"Oh I didn't have you down as a mum of girls"

[OohMavis]

So this has been said to me a couple of times now, and I am confused. I promise that the next time someone says it I'll ask what they mean, but for now, mumsnet thread!

AIBU in thinking that there's no sort of marker for a mother of boys or girls? What does a mother of girls act/dress/speak like? How am I falling so short as to be unbelievable?!

Maybe it's the fact I have a 6yo DS too. Maybe he's polluted my 'mum of girls' vibe

What do they MEAN?

I'm probably the typical mum of boys then...I always wear minimal make up, if any, I hates skirts, just knot my hair up in a bun and I've never had my nails done. Yes I have 3 boys. But I dressed the same before having the children. I only really wanted a girl when I was expecting. Now I cannot imagine having girls.

I should hope it was obvious it was a rhetorical question and I am well aware it is the patriarchy!

What does annoy me is this idea (not necessarily stated by anyone on this thread, but one I come across regularly) that mums of boys are all like "oh yeah, I love the patriarchy me, it will help my kids get ahead". Erm, no. I don't personally think the patriarchy actually serves the interests of any decent human. It does help a lot of people obtain power and make money, but those are not my benchmarks for success in this world. It is also very hard for women to undo in their male children because we are not the default role model. I married a reasoonably decent man but like most men, he remains relatively blind to a lot of his privilege...

My hope is with the younger generation gender roles do seem to be a bit more fluid (and I don't mean trans stuff as such) though change is achingly slow.. but in general shaming any child for their behaviour as opposed to promoting and richly reinforcing prosocial and decent behaviour isn't a strategy I personally subscribe to. I think all the posts about rough little boys (which again are rife) are as bad as the ones about demure colouring little girls.

Re SMOG and whether it is foul, I have to say I've ended up using it not knowing it was a term, but only to describe myself (ruefully).

As in:

I realise now I was smug Mum of a girl thinking it was down to me that DD did X/Y/Z at whatever age.

DS1 came out with a good one on this the other day. He said to me 'you're not a girly girl which is why you had boys but Auntie L is very girly which is why she had a daughter'. Before explaining that it doesn't work like that I asked him what he meant by a girly girl. He replied it's a girl who wears make up and silly shoes!

Before I got pregnant I was told they could see me with a boy. When I was pg and found out I was carrying a boy, the reaction was "Oh, thank God!
That made me laugh.

Reminds me of a story in the Times Educational Supplement magazine from a few years ago. A reception teacher had written in about his class, about a time when one lad piped up with, "Girls can't play K'Nex!" He said he sat them all down and they had a big chat about whether or not this was true, and decided on a bit of positive discrimination for the rest of the afternoon, whereby ONLY the girls were allowed to play with the K'Nex. He went along later in the afternoon to see how the girls who were playing K'Nex were getting on. "Look!" they cried, "We've made a Hoover!"

Is that supposed to be a joke or did it actually happen It doesn't sound real

Some people do say stupid things.
Next time you'll just have to say "and what exactly do you mean by that?"