Scouts Parade v family life

[ParadiseCity]

My 11 yo is in scouts and tomorrow there is a St Georges parade through town. His leader told them all 'it's compulsory and you can't be excused unless you are dead or dying'. However, DS is reluctant and I just don't have the inclination to jolly him into it. I'm glad he does scouts but at that age I was a guide and remember how embarrassing the public parades were. I'm normally ultra supportive of all their activities and think that when you have committed to something you stick with it etc. But he committed to Tuesday evenings down the road not a Sunday afternoon in town. I work full time, juggle a lot of stuff (as we all do), and just for once I CANNOT BE ARSED. AIBU and should I woman up and make him go?

Our District has changed the format of St George's Day this year to try and encourage more children and parents to take part. DS's group are hosting the event, and many of the children and leaders have spent hours rehearsing and organising this event. I just hope that there aren't too many children or parents from the other groups within our District who have your attitude.

If you cannot attend due to other commitments, you cannot attend. And that shouldn't be held against anyone. And they certainly shouldn't be told they shouldn't be in scouts, then, especially if they regularly attend all the other meetings and behave well.

And btw, St George's Day is today. Saturday. 23rd April.If they've chosen to celebrate it with a parade tomorrow, Sunday, they've changed the terms of their own 'requirement' to suit themselves. (And probably so as not to interfere with the 'bigger' sport of youth football across the country.)

Draylon: I'm happy to buy into an ethos, but that doesn't mean I have to buy into a religion. Nor do my children.

As an ex-Leader of many years I find your attitude disappointing, of course no one can force children to attend these events but most scout groups are pretty clear that St George's Day Parade and Remembrance Service are two commitments we do expect the young people to attend.

As others have said, you can't just 'pick and choose' the 'fun' bits . It's only one afternoon - is your 'family life' so important that you can't support your son in attending this event?

I remember the fuss one year when we weren't able to offer a summer camp for various (totally understandable) reasons, plenty of parents 'complained' -- but none offered to help.

If all the activities of Scouts don't tick your/your ds's personal idea of "fun" then don't do scouts, its not compulsory. Its not the type of organisation where you get to cherry pick what you want to do or can change. there will always be marches or other activities that aren't your dc's cup of team. its a good lesson to compromise and take the good with the bad. find another hobby.

OP, you're suggesting that lots of scouts dislike this day and find it boring. Well that's not the case in our group. It's always well attended.

I agree that perhaps Scouting isn't for your family. Maybe relinquish his place for someone on the waiting list.

Our group has 183 names on the waiting list and if names aren't down by the age of 4 there's little chance of joining.

Woman up. We're atheists & DC still went. I cheered them on and wondered off to eat cakes during actual services

Hobbies are meant to be fun. I cannot see any value in adding in boring parts that no one really wants to do.

It's also a group that teaches about duty. And Respect. If you want purely fun stuff... actually, you won't find it anywhere. So good luck on that one!!

Pearlylum......uncomfortable????
Its not celebrating England's glorious past. St George was chosen as a role model to scouts because of his braveness and selflessness.
Please do not decry an organisation whose volunteers give a huge amount of amazing experiences to young people.

They made a promise to an imaginary figure. They may as well have pledged allegiance to a ninja turtle.

Meh, you've got a previous commitment on a Sunday, that takes priority. The DDs do Rainbows/Brownies and never do the parades/church events. The religious aspects of the organisation are problematic for us (and by that I mean DH and me) so we avoid those and make use of the positives (and I don't just mean the 'fun stuff', for me the Guiding organisation is a valuable female-only space for my daughters).

OP

Your OP is all about YOU

What does the child want?

Incidentally, I have as big a problem with the queen bit in the promise as the god bit.

You can learn about duty without being forced to worship someone else's god. The scouts are supposed to be an inclusive organisation. All this 'going to church twice a year is absolutely compulsory' is absolutely the opposite of that.

He's made a commitment to Scouts and so he should go. It was always my least favourite part of my children being part of Guides but they couldn't cherry pick the bits they wanted and so they went unless they were ill enough to be in bed. I often CBA either but that was my problem and not theirs. It's a good lesson in responsibility.

It's "compulsory"

I would just text and say my child was unable to go and not give it another thought.

Compulsory

Oh so is Scouts still a religious thing? I thought they had changed the promise.

I still think it is U to lay down the law about attendance on certain days when there could be other, just as 'crucial', commitments that other people volunteer to run every week on that particular day (am thinking about football here as DP coaches DS's team and would be mighty pissed off if half the team couldn't make a match because of a parade).

We are not religious either, Draylon. Scouts and Beavers do not require promises to God any more. They are inclusive of other religions, faiths, or people with no religion at all. Read up.

From the website:

New alternative wording of the Promise:
On my honour, I promise that I will do my best
To uphold our Scout values, to do my duty to the Queen,
To help other people
And to keep the Scout Law.

For Cub Scout section (ages 8 to 10½):
I promise that I will do my best
To uphold our Scout values, to do my duty to the Queen,
To help other people
And to keep the Cub Scout Law.

Our cubs is massively oversubscribed. The leaders work their arses off for the kids throughout the year. They ask for four Sundays each year. Four. Trust me, I'm the least religious, or committed, person ever, but I do insist DS goes if he is able, just as a thank you to those leaders who put in all the time and effort week after week. Four cubs from his lot turned up to St Georges parade last week - it was pathetic.Funny how they all manage to make it to the activity days though eh

It's scouts FGS, he's not been conscripted.

My ds is very proud to wear his uniform and march through our town, it gets a lot of support and people will come out and watch them walk by. He gets a lot from being a cub and I will always encourage him to participate in all the activities they do.

Our St George's Day parade is not at a church, it doesn't have to be.

Normally the parade is followed by a religious service, so for us it's a partly a religious event. I thought that was Good for DC. To learn to respect the ceremony all about paying respect.