It's personal choice obviously, but I find OOT weddings and bit like OOT kitchens & bathrooms or cars - spending thousands & thousands of pounds on any of that just isn't something I've ever been able to relate to nor understand the value of.
I like weddings where, as a guest, you feel included and not just part of an extended ensemble cast designed to make the bride and groom feel like they're starring in their own lavish production piece. I know that for THEM that's probably (even at least partly) how they want to feel, but it's SO boring for guests who have to sit around twiddling their thumbs for hours whilst the photos are done and no-one's even thought about making sure the guests are comfortable, fed and watered.
A wedding where you get to have a comfortable break (eg: a good snooze) between the ceremony and the evening reception is always a winner for me, coupled with good food at the wedding breakfast. I'm shuddering recalling the absolutely APPALLING 'camp fire cookout' effort served at one particular wedding of recent years consisting of a blackened, hard-as-nails Cumberland ring, half a chicken breast with the texture and flavour of chipboard, a piece of tough, salty gammon and a buffet selection of horrible watery salads and coleslaw that you wouldn't pay 10p for in the bottom of the supermarket's yellow sticker bin. The evening food was a single tiny bread roll with the world's stingiest portion of pulled pork cowering inside. Fuck knows what any vegetarian guests got offered... the sloppy salad and congealed coleslaw, presumably.
I felt like writing to the venue afterwards, incensed as I was that the bride and groom had been charged any money at all for their guests having been served with what essentially amounted to a tragic bin-fire of a barbecue, partially-composted salad and a shrunken bread roll 'filled' with half a teaspoon of pork.
I'm at an age now where I can confidently express my refusal to have to do anything I don't enjoy such as going on hen nights/weekends/weeks, and at a weight where no-one wants a fat bridesmaid (thank fuck because bridesmaid dresses rarely 'suit' anyone and those who disagree are the ones who either got to have input or control over their own dress or are vain enough to think they looked better than the bride).
I used to really enjoy going to the family weddings of my Greek friend: they were loud, exuberant affairs that, whilst probably not 'cheap', didn't need to employ much in the way of frippery or trimmings to feel special. I remember how much laughter there was - so much hugging and kissing and general arsing about and hilarity (the speeches were always brilliant, the family really knew how to send themselves up).... and the food was out of this world.
My own wedding was, I hope, not in any flagrant contradiction of any of the 'rules' I've created above... I'm fairly certain it wasn't anyway!