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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to think he's bumped her off?

142 replies

Thunderwing · 14/07/2016 09:29

He probably hasn’t (a bit tongue in cheek)

I live in a block of flats, many of which are rented properties so the turnover of tenants can be quite high. About a year ago a middle aged couple move in, did the usual introductions blah blah blah. The woman (henceforth known as ‘the victim’) is a foreign lady from outwith the EU. (Don’t want to say which country in case it outs me or her, but think from the other side of the world with relatively good spoken English). The victim was very talkative, friendly and quite bubbly.

The man (henceforth known as ‘the perpetrator’) was quite closed off in comparison, not really giving much away and very reserved. That’s fine, some people are like that. Plus I caught them on moving day which I know can be very stressful.

We were exchanging pleasantries and observations about the area, when the victim mentioned something about one of the perpetrator’s family members. He shut her down immediately with “We don’t talk about that”, and gave her the evil eye, she looks totally abashed and they make their excuses to finish our chat. I make up my mind at this point he’s a bit of a dick.

Fast forward several months, I’ve barely seen hide nor hair of the victim, but the smells coming from her flat suggest she’s a great cook. The perpetrator on the other hand, I see quite a bit, he has never said more than a dozen words to me in this time.

More recently, about six weeks ago, I bump into him on the stairs. He tells me that the victim is back in her own country so that’s why I won’t have seen her for some time but that she’s flying back home tomorrow and he can’t wait to see her. Fair enough methinks, I wondered why she hadn’t been cooking so much. Sure enough the next day there are ‘Welcome Home’ banners on their door. Aww, maybe he’s not a complete dick. The lovely smells start coming back into the hall within days.

Yesterday, I bump into him again. He tells me that the victim is not yet back from her home country. She’s been away for 2 months, she’s having problems getting a visa, he may well have to go out to her country himself…..(and yes, the smell of cooking is gone again) When I told my DH the story he said ‘yeah, he’s killed her, he looks the sort’. Hmm Confused

I can’t get my head around the fact that she was coming home ‘the next day’ and then all of a sudden she’s stuck because she can’t get a visa. Surely they would have known that the day before she’s booked on a flight?

Talk some sense into me good people of mumsnet….

OP posts:
GooodMythicalMorning · 16/07/2016 14:48

She's left him a few freezer meals before she left. Now he's cooked a few which is why you haven't seen her. Maybe she dumped him, maybe the visa was an issue. We'll never know but loving the mrs marple attempt Grin

GooodMythicalMorning · 16/07/2016 14:50

I would think human flesh would taste like pork. I dont have any experience in this though but just seems the most logical.

WildRoses · 16/07/2016 15:03

Wonder if OP went to visit perp? Been awfully quiet!

Peridotisinvalid · 16/07/2016 15:04

It's very similar to pork but has a slight sweetness.

Ooops! Blush

Thunderwing · 22/07/2016 11:47

Oh my dear friends, I'm so sorry to have abandoned you mid-stakeout.

Unfortunately I have a relative who is coming to the end of their battle with cancer, it's been a tough week for the family.

However, I have not neglected my investigative duties entirely. Let me update you:

OK, so perp has not been seen in person all week. However, one day there was a piece of A4 paper stuck on his door with about 3 paragraphs of instructions for the postman on where to leave his parcel should be not be home. Apparently "Please leave parcel at the door thanks" would not suffice.

This was very handy for me, especially as he signed his epistle with his name in full, and for good measure he wrote it in capitals underneath as well.

Armed with his full name I set to Google - unfortunately I discover he has the same name as a drummer from a dodgy 70's glam rock outfit - it's definitely not perp in disguise though, unless he's had a major operation "Face/Off" style.

Mid-Google, my doorbell rings. It's the postman. He obviously can't be bothered reading the latest chapter of War and Peace that perp left sellotaped to his door, and has handed his parcel to me Shock

It's a recipe?? book Confused

I also ignore the New Testament on his door and leave the parcel propped up on the handle, ring the bell and promptly do a runner. I had the bright idea that if anyone was in the house I would hear the parcel thump to the floor when they open the door. Do you judge me for sweating while I was doing this? Actually, physically, sweating. (get a grip TW ffs!) The thump never came.

So, that's the latest really. Still no sign of the victim, perp's car has been coming and going with no discernible pattern, and he hasn't been cooking this week waiting for his recipe book obviously

OP posts:
boo2410 · 22/07/2016 12:26

Oh TW I am sorry you've had a rough week, big hugs for you.

Thank you for updating, I bet the perp has gone to ground as he's realised his dog is the culprit for antagonizing your cat and is mighty embarrassed. Or perhaps he has realised that cats really don't eat nuts. He sounds a right twat, especially writing war and peace for the friggin postman. Mind you, at least it has entertained us. Has he still got your key?

Thunderwing · 22/07/2016 12:54

He is indeed Dick Almighty Grin and not in a good way. I'm pretty sure that all sociopaths must be hung like a squirrel that's why they're so tetchy

OP posts:
WildRoses · 22/07/2016 14:07

I'm so sorry about your relative. Flowers
You've got to keep a sense of humour in tough time. Lots of love and positive thoughts to you.
In regards to the neighbour, have you read 'see how they run' by Tom Bale? You'll never take another parcel again! Highly recommend the book though. I couldn't put it down!

Thunderwing · 22/07/2016 15:04

Thanks Roses, I will definitely look that book up, I'm looking for some holiday reading and it sounds right up my street!

OP posts:
Andrewofgg · 22/07/2016 15:47

I think they are both spying for Putinn. Or the Chinese. Or both. Keep us posted.

Porcupinetree · 22/07/2016 15:47

The book of course is only a vessel for the message written in the inside cover....

"I know what you did..."

Rrross1ges · 22/07/2016 16:05

Mid-Google, my doorbell rings. It's the postman

You opened the door? It could have been him with a sharp machete and some bouquet garni!

boo2410 · 22/07/2016 23:49

I'm such a prat I posted on the wrong thread, sorry, still sending you big hugs (shakes her head and runs away from the thread quickly whilst swearing to herself).

GlitteryFluff · 22/07/2016 23:56

Sorry about your bad week. Flowers

Lacystacie · 29/07/2016 23:11

Any update OP ?
This is better than any book Grin

Porcupinetree · 26/08/2016 17:10

In the midst of pregnancy induced insomnia I started thinking about this thread at 2am.

Hope you are well OP, any updates?

Thingmcthingyface · 26/08/2016 18:01

I too must know

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