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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU ,dd of to uni we are skint...AIBU to think the student lone will cover her for everything???

259 replies

Petal40 · 19/08/2016 11:34

Just that really...she's not saved.we are struggling .she chose to save to travel.not save for uni.she thinks it's all going to be ok because she will get a student lone....but will that lone cover everything?? And when she finishes she will be £60 grand approx in debt ...well our first house where she was born cost less than the debt she will be in after 3 years..I hope to god she changes her mind and decides not to go

OP posts:
AndNowItsSeven · 19/08/2016 18:02

No trifle I am not trying to make anyone feel bad. I am not posting to the op!!
It's logical that if a loan is reduced due to parental income they are expected to make up the difference.
It's not " a nice thing to do" it's what the government expects of parents. If it wasn't why would estranged young people receive maximum student loan.

Trifleorbust · 19/08/2016 18:03

Absy: Assuming they will pay the loan back, I have no issue with what more well-off students do with money they choose to borrow, any more than I would have an issue with them taking out a bank loan. What is clearly unfair, though, is expecting people to subsidise their children at university when they can't afford it. They aren't children anymore but adults, so should be able to make independent financial decisions and either take out a full loan, or not.

user1471428758 · 19/08/2016 18:03

But it can't "cover everything", due to differences in fees for different courses, living expenses in different parts of the country, what type of accommodation the student chooses - etc. What should be covered and what should be left out? Should no student have to work? Do you think the student should have all of it handed to them on a plate?

If so, how is that being "treated like an adult"? The OP can't insist that her child is treated like an adult, while demanding that all her education and living expenses should be paid for by "the government". Because adults support themselves.

Trifleorbust · 19/08/2016 18:04

Seven: Honestly, you come across here as if you are trying to tell someone who doesn't have the money to help her child that she needs to, regardless of ability to pay. Maybe just think about how others might be reading your comments.

user1471428758 · 19/08/2016 18:06

Absy: Assuming they will pay the loan back, I have no issue with what more well-off students do with money they choose to borrow, any more than I would have an issue with them taking out a bank loan.

Trifle - do you actually understand how the paying back of student loans works? Because it doesn't appear that you do. It seems that you think all student loans are paid back in full within a specified period like a bank loan. They are not.

www.moneysavingexpert.com/students/student-loans-tuition-fees-changes

Trifleorbust · 19/08/2016 18:07

User: Then all loans should cover a certain proportion of overall course expenses and accommodation, with the remainder to be covered by the adult student working or by parental contributions, if appropriate. I don't see what's so tricky about that. The point is that the parental income is no longer of relevance, because the student is an adult.

AndNowItsSeven · 19/08/2016 18:07

No I am posting to you , not the op.
However if the op's dd is not entitled to the maximum loan then she does have the money. The op made different choices on how to spend her money, high mortgage for example.

Trifleorbust · 19/08/2016 18:07

Yes, user, I get the concept. Done now, as you seem determined to be a bit rude here and I can't be bothered. Friday

Trifleorbust · 19/08/2016 18:08

Seven, same to you. You are being nasty and should be ashamed, but I am done.

AndNowItsSeven · 19/08/2016 18:10

"If you're a dependent student your income and your parents' income is assessed. You're classed as a dependent student if you're under 25 years old and depend on your parents' financial support."

Copied from slc , it's pretty clear parents are expected to contribute.

babbafishbabe · 19/08/2016 18:12

I only had my loans but I had a job too. I worked 3 nights from 5-10 and Saturdays 8-4 in a insurance call centre. Paid well and got me through Uni!!!
I'd start applying now!

MrsBrent · 19/08/2016 18:20

It's wrong to expect parents to contribute.
Some don't want to
Some can't (commitments elsewhere, other dc at uni) despite it saying on paper saying they 'can'.
Obviously the majority of parents do contribute and want to, but it's not a sweeping statement.

PersianCatLady · 19/08/2016 18:47

Have you looked at the Open University? I highly recommend it
The OU have changed their pricing structure and funding recently.

Each year of study with the OU now costs £5,572 (full-time for 3 years) or £2,786 (part-time for 6 years).

One good thing is though that you can get a loan to cover these fees.

However by studying with the OU the OP's DD would not receive any maintenance loan at all.

So maybe a better idea would be for her to go to uni but live at home??

scaryteacher · 19/08/2016 20:00

You can have a loan that covers everything, but either taxes rise to pay for that, or we restrict participation to make it affordable, or, we make the loans like mortgages, and they HAVE to be paid off at a set amount each month, irrespective of earning levels.

I would go for the second option, as lots of those I taught weren't suited to university and would have struggled, yet they were encouraged to go on.

scaryteacher · 19/08/2016 20:02

I also object to the student applying for the loan, and them being the only ones the SLC will talk to, but the parents are expected to supply all their financial details to their child so they can fill in the form. Stuff that.

smallfox2002 · 19/08/2016 20:04

Its not wrong to expect parents to contribute at all. If you are above a certain income you will be able to find some way of contributing, as someone outlined above, but its not wrong to expect parents to help.

The new loan system has been going for at least 4 years so you've had a chance of saving up a bit of cash to help.

Just think about it this way, who is going to be making the decisions about which old folks home you go into..

madgingermunchkin · 19/08/2016 20:07

You are not being unreasonable.

She is now an adult, and if she has decided to blow all the money she saved on travelling without finding out how much little loan she's going to get, and budgeting for it, then it's a life lesson for her

Just means she'll have to defer for a second year to earn more money to fund herself through.

smallfox2002 · 19/08/2016 20:12

"She is now an adult"

No, she's not, till she is 25 she is a dependent in the eyes of student finance.

If she were an independent adult of 25 or over the parents income isn't taken into account.

OrsonWellsHat · 19/08/2016 20:12

Well, she'll have to get a job like I did.

SaintsFever · 19/08/2016 20:13

Please please don't let her rely on an overdraft facility. While it's interesting free while studying the amount of student last I've then seen end up in financial difficulties 12/18 months later due to the interest that they forget has started to accrue is heartbreaking.

smallfox2002 · 19/08/2016 20:18

Getting a job is fine if you are in a big city university, its much more difficult if you are in a smaller town, the competition is fierce.

madgingermunchkin · 19/08/2016 20:43

Yes she is an adult. I'm not talking about in the eyes of student finance.

I'm talking about in terms of planning her life. Christ, she can get married, go to war, have baby. She's more than capable of planning what's her best course of options and whether she can afford to go travelling and still afford uni.

smallfox2002 · 19/08/2016 20:52

Why shouldn't she go traveling? If she worked for it and saved for it?

Sadly parents are now expected to contribute, it has been that way for a long time, since the introductions of loans and fees way back in 1999.

This doesn't sound like the DD has poorly planned it, she has worked to save up the money for travelling, did her parents tell her that she would need to save for uni?

MN is a funny place sometimes, Student DC are adults and shouldn't get any help, and then there's another thread about cutting one off because he's had a fag.

Fine choose not to help your DC through Uni, claim you are broke, but if the facts weren't clear about you not being able to help them, or if you let them go and don't make any attempt to help by changing lifestyles a bit, don't expect to have a good relationship with them afterwards.

lucyandpoppy123 · 19/08/2016 21:06

to the person that said upthread that grants don't exist anymore - really??
I'm still at Uni (my first year was in 2013, have had DC since then) I'm getting grants this year. My partner is starting Uni this year and will be getting grants too. So will they be stopped next year? Genuinely shocked if thats the case and they will be stopped when OP's DD goes next year.

greenfolder · 19/08/2016 21:17

My earlier post was misleading and I didn't realise that posters daughter would not get full loan. In years 1 and 2 of dds degree her loan covered her accommodation in London and gave her about £50 a week. We gave her 35 a week term time.in year 3 it didn't cover her rent so we paid the shortfall about £400 a term and gave her £75 a week term time. She worked in various jobs throughout. We did funded out of income. She did have friends from school who qualified for grants as well as loans and they managed fine on these.i did not appreciate that they had been stopped. I couldn't agree more that it is stupid that it is assessed on parents income
As you have 4 then realistic expectation sets in. If the loan will cover rent then realistically contribute what she costs at home now and she will have to fund the shortfall. Whilst London was pricey on the plus side dd always found work and first eggs earned £8.50 an hour in boots, so 20 hours a week gave her more disposable income than me.