To think he should be paid for his time?

[MargotRogers]

Name changed as this is very identifying.

DS is 24 and autistic, he's selectively mute, which means that although he can physically speak and understand, he also isn't able to make himself speak.

He's also a mechanic, this is all honestly down to my older brother who owns a garage. DS has always been good with cars, ever since he was little but after helping him apply for apprenticeships at 16, he just kept getting turned down as he can't actually handle people at all.

He doesn't like to be touched, rarely raises his head and won't communicate with anyone.

DBrother gave him an apprenticeship at his garage and then a job for two days a week. As it was his garage, no one bothered DS or gave him a hard time, it was close enough to walk too and I can tell he really likes it.

DBrother's garage is now going through a rough time and he may have to start letting people go, he's asked if instead of firing someone he could just not pay DS for a while until things get a bit better.

He said that DS is the only one that won't be negatively effected. He lives with us, we happily provide everything for him and he does get benefits as well, so he doesn't need Dbrother to pay him and he won't even realise it or properly understand.

Whereas the other people he employs, live pay check to pay check, they rely on the money to pay for their food and rent.

DS is unlikely to ever get another place as nice to work in, he enjoys going there but DBrother can't give me a definite date on when he may be able to start paying him, I don't know what right for DS, I don't want him taken advantage of but I don't want him to lose this job either.

Op; have you spoken yourself to your DB to find out the full situation? Whilst I fully understand your DS is forefront your DB also deserves to be heard given the support he gave your DS when no one else would.

OP it seems like you have reached a conclusion about your DS and whether he should work for free, and it looks like he has more prospects than you initially thought - which is really good news. Good luck to him.

However you also sound really angry/annoyed/let down by your DB and have taken what he said as an attempt to exploit your son. Could I suggest that you sit down and have a conversation with him about how that came across to you and be open to that fact that it may have come across in a way he didn't intend?

It sounds like in the past your DB has been incredibly supportive - above and beyond the call of duty - and it would seem surprising if after all that he suddenly changed his mindset and became intentionally exploitative now.

To me it sounds as though he is in an incredibly stressful position regarding his business and this is probably impacting on other areas of his life. He is probably having to make some really tough decisions that he hates to make, and it is quite possible in that context that the way he expressed this situation to you came across as exploitative when that was not what he was intending. Certainly I can see a way that he was trying to help your DS rather than exploit him - and that would seem to fit more with what he has done in the past.

It would just be a shame for their to be bad feeling between you and your DB over what could be a misunderstanding over semantics.

Hyacinth: But the OP did clearly say he doesn't sit round doing nothing, didn't she? So, although he isn't dealing with customers, he is still working on the cars. That is what he does. Whenever another worker is dealing with a customer, there is no reason to think he isn't available for work on a vehicle.

She did indeed, but she had not stated he was doing extra to make up which is what you said. That was an assumption. There's no getting round that, and you shouldn't have been countering people saying that by claiming they were implying he gets nothing done.

Hopefully the meeting goes well on Wednesday OP. It was always pretty clear DBs proposal was legally dubious (although thinking about it selfishly, any repercussions would be his problem not yours or your son's...) so for me at least the big question would be what other opportunities might there be?

Well said Deathstare. That's exactly how I read the situation too.

Just read back my last post, I didn't mean to sound so angry/annoyed.

When we last tried to find DS employment he was 16/17 looking to be trained and no mechanic/garage would bother, now he's 24, fully trained and qualified with experience behind him to prove that he can cope in those environments and social worker believes that this will make it far easier for him to find something as unlike before he isn't a huge risky investment, iyswim and that the employment grants available will make him more appealing and may balance out the worries an employer would have, she said she'd look for schemes that bypass the interview process and was honestly very hopeful.

I'm not mad at DB at all, as a family we owe him a lot, I don't think he's trying to exploit DS, I think he was trying to help him as he knows how much good working does for DS, the last person I would want to get into trouble is DB and this could put him in a horrible legal position, he could lose far more then he realises by helping DS again and this I believe is the best way to protect them both.

I see what you meant, OP. The arrangement would be exploitative in the legal sense of the word and you don't want your DB putting himself in hot water any more than you want your DS exploited. Your brother does sound like a lovely man, but this just isn't quite right.

It sounds complicated.

I only know of a similar story with a company and no disabilities. They've dropped their entire work force to 4 days only, so they're saving on 3 days of overheads.

They've also had periods where they've worked 3 days but paid 4, balanced out later when they've worked 4 days but been paid 3. I suspect the overheads cost and the wage cost cancel each other out.

I don't know what the answer is, but if your ds is labouring for free, I'd want to know his wages would be made up at a future point when business picks up, and what happens when or if it doesn't? Why should he be the only one to suffer simply because of his lifestyle and your ability to ensure he doesn't go without.

Yes, your son has done a kind thing by offering him an apprenticeship. But there must have been rules as to how that would work regardless of the family connection.

I want to go down to the job centre with DS and speak to someone about his chances of other employment, maybe they have some schemes he'd be eligible for and speak to DB about other garages that may consider him
OP I would definitely go to the JCP and speak to them, not only so your son can see what is available but also so you can ask about whether they can put you in touch with an advisor who knows about all the laws surrounding volunteering, benefits and insurance and the like.

If I were you I would call ahead and ask to make an appointment with an advisor that deals with disability (horrible word) so that you when you get there you don't waste time speaking to an advisor that can't help you as much as you would like.