To think this man is a shameless racist.

[Misssss]

One of my very close friends has another close friend who I see fairly often as we all live in the same area. The friend of friend is lovely but a little too sweet. I don't think she has a bad bone in her body (she refuses to join in with bitching and always finds positives in everyone.)

Recently the friend of a friend has got a new boyfriend. At first he was ok but seemed very interested in the fact that I'm black. He was always asking for my opinion on the best Caribbean takeaway in the city or how to make jerk chicken. A few weeks ago we were in a bar and it was his round. I ordered a red wine. He came back with a can of Red Stripe for me because he thought I'd prefer it. I declined the drink as I hate lager and went and bought my own.

At the weekend he started to refer to me as "my n*gga" in reference to a popular hip hop song. He then had the audacity to play it on his phone in a pub.

By this point I'd had enough and called him on his fuckery. He got really defensive and said that his other black friends didn't mind and insinuated that I was being too sensitive. Friend of friend insists that he didn't mean it and he just thought i would find it funny.

Aibu to be annoyed?

Thank you, thank you. I declined their lunch invite today and I'll compose fuck off text later.

The app won't let me go back to get individual names but I hear you sisters! I hate being called exotic, wtf is that supposed to mean. My brother's children are mixed race and their great uncle proclaimed that the girls would be in demand when they were older because they were so exotic.

Really agog at what some men say to women. How fucking dare they. Ping pong balls... Curry... WTAF. As I get older I'm getting less and less tolerant to this crap. The next dickhead that thinks it's appropriate to announce that he "loves chocolate," will regret the day he was born!

Apart from a couple of incidents (working in a train station off licence during uni, my boss scheduled me to work alone on the day of an Edl march!) I've never come across massive outrageous racism. Lots of subtle things and massive ignorance though. I guess that's why it threw me so much. I agree this man has some kind of personality disorder crossed with ignorant racism.

I do think there are people who are uneducated racists who have no idea that they are offending people and then there are sinister nasty racists. In this case though I am thinking sinister.

I cannot believe he called you his "nigga"! That's atrocious!

Lorelei I also apparently can't be "from London" despite being born here, speaking with a London accent etc. I must "really" be from somewhere else I mean it's okay to ask once "where are you from" but if someone says "I was born here" you need to get the hint!

Well, Misssss, think yourself lucky you aren't old enough to remember the Seventies! Not that the Eighties were all that, either.

And there are vanishingly few "uneducated racists who have no idea that they are offending people". Really, there aren't. In my experience, the overwhelming majority of people who say something disparaging are motivated by hostility, not let down by lack of knowledge. They recognise perfectly well that they are being less than kind, they just don't care.

Do you feel this prick is jealous of your friendship with her and is trying to push you out by being vile?

WTF is his GF doing defending him? Did everyone else just sit there? Screw that, I'd have said something to her as well as him! Uggh