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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not understand the parents jetting off on summer hols, but leaving their kids behind??

269 replies

ICoriander · 19/08/2016 15:24

I just really, really don't get it.

Just seen on fb some friends doing the obligatory airport pic before jetting off abroad, whilst their 2 kids (around 8 and 11) are sent off to grandparents for the week. The kids usually spend their whole summer holidays with family so the couple can work, but they always take a week away themselves during that time. I could maybe understand it if they were doing a family holiday abroad, then one on their own, but the kids don't ever go.

Obviously none of my business, but it makes me irrationally angry, as it seems so selfish. I have dc of similar ages, and would never take the opportunity to go on holiday with dh without them; we'd be lost!

Is it just me??

OP posts:
NotYoda · 19/08/2016 17:06

ohdearme

Blimey. That is ironic

Babyzoo · 19/08/2016 17:06

It depends. Personally I wouldn't go for a week abroad without my dc. I'd have a weekend away but I'd even feel guilty about that because ds1 is old enough to want to come.

If the children are having a great time with family then great but if they're being packed off bored then I think it's mean.

I know someone who went to Legoland without his dc, to me that's really cruel.

Doggity · 19/08/2016 17:07

I know I was very traumatised to be "sent to my grandparents". The midnight feasts, cake baking, theatre trips, park days, picnics on the beaches and endless presents did make me feel like I was being punished.

SapphireStrange · 19/08/2016 17:08

I did an advanced search of the OP and it seems her children are registered for boarding school.

Grin Grin Grin

Ragwort · 19/08/2016 17:09

My DS has just gone off for a holiday without DH and I - we are stuck at home - should I feel sad Confused - no, I am happy to have a week of peace and quiet Grin.

Equally I love holidaying with a friend - I leave DH and DS behind and have a thoroughly relaxing time.

Holidays are such an individual thing, some of us love family holidays, some of us find them a strain - there is no 'right or wrong'.

onemorecupofcoffeefortheroad · 19/08/2016 17:13

I wouldn't go on holiday without my kids unless we'd had a family holiday first. No way - I wouldn't want to. My kids are at an age now when they don't want to come with us so I'm glad I did all those family holidays when they were younger - I've got the rest of my life to have holidays without them. YANBU.

NotYoda · 19/08/2016 17:14

They had a family holiday

It's on page 1

HeddaLettuce · 19/08/2016 17:14

I'd be lost as I wouldn't be able to handle the guilt of leaving them behind. My eldest dd saw the pic and was horrified that they were going away without their dc. She said she would be so sad if we ever did that to her. Maybe we've made a rod, but I'm glad she knows she'll never be dumped off whilst I go gallivanting

Shame on you for upsetting your kid for no reason. And for the ridiculous amount of guilt and judgemental poison you've mistaken for caring.
Maybe you should do some gallivanting, might loosen that rod up your ass.

pinkhousesarebest · 19/08/2016 17:16

Laughing at the Swallows and Amazons reference. Most definitely not with my parents.

NotYoda · 19/08/2016 17:16

But do they take their kids on holiday?
Yes, they all had a week off and did a couple of days camping with friends, and days out to the local seaside etc

mum2Bomg · 19/08/2016 17:16

It's a healthy thing to do and if it helps your marriage then it's good for your family...and also none of your business. They probably think you're friends whilst you are judging them from (I would imagine) Facebook posts.

mum2Bomg · 19/08/2016 17:17

Lol NotYoda

passmethewineplease · 19/08/2016 17:17

YABU. Why the hell cant they spend a week away alone from their DC? It's a week out of what? 18 years?

God forbid they try and have a nice time without their DC.

FWIW we had five days in Spain when DD was 3, we had had a shit year and someone paid for us both to go.

DD is still pretty traumatised from the late nights, dinners out and trips to the park.

The kids have been on holiday, they're now safe and being looked after by loving family?

Where's the issue?

Also why is it when anyone disagrees with someone else babysitting your children we use the term dump?

Drama llamas.

mum2Bomg · 19/08/2016 17:19

I'm going to Glastonbury next year for four days - what an awful person I am...

HeddaLettuce · 19/08/2016 17:19

I did an advanced search of the OP and it seems her children are registered for boarding school

HA! I see that too. Seems OP would be entirely lost at being without her DC for a WEEK, but not for the entire school YEAR?
Chinny reckon.

NotYoda · 19/08/2016 17:22

Full boarding, mind, not weekly boarding. Full boarding

ohdearme1958 · 19/08/2016 17:23

I've reported the thread even though I'm having a good laugh.

NotYoda · 19/08/2016 17:24

Good idea

LavenderEverywhere · 19/08/2016 17:24

The kids are 8 and 11. Most people would love it if they could have a child free week away and send kids of that age to the GPs. I am only bewildered that they chose to do it in the summer holidays when everywhere will be full of other people's kids and double the price.

Perhaps they've had a family holiday as well?

LavenderEverywhere · 19/08/2016 17:26

She said she would be so sad if we ever did that to her. Maybe we've made a rod, but I'm glad she knows she'll never be dumped off whilst I go gallivanting

Well I suppose if your kids are registered to go full boarding then you can do plenty of gallivanting the rest of the year without them seeing or knowing about it, can't you?

NotYoda · 19/08/2016 17:26

Lavender

It's on page one:

But do they take their kids on holiday?
Yes, they all had a week off and did a couple of days camping with friends, and days out to the local seaside etc

ohdearme1958 · 19/08/2016 17:31

I am only bewildered that they chose to do it in the summer holidays when everywhere will be full of other people's kids and double the price

Perhaps the imaginary couple can afford to travel whenever they want to places where there aren't lots of children.

LavenderEverywhere · 19/08/2016 17:32

But the OP is making it sound as if the never go anywhere. Perhaps this is a special anniversary and on other years they always go away en famille. Perhaps the children have been off to summer camp for a week and the mother just failed to announce it on facebook? Perhaps they are going to Disneyworld Florida for October half term or Christmas, or perhaps they went somewhere fabulous at Easter?

Also the OP said 'She [DD] said she would be so sad if we ever did that to her.'

Well perhaps she might want to think on the fact that lots and lots, in fact probably most children would feel exactly the same about being packed off to boarding school.

Horses for courses, people in glass houses, etc etc.

NotYoda · 19/08/2016 17:33

Perhaps they do it in the Summer holidays to rub it in.

ohdearme1958 · 19/08/2016 17:37

But the OP is making it sound as if the never go anywhere

I think the OP is having a laugh. Or words to that effect.

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