To ask why you go to work

[IamthepermedowlofVeronica]

Try to be brief but thorough....
Due back from 1 years maternity at the beginning of June. Hate job, don't want to go back. Have had offer of temporary ad hoc work between June and start of summer hols.
Wondered how much job seekers is whilst I apply and interview over summer hols. Did the online calculator tangy: If I work current hours and pay childcare I would earn £6 less than if I signed on job seekers.
So why should I go to work (no career, just a money earning job) and how does signing on work? Has anyone found it detrimental to confidence etc?
Hopefully I'll get another cash earning job in September or,something when ds will be 15 months

Actually I don't want child bearing and raising to be the preserve of those who can either enormous childcare costs themselves or are supported by partners who can afford to have one parent stay at home

You don't want parents to be able to support the children they choose to have? Seriously? Everyone, have as many kids as you like, no matter if you have no money, someone else will pay for them!?
Nope, real life doesn't work that way. You make new people, YOU clothe and feed and house them. If you run into problems and you can't, thats what benefits are for. For those in need, not to cover life choices you can't afford to make.

I agree that some support should be available when children are very small. Also the work they do should fit in with their life, child support is also paid. However, the level of for funding parents to stay at home is an issue, that in no way relates to the very important role they have chosen.

Sorry but I think actively getting yourself knocked up by donated sperm whilst having no intention of paying for them yourself is morally wrong...that is not the point of the benefit system.

Maybe..it doesn't feel wrong to me though. I've been completely upfront with the Jobcentre, they know my situation and I've been told I'm entitled to benefits. Guess that makes it a choice I could make! Like it or not it's not illegal I'm afraid. I won't work until my 2 little ones are ready for nursery. I'm loving every minute and I'm working at being a good mum. That is work, it's just unpaid! I have every intention of setting up my childcare business in around 2 years. I will be spending more of my life working than not when all is said and done. I'm not lazy, sometimes I miss working but I wouldn't change a thing.

Not unpaid for you though, is it?

Jesus, I've just ranted on another thread but I'm so glad the tax my husband pays on his 80/90/100+ hour weeks is going to a good cause. No wonder this country is on its knees when the Entitled are front and centre ahead of those in genuine, unavoidable need. The benefits system is supposed to be a safety net not a fucking lifestyle choice.

I work for my sanity. Maternity leave nearly killed me I got so depressed. The money is an added bonus!

I agree with aliceinwanderland

I think caring for children, disabled people and older people is valuable to society and I think it's a good thing that the benefits system provides financial support for people who care for them. That's the whole point of benefits - they go some way towards filling the gaping hole left by capitalism.

There is a small minority of people who abuse the system but that's great exaggerated by the right wing millionaire-owned press. The money lost to benefit fraud and "scroungers" is a drop in the ocean compared to the money lost to tax avoidance and tax evasion by corporations and rich individuals. If people got half as angry about that as they did about "benefit scroungers" we might just have a better chance of making society fairer and more equal.

greatly exaggerated

Sorry, I fail to see the huge moral outrage in someone giving up a secure but loathed job in the hope of finding something more appropriate (in which they will probably work more effectively and productively) and receiving a small amount of financial support while they actively seek more appropriate employment. The risk is more theirs than society's or their current employer's, as at some point, if they are unsuccessful in finding more appropriate work, they will be forced back into inappropriate work and thus back into tax paying, they won't be allowed, want to or be able to jobseek forever, and by leaving their current employer rather than secretively casting about for something else, their current employer can find someone more committed. It's a win-win all round if they find something more meaningful to them, because they will undoubtedly do that job better and thus contribute more to society that way than they would by plodding on in the hated job because they haven't had the time to focus on getting out and finding something better... I seriously doubt the OP is going to want to be unemployed for a long time on Jobseeker's Allowance and would not actually resent, as a taxpayer, someone taking that risk for a short amount of time.

roundaboutthetown if that as to me my post wasn't at OP. In reality I'd be surprised if she can claim anything, but I do understand where she is coming from.

Yy roundabout. Very sensible points, completely agree.

It wasn't aimed at you, Squidgey - just at everyone who criticised the OP!

I think there's a big difference between someone who's never worked, had children, stayed on benefits the whole time, and people who have worked but are currently choosing to not work for a few years to look after very young children because they are financially worse off by working. Though, saying that, in my experience, some of the former don't always do it by choice or just to claim benefits, it can be a product of bad schooling, teenage pregnancy, cultural norms and low self esteem. It's not black and white at all.

The problem is if everyone relied on benefits when they had children then the tax burden would be too great. When there were more parents staying at home the cost of living allowed families to have a good standard of living on a wage of a semi or skilled employee. This is no longer the case. Benefits have been cut and some of those cuts have been tough.

I think people are being a bit hysterical. I see nothing wrong with a mum of a 1 year old baby quitting work to raise it, whether on benefits or not, however concieved.

I know many LP who have done this SAH till kids school aged. I sah and it meant everything for me. Why should lone mums be denied that choice. In many cases because the father cleared off etc.

This whole do what you can afford and this is 'real life' is based on our screwed up society that doesn't value unpaid caring. It's not the way things are universally, it's man made not neccesarily the right way. Who should be the one to say when and if a woman can have a child, you could argue it's their biological right. Just because it doesn't fit in with a current or narrow world view of who can afford what by am unequal system.

Other people put themselves first and the establishment certainly do. A parent who genuinely believes that a child needs it's mother/parent whilst very small should be able to.prioritise its needs. This could be in either childcare or sah home care. It often costs more to support a lone parent in work and with childcare. So why not let then decide for a few years whilst child is small?

i think i go to work to pay tax so that people like you who dont want to work can claim JS allowance....i hate my job too sometimes but i like to be able to house and feed my family!

just read this statement 'personally i dont agree with using nurseries.......blah blah......then 'i have every intention of setting up my childcare business in around 2 years'.........by the same person.....you couldnt make this up!!!!

It is very common for people to become childminders so they can care at home for their own DC. I would say the most common reason from the CM i know. I have heard lots of nursery workers say they feel sorry for kids there all day.

Potato I wouldn't put my child in a nursery but I would take care of somebody else's child in my home setting. That's because I know that other people choose to work and use childcare. I don't agree with taking kids to macdonalds but I worked there once (I lasted 4 days bloody hated it). What's the difference? Do we not live in a world where others have choices too? I can do my best to care for somebody's child, I've worked with children all my life. Does that make me more favourable to the child than their parents? No it doesn't. However you never know, I might have something to offer regardless. I love kids, it's what I do. It's an obvious choice in order to be at home with mine. jellybeans there are crap childminders and good ones. There are also crap nursery workers. Having a personal reason to become a childminder doesn't necessarily make you a bad one!

I work for my sanity & confidence. I would feel depressed if I didn't.

However, DS has just been sick everywhere with a temp of over 39 & I'm equally sick with worry as to how I will deal with tomorrow, important meeting at work & a lone parent.

THIS IS WHEN I WONDER WHY I WORK.

He's 2. He needs his Mummy, but I'm fearful of losing my job.

lamthepermedowlofVeronica I would suggest that you go and speak to the CAB to make sure you're making the right choices as regards what to apply for and whether you would need to have a temporary job lined up so that you weren't 'quitting with the hope of employment' iyswim. The last thing you want is to assume one thing only to find the rules say different.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to be at home with your child, especially when they are so young and you are absolutely right to explore your options.

That said there's nothing quite like the cut, thrust & parry of "scrounging SAHM v's money-orientated WOHM" debate at 2am on MN eh?

At the moment we are on an abroad posting for my husbands job so I do not need to work as salary is high. I have, however, found myself a part time job because I find being a sahm all the time difficult and unfulfilling.
In the UK I had to work and I will have to again because we need the money to pay our mortgage. I like working part time while my children are small if possible

jw I've worked with children all my life.
so 36 years looking after children then

• you have not worked all your life with children, you have not even 'worked' all your life from 17 to 36!!

I work because I need the money, the pension, the satisfaction of knowing that the degrees I worked for are being put to good use, the enjoyment, the social side of things...

After reading the OP and other similar posts I wish there a box I could tick on my salary slip that would enable me to opt out of contributing towards the benefit pot for people who choose not to work.

I think people are being a bit hysterical. I see nothing wrong with a mum of a 1 year old baby quitting work to raise it, whether on benefits or not, however concieved

So what if we all did that? Every person with a baby quits work and gets benefits...how long do you think the system would last then? About 5 mins.
Some people only get to choose to do so because the responsible people don't. It's the very definition of taking advantage.