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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you say something?

142 replies

Zosebrina · 26/07/2016 10:56

I am having some work done on my house, specifically my upstairs bathroom.

The person doing the work is a friend of one of my relatives and I wasn't able to stay home today to let them in etc so I gave a key to a relative who then gave a key to the tradesman, they have had work done before and It's very good. I was a bit nervous about giving some random person a key but my relative assured me he is totally trustworthy and has been alone in their house doing work lots of times.

Before I left for work this morning I shut all the doors to the bedrooms upstairs and the living room.

I have a burglar alarm linked to my phone and motion sensors in all the downstairs rooms, a contact sensor on the back door and motion sensors in all the upstairs bedrooms (I live on my own and have been burgled before incase anyone thinks I'm a bit OTT with the sensors!)

I can look at the motion sensor activity from my phone and just popped to have a look just to see if he had turned up to do the work.

So far he has spent 3/4 an hour in the kitchen (presumably having a coffee - fine by me), has gone outside into the garden (or at least opened the back door) has gone in the living room and all the upstairs bedrooms...

I'm trying to workout why on earth he felt the need to go in any of the bedrooms when the doors were shut? He wouldn't have been looking for the bathroom because I left that door open and you have to walk past it to get to the bedrooms so he would have seen it immediately as he walked up the stairs.
I can sort of understand him going in the living room, perhaps he wanted to sit with a coffee on the sofa but the bedrooms?? I am a bit annoyed that he has gone in there because I have cream carpets in all the bedrooms and obviously he wouldn't have taken his shoes off to do work.

IABU to feel a bit unnerved that he has gone into my bedrooms when there was no need? Should I say something?

OP posts:
NavyandWhite · 27/07/2016 08:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Iamworried2016 · 27/07/2016 08:56

I think this is awful. I regularly go to my bosses house, have been doing so for over 3 years and not once have I ever looked in the bedrooms or walked around the house. I have done what I'm there to do only and then left.

I don't know if they have sensors or any such like but I always behave as if they can see what I'm doing.. and to be honest if I had a trademan here and I wasn't and he was poking about I would confront him and want to know why.

Twink · 27/07/2016 19:21

Many years ago I mentioned to the guys at work that I was having work done on the house. They were appalled that I'd left a guy there alone, all convinced that he'd be checking out my knicker drawer and worse. I was flabbergasted and Hmm but they were deadly serious...

Bumpasaurusmumma · 27/07/2016 19:33

Just a suggestion but could be have been opening the windows to air the house due to fumes/heat? It's been boiling here and opening ALL of our windows upstairs has really helped to keep the house a bit cooler.

Notimefortossers · 27/07/2016 19:42

So did you say anything OP?

KinkyAfro · 27/07/2016 19:47

RTFT Bump

SexLubeAndAFishSlice · 27/07/2016 19:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Kayleigh2409 · 27/07/2016 19:58

What did you do OP? Dying to know x

crazybat · 27/07/2016 19:58

Could he have needed to open the windows?

Chewbecca · 27/07/2016 20:00

I think he was most likely having a look round out of nosiness.

I always leave workmen in my house alone, DH & I are both at work and we'd never get anything done if we thought we needed to be home anytime a tradesperson was there.

They may well have had a look or whatever that they didn't need to but what I don't know doesn't bother me so I just stick to did they do the job, how well & how much. I do think you're making life harder for yourself by knowing too much tbh.

HarryPottersMagicWand · 27/07/2016 20:05

I can't believe people here have openly admitted they would nose around others houses if they were there alone. And the there are the blatant bullshit excuses of windows opening, radiator bleeding (for tiling), socket finding to charge an ipod, checking if someone was in in an empty house they had the key to, looking to see room sizes or decor! Don't make me laugh. Unfortunately there are only 2 reasons he would have had a look in all the bedrooms and I remember that chat thread well too. Certainly made me think twice about leaving a tradesman alone again!

EagleRay · 27/07/2016 20:14

I used to be fairly trusting of workmen and would let them come and go as they pleased... Until I had a pant stealer!!!

dollylucy · 27/07/2016 20:24

Oh dear
I've just left builder with a key
If I found out he'd been in the bedrooms I would not be happy

blowmybarnacles · 27/07/2016 21:58

Just being nose I guess. Have you agreed a price for the job? He may be sizing up how much you are worth before charging?

theelectricmichaelangelo · 27/07/2016 22:47

So do the sensors actually detect he has walked across the bedroom or just opened the door? Could it be he just opened the door to have a look in out of curiosity and walked away again? If he saw they they were all closed - then maybe curiosity as to why they were closed got the better of him? After all - usually when you go into someones house they don't leave all the doors closed. At least I only do that if I am going on holiday and don't want my cats sleeping all over the beds otherwise they are open.

I see why you are upset - it must feel like an invasion of privacy and disturbing to wonder why. But maybe its just human nosiness/curiosity rather than something sinister. I guess you will only really know if you ask him.

The other thing I did wonder was how accurate your technology is? Could there be another explanation for the sensor going off? Also - how do you actually know its him going into your bedrooms - the sensor only detects the movement. Could it have been the relative who let him in?

Its not like you have absolute picture proof it was him in the bedrooms. Be careful how you approach this.

EZA15 · 27/07/2016 23:09

Place Marking Cake

BillyNotQuiteNoMates · 27/07/2016 23:21

OP! Where are you! I need to know if you asked him!!

ImperialBlether · 27/07/2016 23:27

I need to know, too!

Ilovetorrentialrain · 27/07/2016 23:55

Sorry if someone else has suggested this but...

Imagine if you're working in an unfamiliar house, not been shown around by the owner, just let yourself in with the key, on a landing where all doors are closed (except the one to the room you're working in). I imagine there might be a strong desire just to open the doors (not go in the rooms) just to check you really are alone, or to throw more light onto the hall. Just a thought.

Ilovetorrentialrain · 27/07/2016 23:57

Also did the relative definitely not go to your house too (and perhaps open the doors)?

TesticleMeElmo · 28/07/2016 07:31

Come OP, tell us what happened!!!!!

mixety · 28/07/2016 07:51

I'm always interested to see people's homes so would instantly just think he wanted to see the rooms out of curiosity / idle interest. It's just rude because you purposefully closed the doors. But essentially not a massively awful thing to do, presuming all he did is look into the rooms briefly? I wouldn't really care myself. I think I'd be more annoyed about all the time wasting hanging around in the kitchen and living room (unless it works out overall as fair lunchbreak time relative to the overall time spent actually doing the job in the bathroom).

TesticleMeElmo · 28/07/2016 08:15

I can't help but feel that if it was chucking it down (as OP has already said) then maybe the poor bloke was just opening the doors to let a bit more light in upstairs? Maybe OP should actually ask him and get back to us before we all start accusing him of snooping, stealing, and cracking one out in her laundry basket...?

Laiste · 28/07/2016 08:27

not a massively awful thing to do, presuming all he did is look into the rooms briefly?

We don't know that's all he did. Plus: I don't know, where do you draw the line with nosiness being harmless? I think if, as a professional at work, you've been given the key to someone's home and they've placed their trust in you opening closed doors around the house to 'have a look' is not on. It's about privacy and crossing a line. Would it be ok to open a couple of draws and cupboards on the way through the house just for a quick look? Read any letters he sees laying about? If not; what's the difference? Genuinely.

OP only knows the doors were opened. She's left now wondering what he did or didn't do.

CPtart · 28/07/2016 08:44

Hopefully awaiting update......

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