To want Nanny to speak all German to kids?

[mika2]

German Nanny (fluent English) starts next month 4 days a week (8-6pm) and I think it's a great opportunity for kids to learn German. They are 3 and 1. Nanny said she was happy to do so during interview. I have very rusty conversational German and also plan to practice my German. I would like her to only speak to kids in German from day 1 and read German books, sing songs in German, watch German cartoons on iPad etc with the aim of them having a good understanding of the language this time next year, rather than just knowing colours etc. Anyway DH thinks it's crazy and kids will be very confused etc. He vetoed putting this in her contract and doesn't see having a second language as a priority whereas I feel really strongly about it... Just to be clear I didn't deliberately hire her because she is German, we liked her and it was an added bonus. Who is BU?

I'm raising 2 bilingual children (well the little one is preverbal) and I think it doesn't particularly matter unless you have a long-term serious commitment to your children speaking German.

Bilingualism is a lot more difficult than people think. You hear a lot that children are like 'sponges' and will pick up another language with ease, which is true to a certain extent but also really misrepresents the level of effort it takes to foster and maintain a minority language. Children will take the path of least resistance in this, always, so unless they genuinely need a linguistic skill they will lose it. Children 'want' to be monolingual if they can get away with it, they don't have the maturity to understand the long-term benefits.

They won't get confused particularly, although the adjustment will be a little harder for your 3 year old, and this arrangement will almost certainly get them bilingual to a certain extent. But they'll lose it as soon as the need disappears and the pressure from the majority language (English in your case) will be absolutely huge as soon as they start school, at which point it will require a massive effort from you to maintain the German.

I tend to think that unless there are natural reasons for bilingualism it's all a bit contrived. We are a bilingual family because DP and I are from different countries and we don't live in the UK. The benefits are both practical and emotional since half my children's family only speak English and their parents have different native languages.

I would take any claim that it will make your child more intelligent or whatever with a huge pinch of salt. The benefits of speaking two languages are that you can speak to people who also speak those languages (and read / watch stuff in those languages), that's it. All the 'brain benefits' are very over-egged in my opinion, and based on research that doesn't really hold up. So I don't agree with people who say it's still positive to learn a bit of a language and then totally forget it. www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2016/02/the-battle-over-bilingualism/462114/

Monolingual people are not inferior in any way.

Will you be happy if your DC speak to eachother in German and you don't understand?
My DC are bilingual as we are expats in the UK, and their English has been taught exclusively by their British nanny. She spoke to them in English from day 1 and they picked it up in a matter of days.
They understand to speak English to her and our other language to their dad and myself.
But since recently I noticed that they speak mostly English to eachother. Which is strange to me - but understandable.

I was brought up bilingual Greek/English and one of the tricks my mum used was to hire an English speaking nanny and tell us children that she did not speak any Greek. It was a lie but it worked really well, she was a lovely nanny and I still remember her fondly.

We are a Greek/German family, living in France and the DCs speak English/French. My 6yo surprises us with how much Greek she understands even though we have not actively taught her. The more languages the better. It helps develop the brain, it's a good way of understanding other cultures and can come in handy for traveling and work in future.

I'd have to ask why? I understand the desire for French/Spanish but chances are the dc won't study German at school and it's nowhere near as widely spoken as other languages.

If you or your husband plan to to continue it and speak to them in german then YANBU. Are you planning to use it in your daily life/move to germany/german speaking country?

If not - then YABU - why would you want to confuse them for? Unless you are native speakers and are going to continue talking to them in german - this is a little bizarre (IMO). Sorry OP, but i just don't see the point, people saying they learned a different language when young and then promptly forgot it when older as well - i would listen to them.

Zombieeeee

So the German Nanny wasn't happy then?

using a nanny as a means for you to learn a language is really taking advantage and a cheek. she is not a governess and not paid to teach your children another language. you seem to have be confused as a role of a nanny and a governess. why would you employ a nanny to speak germany to children who do not know german unless she intends to only speak to them in germany and how is that going to work if they are english speaking? are they learning at school = it is not going to build a good rapport and seems extremely outrageous.

I’m for it..

It’s a brilliant opportunity, but I guess I’m biased because I speak to my children in German sometimes. They never speak back but understand every word. I also had a conversation in french with my 7 year old over dinner yesterday. (My french skills are purely conversational though)

One of my friends earns a fucking fortune speaking to the Spanish clients of a very big company.

(Were in uk)

You've missed the boat. If you want bi lingual kids it needs to be done from birth. I have several friends from other countries with bi lingual children but its because mum speaks to them continuously in her language and has done from birth. and dad speaks in English.

ARE YOU for real? you seem very confused. so if you know it all then why did you post on here?
yes bilingual families mean that one of them speaks that language... yes there are families that want to introduce a language , but they do that from baby age and the ones that do it from any other age, depending on the age, sure they do it but those parents are not what I call warm hearted loving kind parents who are thiking about their kids, they are just selfish and thinking about what they want.

exactly.

I was an au pair many years ago in Switzerland. Family was French speaking, although the dad's family were part German. The 3 year old boy I looked after obviously spoke French, but also spoke German to one set of grandparents and aunties. I was asked to speak only English with him, which worked really well. His English wasn't perfect but it was good, and sometimes he asked me to say things in French when the English wasn't working, or I'd talk in English and he'd reply in French. But by the time I left when he was 4 1/2, he was pretty much trilingual. Small children don't get confused, they can usually take it in their stride. The ground rules for us were that I spoke French to the parents, to improve my French (although when it was just me and mum, she spoke English because she wanted to practice) and the boy and I were MEANT to talk English, but French wasn't banned if we were struggling, but then we had to go back to English when any communication difficulty was over.

erm - this thread is two and a half years OLD everyone - I'm guessing the OP has long gone

Some people above have no clue- it's an amazing opportunity, and will enhance your children's ability to learn other languages in future. You don't need to live in Germany to use the language!

@Cutesbabasmummy - not true. You can become bilingual later on as well. I have many bilingual or even trilingual friends, some learned the second or third language as teenagers and adults. They gaines exposure and put a lot of hard work into it, but you would not tell a difference. So please, if you have no clue about foreign language acquisition, don't post silly, ignorant comments.

Lady Renoir I think you are the ignorant one! I speak 5 lamguages and gave a degree which included a section on language aquistion! So keep your ignorant comments to yourself!