to think it's not odd my baby wakes up at night?

[hereagainalways]

DS is 4 months old, EBF. He goes down for the night between 6 and 630 (early I know but he just can't stay awake past that) and is up for the day around 6am, sometimes 5.30. During the night he wakes (to feed) at approximately 10, 2 and 4. I have tried resettling him without feeding at the 2am feed (dummy, white noise etc) but he won't have it and it's just easier to feed him peacefully and have him go straight back to sleep tbh.

My NCT group look at me like this when I tell them how much he wakes up and say stuff like oh sorry you have such a dreadful sleeper. Their babies either sleep through or only wake up once apparently.

Don't get me wrong as I would love it if he slept through obviously but I really thought this was quite normal for babies??

That's on the good side of normal IME.

As babies I had one who couldn't be put down for 4 months or so but then slept OK (similar to yours) once she was able to roll and sit, and slept through from about 11 months, and one terrible sleeper who woke hourly or two hourly til he was 2.5 and still woke every night til he was 3 years old.

DC2 slept for 4 hour stretches, woke for a feed, went back to sleep, practically from birth and I told everyone he was a "text book" baby (because the books tell you they wake about 4 hourly, at least the ones I read) and brilliant sleeper because that was my subjective experience and impression compared to DC1 (and if I'd known how DC3's sleep would be I would have thought DC1 was an OK sleeper too!).

Those NCT pals of yours are lying through their teeth - or if not, the tables will turn soon enough! Ours slept 7-7 at the (I felt) astonishingly early stage of 3 months. We told nobody and said he was still waking up sometimes. Sure enough, around a month later he went back to being a normal baby and waking 3-4 times at night for a feed/cuddle/whatever. He's 21 months now and usually sleeps quite nicely from 7-6 but we went through all the stages in between.

FFS, that's a great night for an ebf 4mo. They should try having my 9mo. Regularly awake till gone 10/11, at least 2 wakings overnight and up at or around 7/7.30.

A lot of lies are told about sleep, esp in groups where everyone is trying to out-parent the others and nobody's cottoned on that sleep is as individual as each baby. A 'good sleeper' simply means that you get more rest. It's not an achievement. In fact, those with 'bad sleepers' achieve more, far more, because they do it in a less rested state.

I'm on the March 2016 post natal thread (so all our babies are 4 months) and if you take a peak you'll see how totally normal that is for the vast majority of bf 4 months olds! Feel free to join us.

I'm not sure they're lying as they all struggle with other things they don't seem to mind admitting.

Wrt to resettling, I'll work on that when he's 6 months. I don't want to not feed him if he's hungry. DS is not a comfort sucker - if j offer him boob and he isn't hungry he gets annoyed and shouts.

Point out you ate lucky your baby wants cuddles all night, my lo was the same until 7 months. I really missed those night time cuddles for ages

DD slept for quite a long time for the first three months. I remember one of the other NCT mums talking about her baby waking every three hours, and I didn't say anything but I felt quite sorry for her. Around a fortnight later DD turned into the worst sleeper ever and it was years before I got a decent night's sleep.

Crikey, your baby sounds wonderful! My DD was a horror, at 4 months went through some developmental thing and sleep went to shit - she was up every 1-1.5 hours for the next 6 months. At which point it improved a bit (she started walking) and we went down to about 4 night wakings every night. Until she was 4. years. old. Nearly 5 now and she only wakes once, it's fabulous!

I don't see why everyone has jumped to the conclusion they are liars. All babies are different and unique, just because someone's is different to yours doesn't automatically make them a liar.
It is completely normal for a baby to not sleep through at that age OP but it is also completely normal for an EBF baby to sleep through or only wake up once too. My EBF baby is 12 weeks old and sleeps through or only wakes up once to feed. I'm sure I've done the exact same as you OP, it's just the individual baby and luck of the draw.

Snap Jasper. The first 3 months or so we got away with a feed at about 10pm then she slept until about 5am. Piece of piss. All went to pot after that though and I was a stumbing zombie for the next 4 years.

You lot are scaring the life out of me - still horrendously sleep deprived at 4 years???? Have loads of

My 10mo (still BF) has slept more than four hours once so far. However, 'waking' now only really means making a noise enough to get a cuddle (we cosleep) or plug her in, and she is requiring these less and less.
Her BF friends have been similar; formula-fed more likely to be sleeping through in own cot in own room. (That's not a gross generalisation, just the split in my baby group if no-ones lying!)

All the other NCT babies are in their own rooms actually, maybe there is a link there

The monster was every 2 hours for a 30 min feed for the first 6 months all day and night. Then randomly at 6 months and 1 day he slept through and that was that absent a handful of horrid ill nights with hand foot and mouth, and oddly a couple of nights with I have assumed, constipation! He's now 1yr!

It sounds fairly normal, but I wouldn't be happy about the feeding for only 7/8 minutes. Try and keep him awake for a whole feed at 2 (rewake him with nappy change works) and get him well fed and back to sleep. 7/8 mins is a bit like snacking to me and I would t want to keep being woken for a snack!!

Very normal, he's only a little baby. Mabey some of your NCT group are exaggerating, or bending the truth 😁

Thing is, every baby is different. My oldest didn't sleep through the night until he was seven. That's YEARS not months. His little brother slept through at ten weeks. I didn't do anything differently second time round. The older one is still a terrible sleeper and often gets up through the night.

I don't think your friends are lying necessarily - just lucky! And things tend to go tits up at four months ish anyway so just wait...

I suspect we could have improved it a lot sooner with hindsight. I breast fed her til 4.5 years and we coslept (still do for most of the night), and only actually nightweaned at 4 years as I was too tired to do it and kept putting it off and that coincided with the end of most of the nightwakings.

But she wasn't the only one out of my NCT group who wasn't sleeping through at several years old. I think people often don't talk about it once you are past the baby stage and they still don't sleep because so many people act as if you are a shit parent because you have failed to get your child to sleep properly. I mentioned it in passing in a jokey way to DD's preschool teacher a couple of years ago and she was and sid she could send the HV round to "help". I was and said no thanks, we're ok. I like to point out that my MIL is 60 and still wakes every night and gets up for a cup of tea. If she can't sleep through, why should my 2, 3, 4 year old have sussed it?

word no that's a whole feed for him! He's not fed longer than 10 minutes at a time (from one side at a time) since birth. I worried at first but his weight gain and output are both excellent.

I've tried offering more but he won't take it.

I wonder if mine might sleep better in own room as I can't really move without her stirring - but moving to cot from crib was so unsuccessful we've not bothered with it.
Word 7 mins would be a good stint here, no way would I be pushing to wake her 'more' up!

I wouldn't diss the NCT group - it's probably just their way of showing support and sympathy. Everyone has a different definition of sleeping through but I doubt they are intentionally lying.

I don't get why people don't think babies sleep through the night? Both ours slept From 7:30 ish through to 8 in the morning by 4 months - it's normal for babies to do that. I would guess the people from your NCT group aren't telling lies, they are just telling you what their babies are doing...

It's also normal for some babies to wake during the night

my 9 week old wakes 5-6 times a night.

I was like your NCT group. Then we hit the four month sleep regression. You're normal.

I've already said I don't think they are lying

I have just said that I do think it is normal for babies to wake up. Not something to be horrified by. That is my issue with them - not that their babies are sleeping through.