To have told this kid to go back to his parents?

[PeachesAndDerek]

Met up with DH for lunch today. Idea was we'd have a nice hour to ourselves to sit and enjoy a coffee and a bite to eat. As we arrived so did another family, two adults, a boy around 5ish and a baby. So DH and I start chatting, lovely conversation until this boy comes across and shows us his new toy. "That's nice!" I say with a smile and then turn back to DH to carry on our conversation. The boy then starts trying to climb up on one of the chairs at our table, all the while knocking the table all over and splashing our drinks around. I looked across at his parents and the gormless woman smiled and said to her husband "aww look at him with that couple!". Now by this point I'm getting irritated, DH is losing interest in our conversation and has started playing in his phone as I have become preoccupied with trying to stop this kid from falling off the chair whilst trying to save what's left of our drinks. In the end I say to him "don't climb on there, that's your table over there" and point to his parents. He ignores me and starts playing with his car on the table. I look across at his parents, both having a nice conversation just like the one DH and I WERE having so out of pure frustration I picked the kid up, took him to his parents and said "sorry I'm just worried he's going to fall off the chair of spill coffee on himself" and leave him. The kid starts screaming, the parents get all flustered and DH decides to call it a day and go back to work!!! Be honest wibu here?? I'm still irritated by the whole thing now

YANBU but...

I'm going to disagree with the majority on your DH's behaviour. There were two ways to react to this situation without engaging the parents (something you were not inclined to do yourself to begin with) - ignore the child and hope he gets the message or engage and hope the parents intervene. You DH simply took the other approach. A friend and I were out recently on a picnic with our children, another child (parent nowhere to be seen) of about 8 yo came and joined us (actually sat on our picnic blanket!). She chatted to us and there was no parent to intervene. We both (my friend and I - our children were playing nearby as we were at the park) got out our phones and only engaged in the minimum amount not to be totally rude. The child got the message and left. I also don't blame your DH for deciding to leave, your lovely lunch had already been ruined.

I think you were not being unreasonable to pick up the child. Dh sounds like a syphilitic ham dragon for acting like that (does he get jealous of the attention you give dc?) it isn't just your responsibility to ensure you two have a nice time. If you had gone over to his parents and their precious gollum had fell of the chair or broke a glass (because it sounds like Dh was too busy googling how to be an inconsiderate cockwomble manchild in one easy step) and cut himself, things could have been much worse. If anything if it did give the little one a little shock maybe it will stop him impinging on strangers in future because obviously his parents aren't teaching him that. I am all for kids have developmental opportunities but shouldn't this be with kids their own age or in appropriate settings such as play groups. Teaching your child to wonder off with strangers as long as they look nice and engage them a little is damn right neglectful. Nevermind the fact that what if he had toddled under one of the servers with hot coffee and got burnt? Yanbu!

If the kid was scared by being picked up by a stranger then it will probably have done them good. Their parents are useless and won't teach them not to bother people so maybe being picked up will put them off doing it in future.

I think if you hate people so much that you think it is rude for them to talk to you that perhaps you should never leave your home.

Are you seriously suggesting that anyone who doesn't want random strangers coming up to them and bugging them for no good reason should have to never leave the house??

That just because a person is in public you have the right to force your company on them?

That's insane, and I'm glad most people don't think like you. I don't want anyone I don't know sitting at my table forcing themselves on me whether is an adult, a child, a dog or a Martian for that matter. An adult who did this would be rude, and an adult who lets their child do this is also being rude.

I think if you hate people so much that you think it is rude for them to talk to you that perhaps you should never leave your home.

Because it is hating people to want a moment to breathe. She has her own dc to look after it isn't her responsibility to entertain others.

One time when I was almost 17 I got stuck babysitting a little kid the entire way to Florida. She wouldn't leave me alone. The last straw was when she snatched a cuddly toy I had in my bag and ran down the cabin with it, then tried to follow me into the loo! I was NOT happy as all I wanted to do was watch the films!

Wisley yesterday...children using trays in the cafe as toboggans!Mothers did not blink.

I love children and like to watch them play and get up to nonsense as long as they don't bash into me or scream loudly.

DH not so much.His' weapon' is an antique walking stick with a goose head.It hisses viciously with an open beak when a button is pushed.He is sometimes severely scolded by upset mothers when children run off howling. Could not give a fig , as he will tell them.

YANBU I don't particularly want to talk to random adults when I'm having a coffee / lunch / drink, why on earth would I want to speak to random children?

I have pointedly sent small children back to their parents, including one who was playing 'waiter' in a fucking cocktail bar.

My friends DC used to do this when we were out for group lunches. She used to think it was so cute that he wanted to show the other tables his toys and I was cringing on her behalf.

I think if you hate people so much that you think it is rude for them to talk to you that perhaps you should never leave your home.

Alternatively you could respect other people's space and parent your own children properly.