AIBU to ask for her to pay?

[Skala123]

I have a friend with the same age DD as my DS. We are close friends. We occasionally help each other out by having the kids.
Recently she asked me to have her DD and on that day I had planned to take DS for a day out to a place with a pretty hefty entrance fee. I said of course I'd have her but could I have the entrance money and a packed lunch. I have been absolutely vilified! Who is being U?

well i'd say sorry, in that case i won't be able to have her for the day.

Just say no then, and be clear that it's because she won't pay for it and she's badmouthing you about it. Unless she's had your DC far more than you've had hers, she's behaving very badly.

Doesn't matter if it's £10 or £100, the principle is the same - it's an extra cost being IMPOSED on OP because she is kind enough to offer to sort out this woman's childcare issue. She shouldn't have to pay anything extra at all, the other woman should be offering and being grateful. Other woman (not "friend", imo) is being unspeakably rude if there's nothing more to it than what the OP has posted.

Are you having her daughter for the day now or not? (Please say not. Cheeky mare! )

Well what did she say?

Vilify seems extreme!

Meh, people like a moan and a "poor me" rant now and again. Sounds like she didn't expect you to find out hence back tracking.

YWNBU to ask her to pay.

Chalk it down to a lesson learned and don't give her the opportunity again. She sounds dramatic, so don't buy into the drama.

She said no thanks in the end!

Problem solved then....

If friend A started slagging friend B off to me because:
B had requested childcare
A has promised her child she is taking them to X so didn't want to change plans
A offered to take B's child but said you'll have to pay entrance and pack a lunch

I'd be . And not at A, at B all the way.

Never type before coffee...

Ok....and do your views change if this friend is actually my sister?? And no she doesn't take my DC out on trips out etc, though we do help each other out with childcare occasionally. She childminded for me three years ago when I first went back to work and I paid her and she throws this back in my face all the time whereas I see this as a totally separate matter.

Still not enough information.

You've not said precisely how much the entrance fee is.

We don't know if you're loaded or on the bones of your arse.

And you're drip feeding.

YABVU.

I am neither loaded nor broke. Entrance plus lunch and snacks would be £15ish

No, it doesn't change my view. If you chose to treat your niece that's fine, but I don't expect BIL/SIL to pay to take my DD out somewhere unless they offer.

The childcare is just a rod to beat you with. You paid her, it was a business transaction. If she gave you a reduced rate that was her call within her business.

Apologies Skala I was correct in my first message. I'd be looking at the person complaining not the person who was asking for the money. Definitely meant don't post before coffee!!!!! I've reported my own second post insert facepalm here

Totally agree with strictly!

I'd have a lie down Strictly. You've confused me 😄

OP. Your sister is being an arse.

Have a fun day out.

I think I need a sort of breathalyser but for alertness levels rather than alcohol.

No strictly your alertness level is well below acceptable for posting, please wake yourself up/get some rest first

I need a late night 'too much wine step away from the Internet' tool.

Why don't you wait until you have time to write a description of what actually happened, with any relevant context.

Flinging scraps and failing to answer questions is just annoying.

The question "could you have my dc for the day?" can be politely answered in a number of ways.

Yes... Or No

You can even decline because you don't want to.

However if you are already committed to an activity with your own child and offer to include another child in your plans, the LEAST the other parent should do is offer the entrance money.

Whole other kettle of fish if you actually offered in the first place.

If your sister charged you for childcare, (hoping that she WAS registered etc etc) then wtf is she doing chucking this at you?

She child minded, you paid.

She asks you to mind hers, she's covering the real expenses incurred

She has no business bitching about you.

Don't agree to take her child for a while. She can't have her cake and eat it.

15 pounds is roughly $30 over here, Not cheep at all