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AIBU?

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Original poster

To want parents of children with headlice to be told??

140 replies

Elouie · 15/03/2016 17:49

We have been going round in circles with headlice for about 6 weeks now.

Our school have a policy of issuing a letter to all in the class when a case is confirmed but won't tell a parent directly that their child has them!

My children now have dry scalps and dandruff on account of the amount of rubbish I've been treating them with.

If they were spotted on my child I would want to be told.

It's just a vicious circle and I'm a bit sick of it.

OP posts:
Chattymummyhere · 15/03/2016 17:54

They should send the affected child home until treated plus send a letter out to everyone.

I hate this whole cannot single someone out crap.

First day the new reception class started as Ds school the whole school got a letter about headlice! If a parent cannot clear it in the 6weeks holidays they are not going to listen to a generic letter.

bigbuttons · 15/03/2016 17:55

don't be ridiculous

3littlebadgers · 15/03/2016 17:57

I feel your pain. Reception and yr1 were a nightmare because of a child in dd1's class. You could see loads of the empty egg cases in her hair, there is no way her mother couldn't have known. Yr 2 now, and the little girl left, so far dd1 hasn't had them at all this year. If only something could have been done in the previous two years I would have saved hours and hours combing the little blighters out.

Original poster
Elouie · 15/03/2016 17:57

Big buttons is that aimed at me? What's ridiculous?

OP posts:
NameRanger · 15/03/2016 18:02

This happens at our school too.

A letter sent out to everyone in the class saying there's headlice about. The same people don't treat their kids again and again so they keep reinfecting everyone.

I mentioned this to the teacher as I couldn't afford to keep treating the kids (plus not that great for them) and was told the same thing - they're not allowed to tell the parents if their child has nits!!

I feel your pain OP.

Lucsy · 15/03/2016 18:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bigbuttons · 15/03/2016 18:04

it's aimed mostly at the second poster.

You know not all kids with lice have parents who do anything about it or care.
You cannot punish the children.
I have had kids with lice when I have sworn that I have got rid of the blighters. They still went to school with lice.

Lice are not a health threat unless the infestation is very very severe. They are annoying that's all.

My experience of children so far is that my year 7 girls( s0 12) have had more cases of lice than they ever did when they were young. I'm sure their parents don't wash and brush their hair.

It doesn't bother me now that I have discovered the wonders of listerine.

dementedpixie · 15/03/2016 18:05

If you have the minor ailments service at your local chemist then you can get headlice treatments for children for free

Finola1step · 15/03/2016 18:06

In my previous school, a letter would be sent home to the parents of the child concerned. The letter would state that the school suspected that the child had headlice and that treatment should be undertaken before the child returns to school the next day (e.g. The parents were expected to do it that night). A bug busting note was always put on weekly news letters.

You can not assume that the school doesn't send out an individual letter. But if the don't, then you do have a point.

IME general letters to all are taken notice of by the very people who don't need to be told. So for example, in our school we have a specific problem with idiot parents driving up a very small road at pock up and drop off. And driving up a private road. Letters and Parentmails get sent. But the very people who do it either don't bother reading the letters or think that the rules simply do not apply to them.

I wouldn't be surprised if some parents of constantly nit infested children simply think it can't possibly be their children the letters refer to.

Hassled · 15/03/2016 18:07

The thing is it's very hard not to know your child has nits. There will be itching and moaning about the itching and it gets to a point where the nits are clearly visible. Some parents just don't see it as an issue. So it's not the case that the school telling the parents will be a blinding revelation to them - they'll already know, and for whatever reasons are failing to act.

Finola1step · 15/03/2016 18:08

Listerine you say *BigButtons"... Do tell. I swear by Listerine for keeping all sorts of coughs, colds, throat infections at bay. But head lice?

MoreGilmoreGirls · 15/03/2016 18:13

Here you go:
www.homeremediesthatreallywork.com/listerine-lice-treatment-at-home/

Wolfiefan · 15/03/2016 18:16

My DD had nits for what felt like forever. I now put her hair up, spray any stray bits with gel spray and use a bit defence spray.
Since then no nits!

Wolfiefan · 15/03/2016 18:16

Hassled. Apparently not everyone itches!

Artandco · 15/03/2016 18:19

You shouldn't be treating your children's heads if they haven't any lice. Only if you find some. Search each night, and only treat if you find any

Original poster
Elouie · 15/03/2016 18:21

Apologies I'm not very good at highlighting usernames.

I'm also intrigued by listerine. Please tell.

It's not so much about the cost as we can get in on prescription here it's more the effect it's having on my children's scalps and the pain of treating it time and time again.

To the poster who said I shouldn't assume they aren't told, it's not an assumption, I have friends that work at the school, now I agree I haven't heard this first hand from the HT themself, but I do believe it.

It might be worth a letter to the school, it's so frustrating. I don't want the children to suffer (mine or anyone else's!) or to be penalised but the cycle does need breaking.

Finola I take your point re parents assuming a general letter doesn't apply to them which is why I don't get if their are children with a persistent untreated problem they can't be told directly.

I.e 'it's been identified that your child has headlice, please ensure they are treated over the weekend, these are the best products and this is how you can get hold of them'

I supposed this still won't always result in the parent treating it...

OP posts:
MrsDeltaB · 15/03/2016 18:25

This has become a recent obsession of mine lately, a bugbear if you pardon the pun. One child in DD1s class was sent home recently, apparently with a severe infestation, I check both my girls (and the 18mo DD3 who hardly has hair!) almost every day now.

We use the Vosene nit repellent shampoo daily and a mint based conditioner once a week. DD1 has THICK curly hair and it takes an age to get through it. DD2 has very fine short hair so slightly easier.

I do wonder if I should simply get DD1s hair chopped but resent the feeling of having to simply because someone else can't put a little effort into their own child. Both the older two seem to have mild dandruff (yes, daily washing doesn't help but thats another story!) and it makes it harder to tell what's what sometimes.

Right, that was my first post and I've waffled! Must try harder!

mumgointhroughtorture · 15/03/2016 18:30

I have a family member who's family are crawling with them constantly. It's got to the point where I have stopped being around them coz I was sick of getting them. She used to only do the daughters hair once then leave them for weeks. The lot of them had thick long hair and u could see their heads were alive with them crawling around. Another member of the family (who didn't live in the house) did the girls hair one day and had a piece of paper full of adults. It took her all day to clear the girls head but the Mum wouldn't have done it again in 3 days. She used to get told by school and she would laugh and moan about other people's kids giving her daughter them again ! She was sent home 3 times in one term and still didn't get rid of them thru out the family ... the dreadful part of this Is this is the same woman who is at uni studying to be a Social Worker .... these parents are oblivious !!

In the end the girl would cry coz no one would play with her in the street but who wants a kid who's sitting scratching and picking nits out of her hair whilst playing. It should be classed as neglect in the extreme cases ! It can affect kids friendships and confidence in the long term if everyone knows they're the ones with nits !

BettyBusStop · 15/03/2016 18:35

Are you treating your children even if they don't have nits? You don't need to do this.

Try conditioner combing on a regular basis and treat if necessary. Although the silicone treatment shouldn't damage hair, it's more like expensive FrizzEase.

SohowdoIdothis · 15/03/2016 18:35

If the schools sent children home every time they had nits we wouldn't have a problem, just like Japan, In Japan if you are harbouring anything you keep yourself in isolation until it totally sorted out, my Japanese friends had never seen a nit, nor come across anyone with them.

Just nitty gritty comb with conditioner every night if they are in your school.

bigbuttons · 15/03/2016 18:38

listerine original poured on head over sink until soaked ( i catch excess in bowl and pour back in bottle).
Wrap hair in plastic bag(keeps hair wet)
Put towel over the top( stops drips)

Keep on for a couple of hours/ over night.
wash out if desired.

Sallyhasleftthebuilding · 15/03/2016 18:39

Our school letter stars nits are more likely to be passed on at home than at school!!!!

Tea tree oil a few drops keeps them off and cheaper than the vosene shampoo - that's all that's in it.

EverySongbirdSays · 15/03/2016 18:42

I really think they should bring back the Head ringing the parent and telling them to come and get them out of school.
This is one of the modern changes since my childhood which I think is terribly wanky and "please don't tell me there's anything wrong with my special snowflake"

Yes it isn't nice for one or two to get singled out, but better hurt feelings than outbreaks of any variety.

unlucky83 · 15/03/2016 18:43

Our school used to send out a letter a child in your DCs class has headlice - they have been told they can't do that any more as people then use chemical treatments without checking if they need to or not and the lice are becoming resistant.
Instead if they know there are lice we get a note on the monthly newsletter telling us they aren't allowed to tell us, you should be checking your child weekly with a nit comb and you shouldn't treat unless you see a live louse etc. I know if that is on the newsletter it means there are headlice in the school....
I only opened the email late at night so hadn't checked DD but told her to keep her hair tied back and not to touch heads etc and the reason why and she said I know name of one of her best friends and another close friend has them I was Shock. She hasn't got them but I put the warning out to other parents they were in DDs class (didn't name children)...
They are all about to do a show - lots of girls all together sharing head dresses, brushes etc - a disaster waiting to happen!
I mentioned to the lady supervising DDs class on a practice day that she didn't have them and she did have her own brush - she was horrified - hadn't realised that generic message meant there were actually heat lice in the school!!! (I then told the organisers to warn the supervisors etc ...) We've never had them and I really don't want them ...

dementedpixie · 15/03/2016 18:43

I don't think they should be penalised or have their education affected over head lice.