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AIBU?

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Original poster

To let DS invite 2 boys and 1 girl to his sleepover?

38 replies

user1468937236 · 19/07/2016 15:17

DS is 11 on Saturday. He wants a sleepover that night. His best friends are 2 boys and 1 girl, he isn't close enough to another girl, to invite aswell... Do you think this would be okay? They would be sleeping in the living room, with sleeping bags, etc.

OP posts:
TheTroubleWithAngels · 19/07/2016 15:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SarcasmMode · 19/07/2016 15:26

Invite.

The girls parents will decide if they are ok with it.

FuckJeffGoldblumMan · 19/07/2016 15:29

Invite

Up to parents then. I used to go on sleepovers with lads at that age. They were just friends, kids just see mates not ohh the other sex 😂

VioletBam · 19/07/2016 15:30

I don't think you should. They're too old at this age. I have an 11 year old DD and I'd be a bit Hmm. I understand that boys might mature slower than girls but really? 3 boys and 1 girl? Not really the go.

Scarydinosaurs · 19/07/2016 15:31

Invite and up to parents. Do you have a DD who can camp down with them as well? It might be nicer for her to have another girl there- not that it should really matter, but could be nice.

achildsjoy · 19/07/2016 15:32

Invite her and then it's down to her parents to decide, I don't see a problem as long as they are supervised.

imwithspud · 19/07/2016 15:34

Invite and let the parents decide. They can always get in touch to talk about it if needed.

VioletBam · 19/07/2016 15:41

People keep saying "Invite and it's up to her parents" but what would they do? Would they let their DD go on a sleepover with 3 boys at this age?

OP what do YOU think really? Without anyone else's input?

notbothered12 · 19/07/2016 15:42

Not an issue to my mind. Seriously just turning 11. It's fine!

rainbowunicorn · 19/07/2016 15:45

I would have no problem with it. What exactly is it that concerns you about it. If all the kids invited get along and enjoy the same things there really shouldn't be any issue.

soundsystem · 19/07/2016 15:45

Do the girls parents know all the boys? I want to say I'd be fine with it but... It depends on the 11 year olds, really. I wouldn't let an 11 year old girl sleepover with boys that I didn't know well, but if they were family friends/I knew them well I'd be ok with it.

Do you know the girls parents well enough to just ring and ask what they think?

VioletBam · 19/07/2016 15:47

I think people are a bit naive. 11 IS young and most kids at this age are innocent. MOST.

But not all.

Some are well past the start of puberty.

Theladyloriana · 19/07/2016 15:50

I would speak to the parent and ask what they think in a kind of chatty, what do you reckon sort of way. I don't think you should assume it's OK and it may put the parents in an awkward position to just receive an invite.

babyboyHarrison · 19/07/2016 15:50

I think I would speak to the parents but I would feel pretty offended to be left out of my best friends party just because I was a girl. I hope if she isn't invited then maybe you can do something with just her and your son so she doesn't feel excluded. I wouldn't want her to think your son didn't want her there.

myownprivateidaho · 19/07/2016 15:55

No, I don't think that's ok, sorry. Far too much to go wrong, with hormones flying around at that age. I don't have a problem with same sex experimentation at sleepovers, but 3 boys and 1 girl seems like a potentially unpleasant situation. I think he needs to have a daytime thing if he's having a mixed group, or at the very least find one or two more girls to invite to the sleepover.

moosechops · 19/07/2016 15:57

I would invite - I went to regular sleepovers with boys around this age. I was a tom boy and only really had lad mates! I'd of been gutted if I wasn't invited because I was a girl.

nokidshere · 19/07/2016 15:58

I wouldn't have a problem with it at all but if you invite her then the ball is in her parents court.

mrsmortis · 19/07/2016 15:58

Given that most of my friends at school were boys I'm very pleased that my parents didn't have the same attitude as posters here. Sleeping bags and appropriate nightwear are obligatory obviously. But other than that what are you all afraid of?

JackieAndHyde4eva · 19/07/2016 16:01

Would they let their DD go on a sleepover with 3 boys at this age?

Well they dont seem to have any problems with my Son's cub camp. Boys and girls aplenty.

Goingtobeawesome · 19/07/2016 16:03

Hmm, my son is 11. I think it's totally fine.

potoftea · 19/07/2016 16:03

I'm shocked that people have a problem with this. I honestly can't see an issue.
They'll probably sleep in shorts and t-shirts, and watch a movie snuggled up in sleeping bags, then just fall asleep.
I know I'm often naïve but I cannot see any potential for inappropriate behaviour that would not already be an issue if they hang out together anyway.

achildsjoy · 19/07/2016 16:04

Violet, yes I would because I trust my dd and I would hope that I would have instilled a sensible attitude into her, if I knew the family well then it wouldn't be a problem. I think the general attitude towards boys and girls spending time together does more damage than good.

myownprivateidaho · 19/07/2016 16:05

Looking back to my own late childhood/preteen years, sleepovers were a time when more 'transgressive' conversations/behaviour went on than in school. We would sneak bits of alcohol from the host's parents cupboard, play truth or dare, with 'outrageous' questions and dares (eg sneaking out of the house to moon the rest of the party-goers), watch eurotrash on TV with horrified fascination, share knowledge/urban myths/rumours about sex/the sexual activities of people in school. Looking back it was all pretty innocent and probably a healthy phase of exploration. But I think that with several boys and only one girl there is a recipe for making the girl feel uncomfortable/weird of that kind of conversation occurred.

usual · 19/07/2016 16:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

VioletBam · 19/07/2016 16:12

MyOwnPrivate says it well.