get it out before she pops 2

[littlemaemae]

Following on from aibu to take dd3 to a&e

Jarofpickles and Randomm, great posts and calm helpful advice.

randdom and jarofpickles it's good to hear from people with your qualifications and your views on the situation. It's a shame the doctors mae is dealing with aren't being so clear. mae I hope your DD is going the right way, are they continuing the movicol in hospital?

Good to see some sensible advice from Jar & Random.

I hope things get better today OP. Taking notes of what people say and when I helpful if only for you to have to hand when shifts change.

Coming over from other thread, not much to add you've had good advice already. Thinking of you both

I don't think. anyone's meaning to scare anyone.

my sincere apologies if I have conteibuted to that. was never my intention.

I think if things are explained in a way that at least shows they are taking things seriously or believe what you have told them, then that makes all the difference

I have, like others on here, experienced being made to feel it's in your head. have had obviously issues glossed over and fobbed off as normal. dd1 and 2 have both fallen foul of complete incompetence and refusal to treat.

it's hard. action doesn't mean cutting ir even scanning.

it can just mean agreeing there's a problem and not treating parents like they are the shit on their shoe.

or kicking off at a dr cos they ask fir an xray and the x ray tech shift is ending

Yes I'm wondering about the secret medicine! hebbie
This is all a lot more common that you'd all think. I don't think it shows the nhs has gone downhill, far from it. The op has managed to see several hcp very quickly. In fact I seem to have to wait to see my hairdresser, far longer!
In fact the treatment given, and suggested is very much in line with guidelines as I know them.

we all like to believe that someone can do something, without actually thinking how that might have to happen.

Hives , are you saying the photos are showing something normal ?

Sorry "common", rather than normal.

Woke and thought of you immediately. Some very helpful posts here to negate that vitriol from perfumedlife thankfully. I hope that they can now see the distress you're both in and will start to do all they can to actually help instead of fobbing off now.

Random's post seems very balanced to me.

Sending positive thoughts from Sheffield... Hope that she is sorted out soon, poor love.

Hi OP. I haven't read the whole thread - I'm one of those annoying posters who wades in, ignorantly.

I hope you read this and it helps you.

My DD had cancer; she was DX in Jan 2011 after 3 months of me fighting GP and A&E who all treated me like I was paranoid. I was told repeatedly that she was fine and I was over-reacting.

I am not, for one second, suggesting this is what is going on with your DD.

I have, however, in my five years of hospital-going experience learned a few things about how to get stuff done when the Drs insist you are some clueless, paranoid idiot:

1. Write down everything. When any doctor speaks to you, ask them to spell their full name for you. Make it CLEAR you are recording everything. This is also useful for looking back over with whoever is treating you when you finally get to the right place. This is also helpful if you share care at the hospital. They are buggers for saying one thing to you, you go home for a rest, then whoever has picked up the care of DD getting told something completely different.

1. Find the PALS service at the hospital and use it. This is the patient liason service. Contact them over your concerns, the way you were treated and they will intervene on your behalf. They might not be available over the weekend, but will be their on Monday. This is also where you start a formal complaint.

1. Ask to see the consultant - I've seen some good advice on here about who you should be asking for.

1. And this sounds so divisive - but let them see you are emotional. It was amazing how care ratched up a notch when I got to the point that I cried. I'm not a crier, but I was on my last nerve. DD is autistic and would never make a fuss. I told her she needed to make a noise to show that it hurt. I know how awful this reads, but because she was dealing with it all in silence, they thought she was fine. As soon as she cried and made a noise, they couldn't do enough to help. It makes me feel sick writing this, but it is sadly true.

1. If you get sent home, go back. Keep going back. I went back about 4 times before she was finally admitted. It just takes one good doctor and you're off.

1. If you do get sent home, make it absolutely clear that you are unhappy with the level of care and you have their name and you will be acting on that.

1. I am not, believe it or not, confrontational. However, I had to learn to be. If you struggle, draft in some back-up, get another family member to be there when you challenge them.

Hospitals are fraught places. I learned that the people who make the most noise seem to win. Those who endure politely get nowhere.

Saying all this, I am still intensely grateful for all of those professionals who did listen and did care. They were out there and, because of them, I have a happy 17 year old DD who is now doing her A levels and 3 years off chemo.

Thinking of you OP but hope the doctors recently commenting have eased your mind a little. I still think you need to push to stay in hospital longer though so that the medical staff are aware of how long it is taking for everything to get moving. Is she still drinking?

With regard to the secret medicine, my own medical knowledge stretches as far as savlon and plasters but there were early posts from people stating they were nurses etc and they were urging OP to demand treatment. I think that's where the layMNers 'campaign' has probably come from. It's hard to be calm when it seems a child is being neglected. I think OP could do with some of her HCPs taking the extra minute to listen to a parent's fears and explain a more clearly.

I am in Northamptonshire, in future I would go to KGH (Kettering) as its much better. NEVER go to Corby, and Northampton isn't much better.

I'm so sorry this is still going on. It's got to come to a head soon and I hope they Spring into action once that happens. Poor DD, she's been so brave.

If you are constipated, your tummy will stick out, I suppose the poo has to sit somewhere! . My DD tummy looks rather strange too.
It's fairly common to be constipated is what I meant, although to be fair I see perhaps more than my fair share as I work in the speciality as well as have a DD with chronic constipation.

Thinking of you.

Thanks for all the advice and reassurance from HCPs.
For me I was really concerned yesterday because of her stomach swelling more and her feeling unwell. At that it could be an emergency.

She is passing wind so now I know that is a really good sign.
I am very relieved to now know she's not in imminent danger.
And I know getting her sorted out properly is going to be long term.
We will have to keep going on the movicol and Senna and watch closely.
I really don't want to come across as villianising the doctors and nurses.

And having the continence nurse able to send us straight to the ward is probably the biggest step towards getting her better that we have made. So it's not all bad we have made progress xx

I didn't mean exclusively to thank only HCPs
You are such lovely people to care so much about what is happening with my DD I actually can't believe it xx

Oh and she is a happy little thing this morning. God, She is adorable.
The children's ward is amazing so much to do, homely and very comfortable for them.

Glad things are going well for you. I'm sure it will resolve, even if it takes time. At least you feel safe there and will be monitored.

You've made huge progress and it's all down to you and your DH. I think your fears yesterday were justified. If the HCPs didn't want you to be fearful, then they should be explain why they are doing something; when it should work by; and what to do next if it doesn't. They should also be reassuring you at every stage that your daughter is not at risk, and what you can do to keep her comfortable.

Honestly, I am not a medical professional and I would have been demented with worry.

For example, yesterday, when you were sent home after an enema I was baffled why. Then you asked folk here how soon they work and they all confirmed usually soon; you asked the hospital as well and nurse confirmed about 20 mins. Much later someone in the thread said it could take several enemas. If this is the case, you should have been told this from the beginning. Rambling, but hope you see what I mean.

Well done. I would listen to the two doctors who have posted.

Glad you're in the right place and dd is happy.

What Randdom and Headofhives said.

i think a lot of people are getting a bit carried away with "something must be done", and something is being done. An X-ray wouldn't change that. Constipation is a really difficult issue that takes time to resolve.

I am glad she is feeling a little better this morning, I hope you managed some sleep and good luck for today, I really hope things start to move for you.

I'm glad she's feeling better.