get it out before she pops 2

[littlemaemae]

Following on from aibu to take dd3 to a&e

I feel like this is taking a sinister turn. I haven't panicked up until now. I've been very calm, collected and hopeful.
It could just be anxiety and exhaustion.
Me and dp are arguing because he is telling me to calm down.
I have been calm but I should be able to have feeling and be concerned for DD.
He always tell me not to be a robot emotionally as I am a practical person not an emotional one like him.

It is probably just anxiety.

Third enema just happened.
5 people held her down. She has fallen asleep on me in the treatment room due to the trauma.
The most traumatic thing I have ever witnessed.
It didn't work.
Talking about maybe sending her to Leicester.

The nurse on duty has specialist experience and he has been wonderful and so caring. He is going to make sure she has the proper care and not sent home.

Oh sweetheart I'm so sorry.

Trust yourself and your instincts. Not a week ago people were saying not to go to a and e. It's not that bad. Then came those with experience saying it's not normal. You followed advice and your instincts. You've been great. You are great. You know this isn't right. Don not go home if you are concerned about it. You are a fabulous mum but you are not medically trained. They shouldn't be putting this on you.

I have nothing useful to add except you are doing a brilliant job fighting your LO's corner.
Keep on keeping on x

Op, I am so sorry. It sounds really brutal! I can't imagine how DD feels being held down to have an enema, that would be frightening for anybody! I really hope they move you over to Leicester or somewhere that you can get DD more specialised care at the very least.

I don't have any help to offer, just another Mum holding your hand and telling you I think you're doing an amazing job.

And I think you're right to stay in hospital too.

littlemaemae
So sorry for your situation You have done amazingly well up to now.
I am amazed that this is still not sorted out. I think you should push for a change of hospital. It is all very well telling you to stay calm but that is easier said than done.
I am just praying that the enema will produce results (better late than never).
Is your DP supportive in front of the staff? It is important that you present a united front to the staff. Otherwise they might disregard you or treat you as a "fussy mother"
I will keep coming back to this thread

If moving to Leicester means better care for her, and that the medications/procedures continue throughout the night/weekend then I'd do it. I recall at the start of this thread that people have said your current place isn't great (I can't remember where you are...)? If that's true then I'd take their suggestion about the move. We are not far from London but we don't live in London. When my child had to stay in gosh for 2 weeks, we rotated and my younger child was 18months old and still bf. It was damn difficult, but we did it. I stayed for the week (as I could take emergency leave at work) and then went home on the weekend (dh came up then and we swapped children). The siblings saw each other on Saturday and that was it.

Good luck.

I'm so sorry you have both had to go through that. How awful.
What do they hope Leicester will do? How far away is that?

Unfortunately I have no good advise to offer, just wanted to say that although you are not feeling it at the moment but you are doing incredibly well. Your love for your daughters shines through and anyone can see what a dedicated mum you are. KOKO I sincerely hope your little one gets the help she so desperately nèeds x

Op, I've been lurking on the thread but not posted as yet.

I live very near Leicester, if you get moved here and if you need anything at all (a good home cooked meal, a hug, trashy magazines - anything) just pm me...please

When they done the X-ray or any other tests could they tell if her bowel is twisted? For all of the enemas she had and they aren't working surely it's more than just impaction?

I agree about refusing her being discharged unless they are transferring to another hospital.

I'm so shocked that this thread is still going and there been no significant change.

I'm glad that you've got an HCP there who is on your wavelength and who you trust, op. That must be comforting.

Bit about how quickly they went from 'send littlemae home, her mum can deal with her' to 'send littlemae to another hospital as she clearly needs more specialised care', though! It's the seemingly schozophrenic nature of medical decisions which always throws me (although admittedly it is not always so).

I imagine it has freaked your DH out a bit to hear you panic if he is usually the emotional one - it's reversed your roles and he's probably thrown by that (bet he wouldn't admit that though). He needs to get on with it and support you, you are fully entitled to find this process challenging and to need help getting through it!

I'm sorry you had to witness the enema. It really is horrid. Ive given lots of enemas at home to my DD, it used to be our preferred option, but it isn't nice. IT can take quite a while to unblock my DD, sometimes I was giving enemas every other day for a couple of weeks.

I'm not sure I'd want to stay in hospital, but it's a personal thing and you may feel more confident there. You might want a break for the weekend.

Thank you for the lovely messages. I am in a bit of a tizz and will read them properly in a little while.
Manual extraction has now been mentioned, decisions will be made on Monday.
She seems so well in herself. This is crazy

I have followed this from the beginning and can't believe what you and your little daughter have been put through.

Is this what the NHS in 2016 has come to. Will no one in the medical profession take pity on this little girl and help her! How this little girl and her mother are coping with these barbaric treatments I don't know. She is little more than a baby , she must be terrified. At the very least can they not sedate her.

I have nothing but admiration for you Littlemae, you are a better woman than me, I don't know where you are getting the strength to fight from, whilst watching your daughter in such distress.

I pray that this comes to an end soon.
xx

skin not sure what you expect the medics to do. Clearly they are trying to help her...first with gentler treatments because if they were to work you wouldn't need to do anything traumatic. They will start with the less invasive, gentler treatments and work forwards in a process. At each stage many people in her position will have the situation resolved, thus no need to go further.

What particular treatment would you like her to have?

The nhs has been there for her, with free treatment, and will continue to be so, without running out which us not available in every county in the world.

I'm so sorry this is so horrendous love. I can't say anything more constructive than I'm thinking of you and hope to god that this is properly resolved soon. Xx

Do you know if they intend to do the manual evacuation where you are or in Leicester? I would ensure that whoever intends to carry out the procedure is experienced in doing this and presume it will be done under a GA rather than sedation. It seems like the local paediatric unit is running out of options, I would ask about being moved to your nearest children s hospital for specialist treatment.

Please insist they sedate DD before any other procedures. I think you've both been traumatised enough. (Very experienced 'hospital' parent). I'm appalled by the whole story. And yes, manual extraction (dear god) must be done under sedation at least and by someone very experienced in doing this with children. Ask how many times they've done it.

Would Birmingham children's hospital be better than Leicester?

Sorry got confused. I meant sedation for enema and GA for manual extraction.

Hi,
I think the treatment being so delayed has made the situation worse than it needed to be.
But saying that, once we had broken through that barrier, they really have been excellent.
I think we have all been thinking 'oh the next thing will do the trick' and it hasn't.
They are saying on Monday we will talk about Leicester. So that's where any further treatment would be do and it would be under GA.
But... It could go really well this weekend and we could get something moved.