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AIBU?

To think by this age he knows he's being rude but also wwyd

121 replies

toomuchconfusion · 22/08/2016 19:10

Whenever I see a long standing friend her 8 year old waits for her to leave the room then looks up from whatever he's doing and tells me I'm fat - every time! He's told me "you're so fat you might pop", "you look really fat", "why are you such a fatty bum bum" " you're really greedy why don't you stop eating" (even though i rarely eat in front of him and certainly no more than his own parents). I have tried to talk to him about it but he isn't interested in responses he just seems to want to hurt or insult me.

I haven't raised it with his parents because I suspect they would gloss over it and then just laugh about it later.

To be clear I am fat so I have zero issues with observations to that effect but this has gone way beyond that. If it was one if my kids (similar ages) I would be mortified!

He should know better right? Plus what do I do about it, if anything? I'm finding myself making excuses not to see them not helped by my issues with anxiety.

OP posts:

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Rollonbedtime7pm · 22/08/2016 19:37

Tell him "yes that's true but I can lose weight - you will always be a rude little fuckwit"

Kidding (sort of) - seriously, I would stop going and tell the parents why when they ask why you've stopped.

edwinbear · 22/08/2016 19:41

I'd want to know if my ds (6) was saying such nasty, spiteful things, so I could deal with it appropriately.

toomuchconfusion · 22/08/2016 19:45

There's a good chance it comes from the parents or like I said at least the Dad.

I am very close to making my excuses or meet them somewhere else. When we meet at an attraction he's distracted more and less likely to get the opportunity.

He just laughs at his Mum when she tells him off so doesn't give me much faith that it would be addressed. Regardless I think i'm going to have to say something to her when he does it next time. Loving the suggestions on how to broach the subject!

OP posts:

voddiekeepsmesane · 22/08/2016 19:45

So you say to your friend ..."everytime you leave the room your child tells me I'm fat. It may be true but I really don't need an 8 year old telling me so" then wait. If response is OMG so sorry will talk to him then fair enough on the other hand if response is laughing it off then dump friend and her rude child IMO

mydietstartsmonday · 22/08/2016 19:46

Just call him a little cunt with a smile on your face, when he uses the word in front of his parents he will get crucified, you just deny it, of course you wouldn't say anything like that.....that will teach home to mess with you.

cdtaylornats · 22/08/2016 19:53

Rude or honest - perhaps he'll grow up to be one of those "I speak as a find" people - you know sociopaths. Keep a look out for any sacrificed pets.

LunaLoveg00d · 22/08/2016 19:55

Never mind telling the parents, next time the child says it you say VERY loudly so everyone can hear "Don't you dare talk to me like that, it's VERY rude!"

Lunar1 · 22/08/2016 19:57

Not really surprising he has friendship problems is it if that's how he speaks to people. Tell his parents.

Lunar1 · 22/08/2016 19:57

Not really surprising he has friendship problems is it if that's how he speaks to people. Tell his parents.

TheWeeBabySeamus1 · 22/08/2016 19:57

I'd be tempted to say, "Yes I am, and you're very rude and I'll be telling your mum what you just said."

I've got zero patience for cheeky kids though.

Oldisthenewblack · 22/08/2016 19:57

Tell him he's an ugly little fucker and you're going to come round while he's asleep and put spiders all over him.

TheWeeBabySeamus1 · 22/08/2016 20:01

Tell him he's an ugly little fucker and you're going to come round while he's asleep and put spiders all over him

I've changed my mind... I'd definitely be saying this ^^ instead 😂

toomuchconfusion · 22/08/2016 20:08

The last suggestion is hilarious. Spiders are a good threat!!

OP posts:

Bluetrews25 · 22/08/2016 20:08

Have to agree with some PPs - my first thought was that he is repeating what he has heard his parents saying.
So sorry, OP, hope I am wrong.

Amelie10 · 22/08/2016 20:08

Yes no wonder he can't make friends, he's a horrible shit. Let his mother know either way.

clam · 22/08/2016 20:10

I teach 8 year olds. Trust me, this is appalling behaviour.

Tell his parents. Their reaction will point the way forward for you. If they're horrified and deal with it, great. If they laugh/deny/minimise, find new friends.

FrancisCrawford · 22/08/2016 20:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hereforthebeer · 22/08/2016 20:13

He's a bully.

If he parents won't do anything, I wouldn't bother. maybe stop going round or have a good retort

'its an allergy, it only comes up when i'm around bullies who stick their nose in my business' or whatever you think would work....

LittleCandle · 22/08/2016 20:16

That is horrific! Little git! I would be telling the parents as well as telling him off, and if they minimize it, then I would be finding other friends. Of course he knows what he is doing. I doubt if I could have kept my mouth closed as long as you appear to have done.

mikado1 · 22/08/2016 20:22

God, I am very 'see it from the child's point of view' and I know my friends think I make excuses for children's behaviour sometimes but this is horrendous. I would and your friend should be appalled and actually very worried. Love the spiders one ha ha! I would feel rely bullied and intimidated by this, 8yo or not. Horrible.

MermaidTears · 22/08/2016 20:22

I would say 100% he has heard his dad say this. Think you need new friends. I bet he's dad would be mortified if you said... guess what little johnny has been saying to me....has he heard that anywhere? Said with a pointed look! Bastards.

toomuchconfusion · 22/08/2016 20:29

As a fatty I get used to the comments so pretty much try to minimise or ignore them. Especially as I know he doesn't get on too well with people at school.

That is exactly my fear that it comes from the parents and it's their true feelings about me. I can't move past that because if they are openly slating me in front of their kids then I am through putting effort in to the friendship.

The only way to know is to see them again and mention it to his Mum. I should see them before the end of the summer holiday.

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Trifleorbust · 22/08/2016 20:29

My god, that's rude. I would tell his parents right away.

Chippednailvarnishing · 22/08/2016 20:32

I don't know if I'm more shocked by the boys behaviour or your reluctance to actually tell his parents.
I couldn't be friends with someone if my concerns about what they truly thought about me actually resulted in me taking abuse from their child. WTAF.

TwinkleTwinkleLittleBat · 22/08/2016 20:35

There's something disturbingly calculating about a kid of 8 calmly waiting for his opportunity and then repeatedly bullying an adult. Blimey, he sounds horrendous. I wonder what else he gets up to.

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