Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think he's bumped her off?

142 replies

Thunderwing · 14/07/2016 09:29

He probably hasn’t (a bit tongue in cheek)

I live in a block of flats, many of which are rented properties so the turnover of tenants can be quite high. About a year ago a middle aged couple move in, did the usual introductions blah blah blah. The woman (henceforth known as ‘the victim’) is a foreign lady from outwith the EU. (Don’t want to say which country in case it outs me or her, but think from the other side of the world with relatively good spoken English). The victim was very talkative, friendly and quite bubbly.

The man (henceforth known as ‘the perpetrator’) was quite closed off in comparison, not really giving much away and very reserved. That’s fine, some people are like that. Plus I caught them on moving day which I know can be very stressful.

We were exchanging pleasantries and observations about the area, when the victim mentioned something about one of the perpetrator’s family members. He shut her down immediately with “We don’t talk about that”, and gave her the evil eye, she looks totally abashed and they make their excuses to finish our chat. I make up my mind at this point he’s a bit of a dick.

Fast forward several months, I’ve barely seen hide nor hair of the victim, but the smells coming from her flat suggest she’s a great cook. The perpetrator on the other hand, I see quite a bit, he has never said more than a dozen words to me in this time.

More recently, about six weeks ago, I bump into him on the stairs. He tells me that the victim is back in her own country so that’s why I won’t have seen her for some time but that she’s flying back home tomorrow and he can’t wait to see her. Fair enough methinks, I wondered why she hadn’t been cooking so much. Sure enough the next day there are ‘Welcome Home’ banners on their door. Aww, maybe he’s not a complete dick. The lovely smells start coming back into the hall within days.

Yesterday, I bump into him again. He tells me that the victim is not yet back from her home country. She’s been away for 2 months, she’s having problems getting a visa, he may well have to go out to her country himself…..(and yes, the smell of cooking is gone again) When I told my DH the story he said ‘yeah, he’s killed her, he looks the sort’. Hmm Confused

I can’t get my head around the fact that she was coming home ‘the next day’ and then all of a sudden she’s stuck because she can’t get a visa. Surely they would have known that the day before she’s booked on a flight?

Talk some sense into me good people of mumsnet….

OP posts:
Hassled · 14/07/2016 18:01

But I have no idea what copper smells like Shock. How will I ever know if I'm smelling blood? I need to find some copper pronto.

Noonesfool · 14/07/2016 18:20

There was a Midsomer Murders once where a lady cookery teacher was doing services on the side for her male cookery students. They were grown ups, not school kids, mind.

She got overly involved with one of them and ended up killing him with a kitchen knife.

Maybe it's something like that?

BillSykesDog · 14/07/2016 18:24

I think it's much more likely that they're in a marriage of convenience for immigration purposes and she doesn't even live there. They're probably bricking it that you're sniffing around. He might even have another girlfriend who cooks. Or his Mum might come over, who knows? All more likely than murder.

BillSykesDog · 14/07/2016 18:24

Coz you can't cook when you're dead innit?

Original poster
Thunderwing · 14/07/2016 18:25

It's ok MN'ers, stand down, I'm alive.

Parcel was with another neighbour so no confrontations with the perp today. His car was there when I got home, all quiet outside his door. I may have lingered a bit but didn't put my ear up to the door, no sir No noise whatsoever, and no cooking smell either. He's obviously eating victim tartare today.

OP posts:
Noonesfool · 14/07/2016 18:27

IF she's dead, I think you can reject the idea that he cooked her, unless you smelled a full on hog roast preceded by some hefty sawing.

Did you?

Original poster
Thunderwing · 14/07/2016 18:30

Of course it's more likely Bill, sshh, don't come here with your sensible thoughts; this wild speculation is the most interesting thing that's happened around here in a long time. Grin

OP posts:
Rrross1ges · 14/07/2016 19:03

Thunderwing

You're next...

Don't have nightmares, do sleep well Wink

FionaThePrincess · 14/07/2016 20:02

Hassled hmm, I also don't know what copper smells like TBH, but don't tell anyone. There's a gap in our policing detectivey skills there.

Det. Insp. Thunderwing oh thank GOD you're ok. I go off duty for a couple of hours and you're going undercover to the neighbours.

I think you need to get Snack Child into witness protection, pronto. This case is progressing faster than expected.

[Proper enjoying myself]

Original poster
Thunderwing · 14/07/2016 20:16

Snack child has been duly escorted to her grandparents house where she'll be safe for tonight.

I've sent DH out for sustenance, donuts and the like, and I'm ready for the stakeout. I'm in this now.

OP posts:
MiscellaneousAssortment · 14/07/2016 20:27

Important question.

Do you have donuts?

You neeeeed donuts.

Original poster
Thunderwing · 14/07/2016 20:49

I have delegated the donut buying duties to DH, he'd better get the good ones or amma bus' a cap in his ass. (or I'll mumble my irritation under my breath, one of the two)

OP posts:
FionaThePrincess · 14/07/2016 21:05

Oh you are very good at this. In awe of your lingo.

DontDeadOpenInside · 15/07/2016 09:28

You know when you've had loads of loose change in your hand and it gets all sweaty?
Well, isn't that what copper smells like?

Or have I been living a lie thinking that's what it was?

What do-nuts did he get? Krispy Kreme I hope!

BathshebaDarkstone · 15/07/2016 11:09

I hope he doesn't serve me with peas. I hate peas. Grin

PitilessYank · 15/07/2016 14:09

I think you also need a big sub sandwich on a stakeout, in addition to donuts and coffee. Mayonnaise should drip out of the bottom of the sub when you take a bite out of it.

You should also bring a container to pee in, and a notebook and pen for taking notes.

CatThiefKeith · 15/07/2016 14:19

You should check the drains for pieces of human flesh op.

He won't be the first to be caught out like that!

OhGodWhatTheHellNow · 15/07/2016 14:42

I had a first date with a chap who was being cagy about his marital status so I (lighthearted-style) asked if she was buried under the patio....long silence followed. Apparently, she had an unknown heart condition and dropped dead in her sleep, in bed next to him Shock He found her when his alarm went off.

This completely spoiled the patio joke for me (although probably not as much as for him...)

The relationship did not go well Blush

hareinthemoon · 15/07/2016 17:59

OhGod ...Oh God.

SylvieB74 · 15/07/2016 18:02

Some people from certain countries whose cooking smells in such a way that all the neighbours would know about it; would be embarrassed about a break up of their marriage. But if you really are suspicious I'd have a word with the police!

pollymere · 15/07/2016 18:07

Anyone can report a missing person. If you're genuinely worried then call the police on 101 and share your concerns. The media reports stories of women abused and locked in cupboards for years, and everyone always comments that surely the neighbours noticed something. You've noticed that the cooking smells were around when you saw her, they came back when she was due back and then suddenly disappeared. I agree that it does sound like she returned from wherever so why did he say she hadn't. It might be nothing but I'd rather be an embarrassed fool than not say something.

Lemonlady22 · 15/07/2016 18:20

my neighbours wife appears to have disappeared too....it was her house, he moved in, now shes gone....curtains are always closed, the garden is overgrown, he looks shifty....but seeing as he lives next to the streets nosy parker (not me lol) im sure i would have the gossip on it by now.....but then i dont speak to her anymore cos of her nosiness so who knows!

thenewaveragebear1983 · 15/07/2016 18:21

When I worked in the prison service I met and taught quite a few men who had 'disposed' of their good ladies in some of the most gruesome of ways, and trust me, 9 times out of 10 you would never suspect in a million years.
I reckon you're on to something op, and he's wafting cooking smells around to make you all think she's home..,.

Doinmummy · 15/07/2016 18:26

I hadn't seen my Next door neighbour for a while. I contacted the letting agent responsible for the property and they said he'd gone in an extended holiday .

A couple of MONTHS later a friend of his knocked on my door asking if I'd seen him ! We decided to call the police , they arrived , kicked in the door and we found him dead Sad

Sara107 · 15/07/2016 18:51

Getting visas can be difficult (despite the Brexiteers depiction of the entire world population just wandering in at will).. She may have booked her flight in the hope / belief that her visa would be sorted but then it wasn't. More likely than dastardly murder on your doorstep. Maybe if / when she does come back you could invite her in for a cuppa.