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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu with dp?

90 replies

Nelly1990 · 13/05/2016 14:44

This is my first post so go easy please. Me and dp have routine of I do the dishes while she washes up but the last few days she has left the dishes until I do them aibu to think she should do them as I do everything else?

OP posts:
Original poster
Nelly1990 · 17/05/2016 22:10

Dp has went back to leaving the dishes the last 2 days which is driving me mad. What should I do?

OP posts:
WhereYouLeftIt · 17/05/2016 22:22

You and she need to talk. And maybe, you should consider if this relationship is healthy for you. Or even if it's a relationship at all Sad.

Original poster
Nelly1990 · 17/05/2016 22:41

Everything else is mostly ok except for her leaving the dishes.

OP posts:
WhereYouLeftIt · 18/05/2016 15:41

Everything is OK? You do everythingexcept the school run and the dishes. Except you also do the dishes. You know the balance of this relationship is wrong. Don't minimise it to yourself, it is not healthy for you.

hellsbellsmelons · 18/05/2016 15:51

I'd go in and tell her that you are leaving the dishes and she needs to get them done in the morning before the school run.
See what she says to that.

I'm with others though. 6 kids! She has taken on 6 kids after having 1.
I'm not surprised she is knackered.

I know I couldn't do it.
But if it is going to be and was agreed to be an equal partnership then she needs to pull her weight.

Leave the dishes until they get done.

Original poster
Nelly1990 · 18/05/2016 19:49

The dishes are still sitting their from last night so she still hasn't done them. I know taking on 6 kids is hard and a lot of people wouldn't do it. I am knackered as well as one dd isn't sleeping that well so I'm up until the early hours with her every night.

OP posts:
Orda1 · 18/05/2016 20:00

Get a bloody dishwasher.

Orda1 · 18/05/2016 20:01

This whole thread is completely WTF.

Original poster
Nelly1990 · 18/05/2016 20:03

We would get a dishwasher if we had room for one which we don't.

OP posts:
WhereYouLeftIt · 18/05/2016 20:24

You don't need a dishwasher. You need to TALK. And she needs to either treat you with respect or GO.

Original poster
Nelly1990 · 18/05/2016 20:43

It's hard to get a time to talk with all the kids about.

OP posts:
Muddlewitch · 18/05/2016 21:21

Could you do the dishes together and talk while you are doing them? I don't mean that sarcastically, sometimes it's easier to talk when you are doing something rather than say face to face 'having a talk.'

Muddlewitch · 18/05/2016 21:21

*sat

AdrenalineFudge · 18/05/2016 21:34

This really does sound like a miserable existence for all involved.

Either way you need to make time. Continuing as you currently are seems to just be building more and more resentment on both sides.

Original poster
Nelly1990 · 18/05/2016 21:36

I will offer her a hand and see if that helps.

OP posts:
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