Men With Their Tops Off In Public Places because it's hot.

[EverySongbirdSays]

Was in ASDA and this bloke just walking round doing his shopping with no top on, belly hanging over shorts. Yes, it's hot and what not but it's just such male privilege.

If a woman walked around in just her bra because it's so hot, she'd be body shamed and cat called and possibly even assaulted and told she'd "asked for it"

And yet men can go around comfy while we suffer. The injustice!!

majestic thank you for that delightful image

Pretty hot in London, hope to god this doesn't happen anytime soon on a tube or the above may well be reality for some poor sod

It's rancid. Absolutely rancid. Note that men in actually hot countries don't feel the need to do this. I don't want to see people's flesh unless on a beach. Sweaty moobs have no place in the supermarket. Its always a certain type...and yes I do mean that in a snobbish sense. Don't care.

"Was in ASDA and this bloke just walking round doing his shopping with no top on, belly hanging over shorts.Yes, it's hot and what not but it's just such male privilege.

If a woman walked around in just her bra because it's so hot, she'd be body shamed and cat called and possibly even assaulted and told she'd "asked for it"

OP, you should embace this

embrace FFS

On a beach or by the pool, fine. In a shop/supermarket or café/restaurant, not fine.

Many restaurants in hot countries insist upon suitably-clothed clientele. It appears to be a peculiarly British thing, to walk about in public scantily-clad. Several years ago the security guard in our local supermarket insisted a man put a t-shirt on before he was allowed entry. The customer did kick off, but the security guard was quite adamant.

I can't bear this heat, really can't - yet it wouldn't occur to me to do shopping or eat somewhere whilst wearing only a bikini top, or the boys to go topless. (I'm chubby, but the rest of the family aren't - this is irrelevant, really - just mentioning as some people seem fixated on fat, sweaty bodies). Even when sitting on a beach, if we go to buy an ice-cream from a kiosk, we wear a light cover-up to do so. It's a matter of hygiene, and respect for others, I think.

twit someone already pointed that out and I already responded.

Love the name Alconleigh and yes, I agree

tigermoll
I'm not writing about body consciousness, more about the assumption some men have that they can display like this, using the weather as some excuse, and fuck you lot, because they are more important than anyone else.

Probably not explaining very well, and I realise this thread was so easily going to go towards the body shaming thing, but I think the whole issue relates to an arrogance that some men feel entitled to behave in this way, a manner they would definitely object to if their partners/mums/sisters etc did the same.

YANBU. I've seen way too many shirtless men over the past few days. I have no logical reason for why it shouldn't be allowed so actually we're probably both BU but I hate it anyway.

Besides anything else, a loose-fitting shirt/dress/skirt creates a lovely breeze around you. I wouldn't give that up even if I could!

All this talk of the grossness of seeing nipples and body hair...it seems weird, considering we're mammals, that the passing sight of these two important, nay defining, body features should cause us all to shy like startled horses :)

Damnit, there's a time and a place to be in possession of a normal, mammalian body and that place is NOT IN PUBLIC, THANK YOU. Hide your shame, please, so I can go on considering everyone I see to be smooth plastic from the neck down. Otherwise I might get an attack of the vapours.

Its always a certain type...and yes I do mean that in a snobbish sense. Don't care

At least you're honest

Ifailed is saying what I meant so much better than me his belly or lack of it isn't the issue, it's the difference in allowed/accepted

People might look at the guy and think "gross put it away" but if it was a woman they'd actually get "GROSS! PUT IT AWAY! SLUT!"

Yeah to be fair I read the OP and responded as it seemed hypocritical. And whilst not strictly the same I think a bikini is mostly the same and many do wear bikinis, some women that are seen as naturally beautiful and some that aren't, same as men. And the point that you pointed out his belly and others have made remarks means that people still make judgements about men, and I'd say most men probably don't feel comfortable walking with their shirts off like women with bikinis. And some do have comments made.

I still think women work out better overall I look at men in suite and ties and whimper in sympathy, I look at women and they have many more work friendly/ leisure summery options.

I feel offended when I see a man walking around in public with a bare top followed by his wife (often pushing a buggy) covered from top to toe in a black Muslim robe. If she cannot wear cool light clothing then her OH ought to cover up too.

My DP is very over weight, hairy and in this weather, very sweaty. He doesn't walk around topless but it's awful that people would describe him as disgusting and vile if he did - because of his weight! He is the kindest, sweetest man I've ever met. I bet a topless man with a tan and a six pack wouldn't be called gross or disgusting.

Im not referring to the OP because I get that it's a comparison to women having to be beach ready before they show any flesh.

Ifailed

I think I get what you're saying -- that you feel that men taking their tops off is an aggressive display and an attempt to claim a public space, regardless of whether (and sometimes with the intention of doing so) it makes some people uncomfortable (and it clearly does).

I'm not sure that we, as a society, can easily make rules about nudity which would effectively combat this. Even our laws about indecent exposure require there to be 'a sexual purpose' to the nudity in order for it to qualify as a crime. So we'd be on tricky ground if we tried to ban men from taking their tops off.

I think this issue would be better addressed by our society becoming less het up about the display of all bodies, with more realistic body types (including older bodies) becoming normalised, less drama and attention paid to the display of skin. Perhaps that would be a better way to take the wind of the sails of the (minority) of men who take their tops off to be aggressive. I think that most men who wander around topless are just doing it because they're hot, they want a tan, or it's nice to be naked. It really is :)

YANBU. I think that it should only be acceptable for a man to be topless in a place where it would be OK for a woman to do so, if they wish. So cover up in shops, for example.

Tigermoll
Well, I agree with the 1st paragraph, not sure about the 2nd, and am uncomfortable about the 3rd!

The idea that it could become 'normal', and even encouraged , to display one's body fills me with dread. Mines shit, I know it's shit, been told over and over its shit and the concept of putting it on show for everyone to agree with my opinion is awful.

I find having a small child to loudly as if there's a volume setting say "look mummy that man's nudey rude, why hasn't he got a T'shirt on?" As the man in question walks past tends to embarrass them in my area

Mines shit, I know it's shit, been told over and over its shit and the concept of putting it on show for everyone to agree with my opinion is awful

I'm sorry you feel that way. If it really is about your own self hatred, then I'm not sure this is the place to discuss it. No one's going to make you 'put your body on show'. We're talking about choice, not compulsion.

I suppose that one of the things I hope for in the future is that a greater display of body types would mean a) there is no such thing as a shit body and b) no one would be judging you. However, when I see all of the comments about 'disgusting bellies', 'stringy chest hair', 'sweaty moobs' and a generalised hatred for the human form on this thread alone, I see that even male privilege isn't enough to protect someone from the venom we seem to have in our society for our poor beleaguered, hated, imperfect bodies. Perhaps it does all come down to insecurity in the end.

I don't care if men want go around with no top on.

But in a shop, they should wear one. Especially in a food shop

I do a sport alongside some incredibly fit and toned men who have amazing physiques. As soon as the sun appears their tops are off, but in all fairness, they spend an incredible amount of time at the gymn and work their arse off to achieve this look,. Here where I live, it rains most of the time, so the sunny days offer the rare opportunity to show their pecks off. Not a problem in my eyes, a bit peacock like, but when a 50 year old man has a six pack on display it's been earnt.

We should all be allowed to walk around topless if we want, but in food shops tops should be worn by all.

OP YADNBU sexism and male privilege indeed.

Why is it always the ugly men that have their tops off? I probably wouldn't mind as much if the fit ones did it.

I'm curious as to why a food shop especially? If you're worried about hair falling into food or contamination, then surely we should all pop on a hairnet and latex gloves at the door. Do you really think that a bare chest is a serious risk?

Just a bit more hygienic to wear a top in a food shop isn't it?

Doesn't protect everything but it helps prevent some