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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

In thinking that 4 billion owing in child support is a national disgrace?

145 replies

CreviceImp · 08/04/2016 12:50

www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/absent-parents-owe-4bn-overdue-7025101

Scandalous....

Make the Petition section on here something you visit regularly.

OP posts:
cannotlogin · 09/04/2016 21:39

And I should say that it is also perfectly fine for NRPS to give up work to be supported by new partners.

The only thing that will change things is to name and shame, proper investigation by the HMRC and subsequent prosecution, and widespread publicity on what child support should and shouldn't look like. That way, friends, family and colleagues would be clearer on what their friend/family member should be doing. But mainly it needs women to stop pro-creating with such specimens pretending that it's ok. I suspect animal instinct of protecting one's own will make that impossible.

Pisssssedofff · 09/04/2016 22:01

They do include CS in benefit calculations in Australia and they also calculate the rp' income before deciding what the none resident parent pays. So if mum is successful it removes the burden from dickhead dad which does seem right either.

Pisssssedofff · 09/04/2016 22:01

Doesn't seem right

SwearySwearyQuiteContrary · 09/04/2016 22:46

We need a cultural shift where NRP that do not contribute equally to the care and fundamental needs of their children are viewed as guilty of child neglect , emotional and financial abuse.

CreviceImp · 10/04/2016 18:30

Exactly Sweary

Thank-you everyone for your continuing support. Numbers are steadily rising.

#ParentsPayUp

OP posts:
CreviceImp · 10/04/2016 19:10

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-30955060

Scale of the problem.

OP posts:
CreviceImp · 11/04/2016 07:27

Bumping for today 🙂

OP posts:
CreviceImp · 11/04/2016 16:15

www.facebook.com/parents.payup

Just done this today. Please offer your support and share x

OP posts:
CreviceImp · 12/04/2016 10:01

Hello everyone,

Found this article that indicates the 'new' agency is failing more than ever.

www.gingerbread.org.uk/news/310/Gingerbread-responds-to-new-child-maintenance-arrears-figures

Just wanted to pick your brains today and ask you what you think would work?

OP posts:
CreviceImp · 12/04/2016 10:12

blogs.lse.ac.uk/politicsandpolicy/self-employed-status-child-maintenance-evasion/

This is an excellent article explaining how the system is abused by some individuals who want to shirk their responsibilities.

OP posts:
CreviceImp · 12/04/2016 12:27

It's on the Gingerbread site now (scroll down)
www.gingerbread.org.uk/content/2129/Campaigning-with-single-parents

Keep offering your support everyone there is a long way to go.

OP posts:
CreviceImp · 02/06/2016 22:44

Long overdue bump. Can you head over to petitions and offer your support if you feel able for this petition.parliament.uk/petitions/126895 petition?

TIA

OP posts:
Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 02/06/2016 23:32

Signed.

CreviceImp · 02/06/2016 23:40

Thank-you 💐

OP posts:
CreviceImp · 03/06/2016 09:26

Bump 🙂

OP posts:
CrazyDuchess · 03/06/2016 09:28

Signed

CreviceImp · 03/06/2016 12:36

Thank-you everyone who has taken the time to respond and sign the petition.

Unfortunately I am rapidly coming to the conclusion that most people do not give a shit about caring for others in our society and campaigning for what is just.

I really feel defeated today.I have spent HOURS writing to child poverty and single parent organisations,MPs , journalists, feminists, potentially interested celebrities, campaigning on Twitter and Facebook. I understand that Rome wasn't built in a day etc but all this effort and only just over 750 signatures. To put in in context the campaign for BBC recipes achieved thousands.
This is and should be considered so much more important. It is about the needs of women and children (and a small proportion of men) being ignored by an ineffectual government agency and the wider society that shrugs and does fuck all. The injustice continues and will until people start to show they care.

I don't think I have ever been more disappointed and saddened in my life. It has certainly started to change how I view wider society. I am taking a break now from this and it will probably be permanent to be honest.

Wishing everyone who has helped the best xxx 💐

OP posts:
emilybrontescorset · 03/06/2016 13:08

I don't know what the answer is.

How do you make a nrp pay when they pack in their job and their new partner then starts working full time?

It's all very well saying get their family to put pressure on them , they don't care!

I have to agree thst women who go with these scummy nrp are just as bad.

There seems to be a feeling that the first wife should not be doing anything except surviving.

emilybrontescorset · 03/06/2016 13:09

Oh and the number of people who trot out the ' his wife stopped him from seeing the kids' bollocks is astounding.

cannotlogin · 03/06/2016 13:19

oh crevicelmp it's total shit, isn't it? I have been waiting for the last 8 years for some kind of collective social conscience to suddenly 'get it'. The reality is that we are a very small minority of people that this issue affects. We are also mainly women and frequently single which means everything is our fault...way too many people have the 'well, she got what she deserves' and 'why on earth doesn't she just go out to work' attitudes (even when we do work and even when we clearly didn't deserve being beaten to pulps by people who proclaimed to love us or heaven forbid, we decide we don't want to be married to men who cheat on us.

There is a huge shift that needs to take place in our society - don't give up. Shout about it, challenge it. Make a nuisance of yourself. Tell the people around you the truth - because they tell other people. My builder made my day once when after picking up my keys at my place of work said 'you know, I hear all sorts in this job and the last time I heard 'single parents get all the benefits' crap, I told them about you, your job, your home, the fact you look after your children with no support from the ex...'

That's at least one middle-aged man out there who is able to see the truth. One down, millions more to go....we can do it together, for future generations of single parents, even if we can't make the changes for ourselves.

Keep smiling.

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