Or is my neighbour being ridiculous?!

[Lilianna123]

Always got on really well with our neighbours. They are very different to us but this has never been an issue. Have keys to eachothers houses for when we are away etc.

Woke up this morning to find a note through the letterbox from them, they are saying that our cat 'torments' and 'teases' their dog, by sitting our side of the fence and looking into their garden. They have also accused our cat of eating their hazelnuts off their trees. Now this could be our cat, but could more than likely be the squirrels we tend to have visit?!

Anyway, they are requesting we now try to keep our cat as an indoor cat, as it's not 'fair' on their dog and want us to replace their hazlenut trees next year. Am I being a unreasonable or are they just being completely bonkers?!

Lol, yes definitely get your keys back or change the locks! They're barmy!!

If they could've bothered to collect the hazelnuts themselves there wouldn't be an issue, clearly they don't so why on earth would they want another tree to encourage your cat even more?!

Obviously no cat is going to eat hazlenuts!!! It's not beyond the realms of possibility for it to steal the odd one, but then it would most likely bring them home (as a present) so you'd see. And the dog barking is their problem not yours. Nutjobs!!

That is really bizarre. Cats would not eat hazelnuts and like to sit on fences.

I would get your house key back off them asap.

Colonial oppressor
do anything you can to help bar contributing, collecting footage, watching footage or talking about this further. Anything. Please shout at any time. The code word is HAZELNUT-THIEF-CUNT.

My neighbours cat sometimes sits on our shed roof and my dog goes crazy.

I March down the garden and give the dog a bollocking letting her know that she is not allowed to go noisy crazy like that and she is dragged in the house until she can behave herself. I have never once thought of telling the neighbours to keep the cat in!

My cat used to torment my neighbours dog.....my neighbours thought it was amusing and had a soft spot for my cat x

My dogs eat the hazelnuts that drop in my garden....
I'd encourage a fox (or several) to move into your neighbour's garden. That would really give their dog something to bark about!
And "disgust your cat"....best typo ever... cats always look like they're disgusted about something!

What has a hazelnut in every bite?
Squirrel shite!

If the cat is sitting on the fence then plastic "spikes" would stop it but that's about as far as you can go to placate them.

Odd that they think cats eat nuts.

That CatBat is quite possibly the cutest thing I have seen.

"Dear Neighbours,

No.

Love and hugs,
Liliana123"

Your neighbour is 'ahem' nuts. Cats won't recognise anything like that as food. Clearly she's got a rampant squirrel.

I would actively encourage my cat to deathstare her dog if I were you.

I'd write back saying 'I just want to report this situation to you - I think your dog has learnt to write and wanted to flag it up to you. I suspect the squirrels put him up to it. As the dog seems to be raising their game, we are gonna need our keys back. Just in case. Ta'

Sounds like a Tom and Jerry featuring Spike.

They are clearly barmy.

I would absolutely ignore the note and pretend it never arrived, and if they raised the topic I would completely refuse to engage and start talking about the village fete instead, in an impeccably polite and friendly way.

Oh dear that's hilarious!

Have I got this right-your cat is probably not eating nuts from the ground & therefore you need to replace trees? er OK!

Dog needs to learn to ignore cat!

Our cat only sits on the wall staring when next door have a dog to visit!

Tell them your cat is trying to clear its name over the hazelnut theft and is watching for squirrels.

May i ask how old your neighbours are?

You could counter-complain and say that their dog is terrorizing your cat. It might appear to be sitting still and gazing into their garden but actually it is frozen in fear and its gaze is a "rabbit in the headlights" terrified stare. Therefore you need to insist that they keep their dog in the house as a dog barking at a cat goes against all the laws of nature.

Tell them your cat has a severe nut allergy so definitely not the nut thief.

Not a wind up I promise! They are early 50's, but have Husband has recently retired and wife never worked. We are wondering if they are getting bored and looking at things to pick over!! Will be nipping round this afternoon and explaining that the nut situation must be down to the squirrels and that I can't suddenly keep a cat who's been going outside for 10 years, inside. Wish me luck

My son's dog has been trained to ignore cats, she walks in my house and its like she is completely blind to them.
The cats however, run for the hills!

I've kept cats for 40 years and various cats will eat quite strange things, but nuts???
I've never seen a cat use nutcrakers either!

Keeping your cat indoors seems a bit dramatic.

Have you thought about painting him in stripes the colour of the fence instead?

Get your key back and tell them to keep their dog in or train it to not get wound up by cats.

Then move.

Apologise and assure the neighbour that you will have a very firm word with the cat. Take a bag of mixed nuts as a peace offering.

I had a cat that used to eat pistachio nuts, but only if we shelled them for her first.
How DO they propose the cat is getting the shells off?

Apologise and assure the neighbour that you will have a very firm word with the cat. Take a bag of mixed nuts as a peace offering.

I love this.