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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take ds(6) out of school for a week's holiday?

30 replies

ShamefulPlaceMarker · 26/04/2016 22:30

Okay, my reasoning being that his df works away and has been away for last 18 weeks. He's back for 2 weeks soon, then is away for the whole summer, until middle Sept.
The 2 weeks he is home we are considering pulling ds, who's in yr1, out of school for 5 days so we can spend some quality family time together.
Aibu?

OP posts:
Creampastry · 26/04/2016 22:33

No. Do it.

EatShitDerek · 26/04/2016 22:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Gileswithachainsaw · 26/04/2016 22:38

for the love of god do ot. amd have a wonderful time. I bet he will be thrilled to see his daddy and get to spend some.proper time with him.

Helloitsme88 · 26/04/2016 22:42

Do it (I'm a teacher)

Original poster
ShamefulPlaceMarker · 26/04/2016 22:44

Smile Thanks! Wasn't expecting that response.
If he was in yr6 (ir god forbid yr2!) doing his sats then we wouldn't consider it. Bit he's still so little.

OP posts:
GreaseIsNotTheWord · 26/04/2016 22:47

A few months back I would have agreed with the pp's and said just pull him out but my feelings about missing school for holidays in term time have changed.

The dc have always had over 95% attendance in school, every year (usually 98% ish).

We took them out for a week before Xmas for the first time. Fine. Then...bloody chickenpox earlier this year. Ds2 missed ten days. Ds1 missed a whole fortnight (was ill for a few days leading up to it).

We've just had 'poor attendance' letters for being under 85% and I really didn't like it. I know the CP time can't be helped and that the letters are automated...but still, it stung a bit. And if it hadn't been for the week we took them out they'd have a far higher % and we'd not be having red bloody warning letters.

So I know that a lot will disagree with me, but i'd not take the dc out of school again, I've really learnt my lesson. Maybe a odd day for a special occasion, but not a whole week.

Original poster
ShamefulPlaceMarker · 26/04/2016 22:49

Why greasels what happened when you got the letter? Were you fined?

OP posts:
EatShitDerek · 26/04/2016 22:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Jojay · 26/04/2016 22:52

Our Head would probably authorise the absence in that situation. A letter from your DH's employer confirming the situation would do the trick in our school.

Original poster
ShamefulPlaceMarker · 26/04/2016 22:59

I'm not too fussed about the attendance percentage, he received 98% attendence in his report last week, & we're nearly in the last quarter of the school year.
I am trying to weigh up the effect it'll have on his work when he returns after a week off.

OP posts:
Cabawill · 26/04/2016 23:04

Just do it. I'm normally a proper stickler for rules but I think it's getting ridiculous. Youre the parent, no holidays aren't a right but family time is so important.

Gileswithachainsaw · 26/04/2016 23:12

I am trying to weigh up the effect it'll have on his work when he returns after a week off

how much work do you think would actually get done when he's at school knowing hos dad who's been away for 4 months and is going to he away again very soon, is home and he can't be with him. and even when he is home he has homework.

stuff the letter. it's just words on a piece of paper.

dolkapots · 26/04/2016 23:15

Just do it! I can't imagine they will be doing that much work in five days that you couldn't cover at home in a few hours. Do you intend to inform them that he will be off? If so then ask for some worksheets sent home.

Greasels I know what you mean about the feeling you got regarding the letter. I got one because I informed the school that the dc would be missing two days due to a holiday. I know it is standard procedure but it still really made me feel uneasy.

Enjoy your family time OP.

Original poster
ShamefulPlaceMarker · 26/04/2016 23:16

giles my ds gets so upset when his df leaves. It's awful! I spend most of that day & night consolling him.
Luckily dh is usually on a 4 weeks on/4 weeks off rota. But due to lots of courses & stuff he's been away lots more than normal.
Hopefully he'll settle back in to routine by Sept, but then the summer's gone and we'd have had no quality family time together

OP posts:
Original poster
ShamefulPlaceMarker · 26/04/2016 23:17

He was away the last 2 christmases too, so we've had not proper time together for anwhile

OP posts:
PeteAndManu · 26/04/2016 23:18

Do it, write a letter and explain the situation and it may come within authorised absence. Even if it isn't authorised do it. Family time and the memories are so important. It's the only time you can do it, it's not as though you're trying to get a cheaper deal and could do it in the summer.

GreaseIsNotTheWord · 26/04/2016 23:21

No, didn't get a fine or anything. I just hated the knowledge that it was our week that we pulled them out that had pushed the dc into being 'unacceptable' in terms of attendance.

I know it's just a piece of paper and all the rest, but it's not a piece of paper I want to get again!

Gileswithachainsaw · 26/04/2016 23:22

Oh bless him.

I'd not even think about it. he could just as easily be ill for those five days. I'm sure there will be plenty of learning going on with the activities you all do.

I hope you all enjoy the week. must have been really hard on all of you.

hownottofuckup · 26/04/2016 23:26

Do it do it do it!!!! helpful Grin
No really, you definitely should.

Original poster
ShamefulPlaceMarker · 26/04/2016 23:28

Thanks giles
Yes, we will do it! I'll write to school to let them know too

OP posts:
LogicalThinking · 26/04/2016 23:42

Take the holiday. There is nothing that vital that a 6yr old will miss in a week off!
Attendance % and letters are irrelevant when compared to spending valuable time with his dad.

Original poster
ShamefulPlaceMarker · 26/04/2016 23:45

We've chosen the week before May half term. Dh goes away again on the weekend before halfterm, and I guess that that week will be less busy than other school weeks

OP posts:
missbishi · 27/04/2016 00:39

As long as you're happy to suck it up re: letter from school then YANBU. I suspect it will be far more beneficial for his wellbeing and development than a few days of school. Hope you enjoy yourselves.

LucyBabs · 27/04/2016 00:49

I'm wondering when all the un authorised absence fines/letters kicked off in the uk?
I'm not from the uk, over here if a child is absent from school for 20 days in the 9 month period then child protection will be informed.
We don't have a huge issue with children missing school and if there is a problem within a school or with a child, it's dealth with within the school

LindyHemming · 27/04/2016 07:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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