior Smas and birthdays over the years, it was money I had earned from my Saturday job as well.

With my DC's I got them their own savings accounts with just their names on.
If you do borrow the cash ask your DC's and make a point of repaying it.

No I wouldn't use the children's money for this. Ask the vet if they have an instalment plan for entire treatment including operation.

I'd borrow it but I'd also educate myself about finances.

It is normal for long term funds to lose a bit of money at some point. If you want security choose a deposit account. Also does your 4yo really have a child trust fund? Surely she's too young

AND i certainly wouldn't be expecting a 4 and 6 year old to be able to thrash out the logistics of spending a heap of money on an old dog with cancer. Who ever threw that one in.

I'm sure you could come up with a way to repay a loan from your DF if you really put your mind to it, OP.

Ask your dad to lend it to you.

BUT, refuse to take the money unless he gives you his bank account details so you can repay him by direct transfer, monthly.

You will feel more 'accountable' if you owe it directly to your dad, as it will be embarrassing if you miss a repayment. Unlike if you borrow if from your two young children.

It's not a case of me not being able to pay my DF back suburban it's the fact that he won't let me pay it back. I would quite happily pay him back but i know that just wouldn't happen. He would just refuse to take any money off me & I'd be quite uncomfortable with that.

Borrowing from children when they're too young to give informed permission is a bit dubious tbh. Especially when there may be problems repaying it.

OP, listen firstly to CAIPORA, she is guiding you correctly.
If your dog, will make a good recovery, then speak to your Father, and explain the situation, he can advise how you pay it back.
It is very easy to borrow money, and not put it back, when there is no one to
guide you, so to speak.
The money would be better left where it is, if possible.
I am in no way suggesting that you are taking from your daughters.
Please give your darling dog a gentle belly rub, hope all goes well.

The child trust fund were set up when they were born moving with the £250 we got from the government

I am assuming that you are not eligible for free PDSA care but could you call them and explain the situation and see if they can offer your dog treatment at a reduced rate.

For example a friend had a cat that needed some teeth removed. The vet quoted £300-£350 for everything.

She was eligible for free PDSA treatment but the PDSA tell you how much it costs them to treat the animal and ask for a contribution.

The PDSA told her the treatment cost £150. Obviously she couldn't afford to cover it all and gave them £75.

The PDSA were surprised that she had given so much as apparently a lot of people don't give anything at all even for repeated visits.

The original vet has seen the cat again seen then and he said that she is doing well but the point I am trying to make is that the care they give is not inferior to a private vet, it is just that they don't need to make a profit.

I am not sure that they can do anything to help you but surely it is worth a phone call??