AIBU - husband comments on weight loss after birth

[JessieMc123]

AIBU? I've got an 8 week old and I'm currently around a stone heavier than I was before I was pregnant (I was size 8-10 and now more like a 12 - mostly just bigger boobs and bum but definitely not back into all my normal clothes!) - my DH just showed me a picture of his friend's wife who had twins a month ago and is now back in her pre-preg skinny jeans. I feel really upset that he thinks this is reasonable, when my confidence is low... I'm not exercising much but I'm exhausted and breastfeeding constantly! He thinks I'm a cow for telling him he was being a d*ck showing me that. What do you think - AIBU??

Your DH is an utter dick. No doubts about it. Selfish twat.

Please don't show him the thread. This cannot be the only nasty thing he's done and you may need mumsnet in the future to get some perspective.

How is he when he isn't being a misogynistic tosser?

Dick. Definitely a dick

I think he sounds less of a dick when OP quotes him verbatim.

And it's the wider groups around TwinsMother who are actively praising her who are having the major toxic influence here.

utter twat. completely out of line comment and not helpful or caring.

He's a thoughtless dick but have you told him that he hurt you by comparing? Maybe he was just being an idiot without thinking

Total dick. Yes to him being on duty 24 hours so you can get to those toning yoga classes!

No, you're not being unreasonable, it was insensitive. And you're not a trophy, it's not a competition between women, on top of this, size twelve is still slim and uour baby is only a few weeks old.

You're not fat.

I had two babies inside a year, went from a toned 12-14 to an 18 and I look like a burst ball, various health problems since have let to me having a swollen abdomen and just generally looking and feeling like shit. DP has been supportive the whole way, always tells me I'm perfect the way I am, supported me in my various mad diets despite telling me that he didn't think there was anything wrong with me but if it makes me happy he'll back me all the way. Your man sounds like an insensitive arsehole at best.

What an insensitive nasty cunt he is. I'd show him a photo of some divorce papers.

I would divorce the prick. My daughter is two and a half and I don't fit comfortably into my pre pregnancy clothes, and probably never will my body shape is completely different to before. I really hope he's willing to do all your meal prep so you dont have to try and cook healthy meals with a baby hanging off your nipple, let you sleep the necessary 8h per night to have energy to then go to the gym three times a week while he looks after your baby. Prat

I would divorce the prick. My daughter is two and a half and I don't fit comfortably into my pre pregnancy clothes, and probably never will my body shape is completely different to before. I really hope he's willing to do all your meal prep so you dont have to try and cook healthy meals with a baby hanging off your nipple, let you sleep the necessary 8h per night to have energy to then go to the gym three times a week while he looks after your baby. Prat

This thread is over 2 months old ..

Honestly OP I bet if it were a photo of her in a swimsuit it would be a different story.
No woman has twins without having a very baggy belly for a considerable length of time, its just the way it is.
Ds1 was nearly a year old before I got to anything like my pre pregnancy shape/weight, Ds2 about the same amount of time, after the DT's although I regained my pre pregnancy weight after 18 months, my figure never!
My guess is his friends wife is not breastfeeding (can be a bit overwhelming with twins) don't even attempt to diet or exercise until you feel ready and in the meantime point out how hurt you are by his comments.

This thread is from August...

A few months after id had my ds i looked out of the bedroom window and saw my step dad over the road chatting to my brother, I opened the window and shouted out hiya, what are you 2 conspiring about.

My step dad shouted back, were chatting about how much weight you've put on. In the middle of my neighbours getting into their cars, he thought that was appropriate. I also had a comment made from my lovely well meaning elderly lady neighbour next door.

Sorry but any person who comment on another weight (Especially after giving birth) is a massive dick in my opinion. The only person who can mention weight is yourself if discussing it and your dr if they're asking for health reasons. everybody else can get to fuck about weight.

This thread is from August.