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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Barber bruises AIBU?

34 replies

LizzieBabe · 25/08/2016 21:16

My 8 year old DS has Aspergers and having his haircut is a big deal for him. It took a lot of persuading but today he went for his haircut, it wasn't his usual barber but ds did very well and carried on. During the cut he was complaining it was hurting (which he usually does as he doesn't like the noise/sensation of the clippers etc) I gave him my phone to distract him from a meltdown and he barber carried on..

Anyway later on this evening ds has 2 finger size bruises appearing on his forehead (I'm assuming where the barber was holding his head). He doesn't bruise easily so to be honest I'm livid!! AIBU to want to go back in to the barber and give him a piece of my mind?! Has this ever happened to anyone else? I'm so annoyed I don't quite know what to do right now..!

OP posts:
Witchend · 25/08/2016 21:32

Surely you'd notice of he was holding his head that hard. I can't imagine an 8yo boy just sitting there and accepting it either.

Advicepls7080 · 25/08/2016 21:33

I'm shocked to be honest it's actually quite hard to bruise the forehead unless you do infact bruise easily it takes quite a bit of force

NoFuchsGiven · 25/08/2016 21:40

I can not imaginge a scenario where a parent would stand and watch their child being held so hard by their head that it would bruise. Have you tried washing it, are you sure it is not oil finger marks from the clippers?

A bruise on the forehad takes a lot of brute force.

Original poster
LizzieBabe · 25/08/2016 21:40

This is a pic of his forehead tonight..maybe I'm over reacting?? No I didn't notice him holding him that hard but I wasn't standing next to him, I was sitting behind him. He couldn't wait to get out of the chair but that's normal for him so didn't think anything of it..ah man now I feel awful 😔

Barber bruises AIBU?
OP posts:
Original poster
LizzieBabe · 25/08/2016 21:41

And this was taken after he had got out the shower..

OP posts:
Wibblywobblyfoo · 25/08/2016 21:42

Those marks don't look like finger marks. They are far too big. Could he have done it in any other way.?

NoFuchsGiven · 25/08/2016 21:46

Did they use any products? Could it be an allergic rection (blotching)? I can just not imagine bruising like that from a hair cut without a child screaming the place down and a parent not noticing.

I used to have to physically pin my ds down for a hair cut/nail trimming etc and never once did he bruise in any way.

rosesarered9 · 25/08/2016 21:46

Wibblywobblyfoo They maybe finger marks, considering the head size of an 8 yo. Or it could be the camera? Remember this rat?

rosesarered9 · 25/08/2016 21:47

But as PPs have said, it's quite difficult to imagine a child being held that hard without saying anything.

rosesarered9 · 25/08/2016 21:47

*may be

Wibblywobblyfoo · 25/08/2016 21:50

I've got an 8 yr old, no way would a thumb mark look that large on him. (And he's tiny) it looks like something my son would have done with a suction type toy instead!

pictish · 25/08/2016 21:51

I think they are finger marks, yes. He must have been holding his head quite firmly.

MakeMyWineADouble · 25/08/2016 21:51

They don't look quite right for finger marks is there anyway he has fallen and not made a fuss or leant against something? They could be and if they are definitely something should be said but personally I would have to be 100% before I went back

Advicepls7080 · 25/08/2016 21:52

They're not from fingers OP unless the barber has the worlds biggest hands. Is there a possibility he's knocked his head playing

Original poster
LizzieBabe · 25/08/2016 21:54

No products, only water, he won't let them use products. The only other time he's had a mark like that was when he stuck one of those arrows with the suckers on the ends on his forehead but that was a perfect circle (was difficult not to laugh..)

I put my finger up to it and it's only a tiny bit bigger than that because I thought the same to start with.

OP posts:
pictish · 25/08/2016 21:55

But surely the pressure and the blood flooding to the surface can make a bruise bigger. My son fell on the steps outside a few days ago and hit his thigh on the corner. His whole upper thigh is bruised, not just the bit that made contact. Iyswim?

MakeMyWineADouble · 25/08/2016 22:10

It's not impossible for it to be fingers at all, I have some experience with therapeutic holding and I have know some pretty firm holds not leave bruises, especially as you say he was acting as he normal was. Like I say it's not impossible though (not sure that's any help sorry)

Idefix · 25/08/2016 22:14

They look more like a skin reaction rather than finger bruises tbh.

Iggii · 25/08/2016 22:49

My little boy came out crying from the barbers with blood on his face. He is a big fidgeter and probably made it hard for the barber but he's never going back there again.

bumsexatthebingo · 25/08/2016 23:40

If he has sensory issues he may not have reacted 'typically' to being held to tightly. I wouldn't be surprised that a child with AS didn't verbalise their discomfort either.
I don't think you cn go in making accusations unless you are 100% sure but I certainly would be going elsewhere for future haircuts.

SoupDragon · 25/08/2016 23:46

Surely there would be more than 2 if it was a grip tight enough to bruise. The configuration looks wrong too.

bumsexatthebingo · 25/08/2016 23:49

Are there any other marks under the hair? Middle one looks like 2 finger marks to me.

Gileswithachainsaw · 25/08/2016 23:55

I'm actually struggling to work out why position he would have had to have held him in to achieve that. Surely you'd have noticed him being rough with his head?

GinIsIn · 25/08/2016 23:57

I don't think that can be finger marks - for the fingers to grip there long and hard enough to bruise, surely the hand and arm would be in the way of cutting the hair?

WorraLiberty · 26/08/2016 00:04

I'm not saying it is or it isn't, because obviously I don't know.

But, that is exactly what mosquito/gnat bites look like on my son's forehead - and they don't always itch either when bitten there.

Bites on any other part of his body, look like normal bites and they do itch.

But on his forehead, that's exactly what they look like OP.