AIBU to be upset at DM's reaction to new DD's name

[Ladyonashortfuse]

We had great trouble picking a name for our new DD - she was actually nameless for a week while we trawled through 4000-odd names on the Internet, books etc. I mentioned some of the shortlisted ones to DM the other day: her favourite was one DH didn't really like and she said something quite rude about the one we have now chosen, which I sort of ignored at the time. When I told her (on the phone) the name we had eventually chosen there was a silence, then she said, 'You're joking?' And then, 'Oh, well, I'm pleased she's got a name at last anyway.' She is now persisting in calling her Baby so as to avoid saying it. Am feeling oddly hurt. It is a relatively unusual name in England, but it's quite pretty (I think) and not like we called her Moon Unit or anything. Should I have taken her preferences into account?

[biilbosmum]

Do the BBC news sign off test, inserting your babe's name:
"This is Baby McBaby for BBC news in Mogadishu".
If it sounds plausible, go for it and ignore your ma.
That's what we did.

[StrictlyMumDancing]

DM and MIL have never really taken to DDs name to the point that they still both go on (separately) about what a great name DS has.

DD may have got the last laugh on DM though, she told her totally unpromtped 'when mummy was little her name was Strictly and I think its not nice and she should have had another name' . When I stopped laughing I told DD I never really liked my name either!

[PotatoBread]

I like it but can someone please tell me the proper way to pronounce it?

[bubblegurl252]

My MIL said she'd disown my hubby and never see our son if we stuck with our choice of name

[Notmuchtosay1]

Congratulations. It's a lovely name. The only thing is people will ask how to spell it or pronounce it. That may be annoying, but I've got a very common name that everyone can spell, so I'd be grateful for an unusual name.
My OH phoned my mum and told her our 2nd child's name. When I spoke to her a few days later she asked me if it was a wind up. Then went through a list of "normal" boys names. His name was in the top 50 boys names last time I looked, so it's fairly popular. But who cares what anyone else thinks. We can't all like the same names.

[PotatoBread]

Is it pronounced e-lair-e or El-are-e? Or neither?

[GDarling]

You choose the name of your babies or like me you will regret it for ever.
I had lovely names for my DS, Nick, Greg, Alex, Will, (full names for registering) but everyone around me didn't like them, saying Oh! I knew someone with that name and they were horrid.
So we ended up with my DH middle name, I regret it sooooo much now.
On a funnier note, we said my DD was going to be 'Barbie' as in the song that year, most just smiled and made a MMM... Sound, but we called her another name, but recently we looked on Facebook and there are 300 pages of her name around the world :(( maybe you should check on FB first!!!!?????
Love her name by the way, enjoy x

[LoonieToony]

Love name.
Well done!

MIL can walk the plank. Foul woman.

[nixie60]

What is it with elderly relatives thinking they have a right to have a say in the names of other people's children?

I got trapped in a corner at a family party when 8 months pregnant with DC2 by DH's elderly aunt, who said, "Promise me you'll call this baby Gordon". I was appalled, as that was the name of her brother who'd died young, and anyway, DH and I had already chosen our preferred boy and girl names! I just replied, "Not if it's a girl" and scuttled away.

Ignore your DM, OP, Eleri is a beautiful name

[temporaryusername]

I think it was a choice for you and your DH to make and have final say on, of course. But I would not get annoyed by your DM's reaction, it must be a bit disappointing when your grandchild is given a name you dislike. If she keeps raising it, that is another thing, otherwise just forget it and give her time to adjust. It is a lovely name, very pretty and unusual without being outlandish. So I think in time as she identifies it with her granddaughter she will come to like it. Not worth getting resentful about on either side.

[grannytomine]

It is a lovely name, I have never heard it before but I think it is really nice.

People are odd about names, I have 3 GC and I love the name of one but wouldn't have chosen the other two but would never have said anything and of course I love them now as I associate them with my GC.

You mum will get used to it.

[MrsArchchancellorRidcully]

Eleri is lovely and there's a few in our area (in wales)

[Rachwyso]

Eleri is a beautiful traditional welsh name-i think its lovely! I went to an all girls comprehensive and knew a few Eleri's (i live in wales). they were all super clever, pretty and popular girls! Congratulations and i hope your Eleri grows to be as pretty and clever and happy as the Eleris i knew in school

[Rachwyso]

It's pronounced EL-air-REE

[georgetteheyersbonnet]

Eleri is a gorgeous name! Congratulations!

[GreatFuckability]

I think the pronunciation would vary slightly between areas of wales.
One would be Eh-LEH-ri.
The other, and the way id say it, is quite hard to write phonetically as welsh vowels tend to be flatter than RP English ones. the best way to describe it is say a long letter A....in RP this vowel starts as Aaaaaaaa then turns to yyyy.. Aaaayyyyy. Don't do the yyy bit. Ahs that is the middle stressed vowel in Eleri.
I'm sure that's clear as mud..

[Carriecakes80]

As long as you didn't do what one woman did, wanting her dd to have an unusual name, so called her KIIIVLYN (using the IIIV as the 'ait' sound in the name, so that if there are loads of Kaitlyn's at her daughters school, that she will stand out....erm.....it still sounds the bloody same ya daft ha'porth! Anyway, I agree with what most are saying.....This is your baby, and one of the nicest things in the early days is to name them....My first son had four different names the first week of his life, and has a myriad of cards to 'Baby Charlie!' or 'Baby Robson!' lol, and now he's called.....Nah, lol, won't tell until you tell us what you named your bundle o' joy! ;-) heheheh!
Enjoy! You'll be calling her all sorts of names when she's a teenager, and her real name ain't one of them! lol

[Carriecakes80]

Sigh! Now I see her name is already on the thread! And I really like it!! Very different, but not horrible different. Pretty! x

[MrsLouisTomlinson]

DH's GM announced 'I'm not calling her that' when we told her DD's name. 'Has she got a middle name?' 'Well, yes, it's Bobbi' we received a cheque 'for the baby in an envelope addressed to baby Robert the very next week 😂😂

She was bonkers though.

[CarefullyAirbrushedPotato]

I wouldn't pay any attention. My family did the same thing.
DM asked that I give her a 'nice normal middle name' that she could use.
My 'D'sis called her one of the names from the rejected list for weeks, then 'baby' for months.
At this stage it only matters what you and your OH think. One day Eleri will have an opinion too, that's always fun!

[Oysterbabe]

My mum kept saying how "unusual" my DD's name was. Now she keeps telling me that she's "getting used to it".
Her name is Heidi FFS, not exactly out there

[altiara]

MrsLouis - that made me spit my coffee out! She called DD Robert! I really want to know her name now!

[jobrum]

Op, my dm did the same thing. She sent me an email which I picked up during one night with a newborn which said that I should have discussed it with her first and I should swap her first and middle names round to register it and other things I can’t remember as I think I deleted it and cried. My mum is excellent at passive aggressive emails and it really upset me. For months she refused to call my dd her name and would call her other names instead (things like Florrie and Rosie, I suppose as it’s a flower name) and refused to tell some of her friends neighbours and even my dad (who was overseas at the time) what the name was. I never asked why she was so against the name which, not that it matters, is a real name, not too popular, classic, pretty, a completely real, established name. I considered changing dds name, felt miserable about it, it spoilt her name for me, it was no longer a pretty name for my lovely daughter but something I associated with feeling so sad. Now I just get angry when I think about it that she made me so upset over something that wasn’t her decision at all.

My advice would be to just ignore it and forget about it. If you and dh love the name, use it with abandon.

[AdultingIsNotWhatIExpected]

it must be a bit disappointing when your grandchild is given a name you dislike.

I think it's more the chain of events:

• Hi DM, what names do you like and dislike? we can't decide & need some help
  

DM: Oh! I love A, B and C, but I can't stand D
……………

• "We're calling it D"
  

DM: really? or pulling my leg cause you know I don't like it?

• No, really! and we're upset that you don't like it!
  

(which you wouldn't know if you hadn't asked her opinion on it before it was decided)

[OhtoblazeswithElvira]

"Promise me you'll call this baby Gordon"
"Not if it's a girl!"


Genius