To talk on the train?

[lalafala]

So I'm on a very busy commuter train at the moment. I had a call I wanted to make, so being mindful of the quiet zone, I walked straight past it into a normal carriage. The lady sat next to me was busy tapping away at her laptop.

I made my call and about half way through she interrupts me to ask if I can't have those conversations this evening as I'm disturbing her. I pointed out that there was a quiet zone for people who wanted quiet but she replied that it's not about the quiet zone, it's about self awareness and me not having any!

So genuinely, I need to know, am I really BU?

Yes, unless it was a very quick call. People need to work on commuter trains and phone calls are very disruptive. Couldn't you have stayed in the area between carriages while you made the call?

No! What if you were travelling to with a friend are you not allowed to talk to them either?!

Of course it was fine to make a call in a normal carriage. My DH works on the train all the time and that includes lengthy phone calls. If she wants to have quiet she needs to go into the quiet carriage.

slam her laptop lid onto her fingers and snort "self awareness my arse!" and stalk off.

Working on trains is prickish and twattish....you are paying for a seat, not an office

Wish I had her confidence!

People on trains often chat to each other and nobody notices. It's the HELLO I'M ON MY MOBILE WHAT? WHAT? HALF PAST FIVE I SAID HALF PAST FIVE people who piss me off.

Or the ones who have deeply involved, personal conversations with no thought that their seat mate might not want to party to it.

Dunata your post makes no sense. What if work required a phone call?

YANBU OP.

I was a bit confused as to why she wasn't turning to the couple in the seats next to us and having a go at them for talking to each other..

I think she needed to work on her self awareness that the world doesn't revolve around her.

Yanbu. She can go in the quiet bit if she's that bothered.
(Also I have heard some very interesting/amusing half phone conversations on trains, but then I'm a nosy cow and easily amused.)

Not unreasonable at all! You weren't in the quiet carriage and the train is not her personal office! How rude!

No of course you aren't being unreasonable. If she needs to travel in silence she should hire a limo and a driver. As long as you weren't shouting, talking about your boyfriends performance last night or picking your nose she should grow up.

Given that commuter trains are mostly silent, it does seem a bit obtuse to break that silence for what sounds like a non-essential call. I guess people would usually just roll their eyes unless you were talking at normal/loud volume

OP as long as your volume wasn't excessive. I encounter people on trains on a regular basis who could dispense entirely with the phone as people several countries away could hear them - they seem to have no self-awareness of just how shouty they are. Assuming this is not you, YANBU.

Ok this is where I admit that I then probably was BU afterwards because I made another phone call to piss her off and when my dad asked me why I was whispering I answered 'because the lady sitting next to me said I'm not allowed to talk' and she snapped 'no I didn't say that' and I replied 'oh no sorry it's just that I've got no self awareness'. Glad she's just got off the train. Probably to escape me!!

Depends - often people talking on phones can be a lot louder than they think. Maybe this was the case here? It is very annoying to hear one half of a shouted conversation whether you are working, reading, chatting or just looking out the window. Equally, some people talk loudly to a person sitting on the train - this is equally inconsiderate.

ElleBelly, oh I love listening to bizarre one sided phone calls and imagining what is being said at the other end. I did think about writing a book of some of the best, one of my favourites was a posh man in central London, shouting into his phone, "No, I told you she needs a jamjar." Goes quiet. "No, a jamjar, will you listen to me. She needs a jamjar."

If anyone knows why someone should NEED a jamjar quite so desperately I would love to know.

I'd have told her to get to fuck and take her self-awareness with her. It's a train, not a library.

Expat - genuine question - do you really tell random strangers to fuck off?

You were not being U.

Woman should wear noise cancelling headphones if she is so shit st blocking out distractions and wishes to work on the trai.

Granny- me too!! It's like a little snapshot into other people's lives, sometimes bizarre (jam jar, hehe) sometimes boring, sometimes funny. I think it's a shame actually that it's "normal" for a train or bus or whatever to be silent, what's wrong with saying hi, you never know you might have an interesting conversation or learn something new!

'Expat - genuine question - do you really tell random strangers to fuck off?'

If they say a twatty thing like that, yes. And I have done in the past.

YANBU.

If you had been in the quiet zone you would have been VU.

She was BU.

If someone interrupted me during a phonecall in such an arrogant, superior and downright rude way I would likely tell them to fuck off too.

yanbu to talk or make a call but perhaps you could've sat down next to someone who wasn't trying to work... her comment suggests to me you might have been talking louder than necessary... if it were me I would've saved any calls that could've waited until later

what we're you talking about out of interest?