AIBU to think that DCs should be served first?

[DioneTheDiabolist]

When dining with my family, we always serve the children first. It gives us time and space to cut up food, get them sorted with sauces etc. Then, when the adult food arrives everyone is ready to tuck in.

I have been eating out recently with friends and more often than not the adults are served first. Why do restaurants do this? It causes more faff than necessary. Back in the dark ages when I waited tables we were told to serve children first. Happy DCs = happy bill payers.

So AIBU to think DCs should be served first?

We usually ask for our children's meals to come with our starters. We have never been refused this request. My little boy is autistic so I NEED for his food to come first. Otherwise it is an incredibly stressful experience.

Wow calm down attackers! It was my friends little boy (2yo) and he went into a full meltdown and it sent my friends into a total flap which tainted a nice lunch out. I didn't say it was the waitresses fault.

My kids are restaurant kids, they dine out a fair bit and eat what's given, when it's given!

Tut tut hola you should have said!

tigger either you don't have DC or it's been a while since they were toddlers. They are not rationale. Just yesterday I was in a shop trying to buy socks and underwear for DS. The pair of them ran twice around the shop like mad mad children. I rounded them up and left the shop with DS wailing about the fire truck socks that he wanted. I told him no running in the store and both DC must hold the stroller. Failure to do so means we go home. 2 seconds later both ran off. I promptly grabbed them both and marched them home. Problem is that DS still needs socks and underwear!

As for eating out, I do ask that the kids food is cut into bite sized pieces. In the UK it's shocking how often that doesn't happen. I take the DC to the Toby now as tonnes of veg and it's so overcooked it falls apart on the fork. The kids seem to like it and I'm happy it's not McDonald's.

I think it is a cultural thing then, In the UK we expect our children to learn to use cutlery from a relatively young age but even adults in the US seem to prefer to have it all cut up so they can only eat with a fork. Having said that, depending on what they were eating and where, I don't always have an issue with fingers being used or biting from the fork.

I think you are definitely on the right lines with what you are doing but I suspect you are maybe not being clear enough or not using an in charge tone of voice. Yes, toddlers aren't rational and we all have those days when I presume there is a full moon. But if you are finding this is their normal behaviour you maybe need to find some way that works better for you?

Want2be, do you have a double stroller?

I bought all that sort of stuff in Walmart, with the DCs packed into the trolley. When Target opened near me I also went there, and again packed DCs into the trolley, because they were not really trustworthy roaming free and needed to be restrained in enormous stores.

For ordinary items like socks and underwear, ordering online is probably the easiest way to go. You're not going to be able to try them on in the shop anyway.

OneMagnum -- American children that I have observed learned to cut up their food in the American style at about the same age my own children were learning to do it à l'Anglaise/ l'Irlandaise. Otherwise American parents would be driven scatty cutting up plateful after plateful of food.

Want I have five children under 12, youngest less then a year old. I think I know a few things about toddlers, thanks It wouldn't take me 10 minutes to sort out food for all of them, inc the baby.

Most restaurants I've been in serve the children first - but they're family friendly restaurants anyway. Those restaurants that are a bit posher, we normally ask them to bring out the children's food first - or at least with the adults' starters. It's only ever been a problem on one occasion.

My two year old waits patiently until everyone is served before eating. He struggles to wait for the swings but gets that we wait until eating as it happens everyday.

math we have the citi select which is a tandem and the baby is in the bassinet as she can't be in the car seat for more than 20min right now. That means I only have one seat. I went back yesterday with him on his own and he managed to follow directions. While he has been diagnosed with autism he has had problems out and about in shops so I'm not about to start using his disability as any sort of excuse. He did really well yesterday and the ladies working there gave him a sticker at the end for doing so well.

tigger I'm really happy that you are able to control your kids so well. It takes me longer because I refuse to tolerate anything other than waiting patiently until food arrives. My kids sometimes struggle with this hence it takes 10mins when they do. I'm not about to compromise regarding their food or their diet. Eventually they will learn how to behave and also how to cut their own food up. Until then, it's really helpful for their food to come first and/or for their food to be cut up into bite sized pieces.

That should read that he has NOT had problems when out and about.

tigger I'm really happy that you are able to control your kids so well. It takes me longer because I refuse to tolerate anything other than waiting patiently until food arrives. My kids sometimes struggle with this hence it takes 10mins when they do

That doesn't make much sense. You won't tolerate anything less than waiting patiently for the food to come but then they mess around so much when it arrives that it takes you ten full minutes to chop a bit of chicken and a spear of broccoli? That doesn't add up at all.

God forbid kids get taught to wait.

Yes because I'm correcting them. I don't accept my kids running around a restaurant or making noise when waiting. As I posted earlier, it takes longer to cut up food when I'm correcting them. The actual cutting up of the food doesn't take that much time. It's all the other bits that go with it. Also, I don't mind if the food comes out with it needing to be cut. I just want to know this when I place my order so if that's the case I can order something that's cold.

Sometimes making the effort does take longer and isn't as pleasant but it's better than being one of the 'anything for an easy life lot' who pander to children who just need teaching - some exceptions obviously for children with different or special needs

All that correcting must be fun for the other diners! Ten minutes is an awful lot of correcting, and then throughout the meal as well....gosh.

Gosh.. I'd like to think want2b dines with people who appreciate the need to educate children and teach them table manners.

My son will wait for his but it depends on circumstances. My little brother is autistic and was problematic to wait for food when he was little.
My pet peeve is my sons food coming on a boiling hot plate.

Sorry, this might be only child syndrome but when I was a kid we went out, ordered and then everyone ate at once, or kids food came our with the starters but you still waited until everyone had their's (while grandparents would go "start, go on. Don't let it get cold!").
This was also standard at every meal I ever ate at a table with my parents, including at home. And yes, I'm dyspraxic and struggled with proper cutlery usage until I was 11. I tried, then DM would help if necessary.

Mortified by taking children out to dinner who can't sit and talk to adults, wait for everyone, not climb under the table, can't use cutlery, demand someone spoon feeds them even though they are 7 and 4!

I meant the other diners not at her table, but way to prove my point there.

Loud teaching of toddlers for lengthy periods in a restaurant...not fun for anyone. Maybe educate them at home, in private.

Whenever im out for dinner i more than likely get a starter and because dd takes so long to eat i ask if dd can have her dinner whilst im having my starter, she literally just finishes hers whilst im finished my main she does get some of my pudding if i fancy one. It works for us

Why would it matter to other diners at different tables Why does it have to be loud? It doesn't.

I'd rather listen to a parent trying to erm.. parent their children rather than some of the people who think letting their kids play their ipads loud to placate them is the better option, or running around everywhere. Least she's doing something. With your other points on the thread I agree...

10 minutes to cut up a toddler meal? Only if you're using toothpicks or they've been served a whole raw turnip.

What is strange is that ALL children manage with waiting for their lunch at nursery or school! They all wait until it is their turn and then they wait until others have finished before starting dessert. If expectations are that they wait, they are able to. If they are not expected and allowed to create, then they do! I suppose its about setting your expectations for your child.

The DCs did wait. They waited as the food was ordered and cooked (about 20 minutes). The issue is not them waiting, it's my food getting cold as I wait for theirs to arrive and then prepare it on a crowded table. I agree with the PP who say that children are served first in family friendly and good quality places.

I therefore conclude that IADNBU.