WIBU to shout at this girl?

[WindInThePussyWillows]

Was driving along a busy road - 40mph limit was doing about 30 as trafficy.
Younger woman, 19 stepped out in the road with headphone in and glued to her phone and ran across the road.
I had to emergency stop to avoid hitting her and the car behind went smack into me. The other car saw her step out and weren't mad they said they of done the same and couldn't believe I didn't hit her.

I had my very young baby twins in the back of my car (who are fine we've been checked) but I told the girl how stupid she had been and how careless she was and lucky she didn't cause a worse accident.
I did raise my voice I was so angry and shook up and worried.

She said it was inappropriate for me to shout at her as she's only 19 and still a child.
I said if she classes herself as a child and can't take responsibility for her actions and acts so carelessly she shouldn't be out without a chaperone (I know that's not the case but she wanted to play the child card)

She then told me to fuck off and walked off, glued to her phone and plugged her headphones back in.

I'm only 23 so not like a much older woman yelling at a kid.

WIBU?

[limitedperiodonly]

You did nothing wrong OP. But don't try to track her family down as she probably got that snowflake terminology from them.

I think you're being too soft repentatleisure. We should hunt these people down and stamp out this dangerous ideology at source.

If it saves one life...

[TheFairyCaravan]

So someone who saw the woman step off the kerb still managed to drive into the back of you with your baby twins in the back and the first thing you do is shout at the woman? How did she hear what you were saying if she was plugged into headphones? Wasn't the first thing on your mind the twins? Were you not seething with the person behind who was driving too close?

I agree with others, it's quite unbelievable!

[Dontyoulovecalpol]

So what's the point then 5minutes? It's rare, it still has nothing to do with the police (insurance) so what's the point?

Calling the police and posting her picture on FB? You're bloody nuts

[youarenotkiddingme]

You were very restrained IMO!

I'm glad you and your babies are ok.

It really annoys me that drivers can be arrested and charged with dangerous driving yet she caused an accident which will affect another drivers insurance and have to pay excess and she walks off Scott free. Yet entirely her fault.

[manicinsomniac]

YWNBU. I would fully have expected to be shouted at.

A couple of weeks ago I was out on a walk with friends and we'd just stepped back onto the road after being pretty lost in the hills for a while. We were on a very quiet country road but not behaving as we should have been. I'd literally just said, 'We need to be facing the traffic' and prepared to cross when a car cam fast round the bend. We weren't in particular danger but must have shocked her. We crossed over quickly and the car slowed, opened the window and yelled 'you need to face the oncoming traffic, idiots!' We didn't have a come back at all, she was absolutely right. We just apologised and carried on. That's what the girl should have done. Though, having caused an accident, I think I'd also have been offering to pay for it.

Yes, technically the car behind was at fault but really it was the pedestrian. In more built up areas with lots of traffic very few cars leave a full stopping distance between them - it's actually quite big, especially if wet.

[limitedperiodonly]

At 19 I was being paid to look after three actual children and prevent them from being run over and the like.

Wow. That's just like being parachuted into Nazi-occupied Europe in 1942. Except it's not.

[limitedperiodonly]

technically the car behind was at fault

Failing to leave a safe stopping distance means they are definitely at fault.

[Hope34]

OMG

I hope you are all getting over the shock

What a fool she is and an adult....not a child.
She was lucky you were a good driver a could react on time, the fact that your children were in the car, I would have spoken harshly and would not have been able to contain myself

[Blizy]

You did well not to hit her. I'm glad you and your babies are ok. You will have to replace their car seats I'm afraid if they've been involved in accident.

[BabooshkaKate]

I'd have gone nuclear tbh

[NotYoda]

DH cycles a lot - gets this a lot. If someone can't see and hear a car, what hope have they got of seeing and hearing a cyclist - and potentially killing them by knocking them off their bikes/into the path of a car.

I would have heeled - you were frightened and angry, understandably so.

She should have apologised profusely

I am also very confused about any 19 year old who would say they were a child

[Xmasbaby11]

I'd have been annoyed too - although it was the driver in the car behind that was at fault.

[AndNowItsSeven]

19 isn't a child , a 16 year old is a child though groove.

[Longdistance]

I would have grabbed her phone and lobbed the fucking thing as far as I could.

Child my arse!

[WindInThePussyWillows]

Hello sorry have had to sort out 2 new car seats this afternoon

Yes yes re the driver who hit me took all responsibility and was great about it swapped insurance bla bla and the insurance have said I can claim back cost of new car seats.
I don't know why my initial reaction was to apologise to the driver behind, in hind sight obviously they were way too close or not paying enough attention to stop in time.

I was just so mad at the stupid bitch young lady.

We are all fine

[Joydgreen88]

How is it unbelievable? Have you studied every single human interaction and answer to every question in every circumstance? It's getting v dull seeing threads constantly hounded and policed by people not believing anything. Don't keep reading it if you don't think it happened!

OP glad you and your babies are ok!

[myownprivateidaho]

I think you were probably both in a state of shock. It is a bit road ragey to shout at a pedestrian I'm afraid, even if they're in the wrong. But understandable that you were shaken.

[PresidentOliviaMumsnet]

Evening all
Bit of peace and love please

[2kids2dogsnosense]

a) - 19 is legally an ADULT
b) - even children who re old enough to be out on their own are expected to take some responsibility for their on road safety
c) - "fuck off"? Well, that's certainly infantile language!
d) - driver behind IS responsible - he should have allowed a reasonable stopping distance
e) - you must have had a hell of a shock- you had potentially killed to injured someone (through no fault of your own) and had been met with aggression, your little babies were in the car and could also have been injured or shocked by the accident (also raises your adrenaline levels), - you must have had a terrible fright.

I hope you are feeling better now - and NO! - YANBU!

[limitedperiodonly]

The responses on this thread have made me rethink my position.

I think I was being far too lenient in suggesting that you run her down and set her on fire.

On considering her offence I would have run her down but at a speed of 20-25mph. Studies show that at such speeds, most adult pedestrians are merely dazed and suffer severe bruising but do not suffer life threatening injuries unless you get them in a soft spot.

Then I would have guided her to my car, obviously while checking constantly on the condition of my baby twins, on the pretext of taking her to A&E.

I wouldn't take her to hospital though, because people like that are a waste of precious NHS resources.

Instead, I would have taken her to the woods where I would have used the petrol canister from the person who hit me up the arse, and possibly some piano wire from someone who came out of her house to say that her lessons were always being interrupted by random teenagers, to enact horrific but satisfying justice.

But that's just me.

[limitedperiodonly]

the insurance have said I can claim back cost of new car seats.

That was quick.

[WindInThePussyWillows]

Hang on a minute just read all of these back..

Obviously I tended to my twins before anything.. Are you mad!?
It was a car accident we didn't just stop shout and get on our merry way, everyone stopped.
Why is it unbelievable for the driver behind to see her step out and not be able to stop in time?? The majority of people drive around without a safe stopping distance.

How did she hear you with her earplugs in do you really think after something like that happening she would have just stood there listening to music?

If people want to believe people would lie about their children being in a car accident that's messed up.

Feel free to look at my previous posts, recently named changed from PussyWillowss and Possum18.. Have a gander and get a life.

[limitedperiodonly]

The majority of people drive around without a safe stopping distance.

Perhaps so, but they shouldn't. Luckily you did. Unluckily the driver who hit you didn't