would you believe ds (5) or the childminder? childminer took ds and the children elsewhere

[user1469643462]

It is the summer holidays so ds has to be with a childminer, for 3 days a week. I pay her for the actual care she provides, then i pay for any visits to places on top of that, they were supposed to be going to the zoo today and i had paid £21 for ds's zoo ticket and i know that isnt loads but tbh with the cost i had already paid for her to look after him it was almost today's wages! ds goes there with 2 boys and a little girl aswell all around the same age give or take. Ds got home and was telling me all about his trip to the local museum (which was free) i did not have a problem with that he seemed to have had a great time. I phoned up the childminder and asked if she could just paypal the money back over and she said that she had no idea what i was going on about and that she took them to the zoo I know children do love to use their imagination, so i was a bit undecided, ds kept going on about the objects he had seen and told me a story about a man showing them the kids bit. ds has never been to this museum and it was just odd how well he was explaining it. I would love to phone the other parents but tbh i dont actually know them! it's all very odd...

Op - Have you decided what to do?

Sounds as if trust has broken down so it's time to call it a day with this childminder. And £21 costs for visit to zoo sounds a lot. I think I'd believe your DS but would want further confirmation. If she's actually lied to pocket £21 extra money this is very bad indeed.

So the CM didn't give you the ticket stub from the zoo then? I was a nanny\CM and I would make sure to give the parents the bills or whatever when I'd taken their dcs out, then either they 'd pay me afterwards or I'd give them change back from their money. It is a bit suspicious.

There isn't a museumy part of Chester Zoo

I don't know what to think. I know my seven year olds still have a loose grasp of timescales and my four year old uses 'yesterday' for any timescale that has already happened. However, the 7 year olds still talk enthusiastically about our trip to Chester Zoo and they were only three last time they went with us (dinosaur exhibit mainly!).

I don't know what I'd do but I'd be very uncomfortable with it.

Orchids definetly funny... More so when met with "this is serious you know!!!" yes it is serious because I'm pretty sure that tiger has been wearing a very nice lipstick that doesn't belong to him

I am actually now very much overinvested in this thread so hope we do hear an update from the OP

I would discuss with the childminder - not from an accusatory point of view, just from the weirdness of children angle.

Berries yes, good point about a dream. I lean towards either something from TV or something one of his fiends told him.

I'm hoping for an outcome here where the CM is honest and OP's DS was just unexpectedly moe impressed by the indoors areas. But hopefully OP will be able to find out for sure for her peace of mind.

People advising to ask for the tickets... I think it's too late for that, she'll just say that she's thrown them away as they hadn't said that they'll need them before, not gonna prove anything. Unless of course they did actually go and she still has them.

*friends not fiends! (Though "fiends" not an entirely inaccurate description for some of them...)

Dainty No I NEVER did that. If she'd lost them then surely she's have said so.

Hmm tricky.

I like this suggestion Say he enjoyed the zoo so much he wants to go back on Saturday to show you around so can she just confirm which one they went to?

When we go to Chester Zoo we walk past the elephants first.. There's no way he could have missed them.

I agree with minimonkey. Could well be talking about the zoo's new islands bit. Sometimes you hardly see the animals.

Last time DD went the only thing she talked about afterwards was the bloody monorail!

Fucking hell. The people who are stating categorically they believe a third-hand account about a bathroom lock-in, you seriously need to turn down any requests for jury service.

I haven't seen anything categorical about the bathroom issue

I would talk to her face to face whilst ds is there tomorrow when you drop him off.

When ds was in reception year, he told me he slept in class most days. Because his teacher said he looked tired and did he want a nap. So when he yawned, he was allowed to just get into the bed and sleep. I did question him as to where the bed was, as I didn't see one in there ever. He told me that she made him a lovely comfy bed under her desk with pillows, explained the duvet cover and everything.

So naturally I went to see the teacher, I did believe her side when I saw the look on her face when I told her was ds had told me.

He finally admitted some time later that he never actually slept in class, ever.....

I work with children
They are more than capable of getting things muddled

I once had a complaint from a parent that her child had gone home complaining a particular child was hitting her every day and that we were allowing him to do it
I asked her if she was sure her child wasn't making things up as we hadn't seen any incidents of bullying
She insisted her child was always truthful and never lied
Which was a worry for us as we then had to tell the parent that her daughter had told us she was locked in a cupboard while her parents went to the shop, so we would have to report it as a safeguarding concern

Insancerre What did she say?

Kittens 😂😂😂 at the naughty tiger stealing your lipstick!

Nothing!
Just backed down completely and said of course she didn't lock her in the cupboard
I said, OK, and she's not being bullied either

She did owe fees so I think she was looking for anything to complain about so she wouldn't have to pay

bograinger I know people were talking as if they knew better than I did and it was my minded child.

How can you be sure of that, JeanGenie?

I think everyone agrees that young children can get muddled and report things that never happened. (Museum visit)

What's more unusual is for a young child to report absolutely nothing about something that supposedly did happen. (Zoo trip)

mathanxiety because I know the family, I know the child, and I have been a cm for over 10yrs so I trust my own judgement. Children tell tales, it happens, not every story they tell is true

I agree Koala. Also, if I was the CM, when OP had said something to me I would have actually been shocked and laughed about it and then told OP all the things we saw at the zoo and how I had a lovely photo of Ds petting a sheep etc but the CM just seemed to brush it off quite bluntly.