Need reasonable expressions of surprise and curse words

[FinallyFreeFromItAll]

I keep finding myself saying "oh my god" as an expression of surprise. I know IABU with this as it even irritates me! I blame too much Americanised TV. However the more I try to change it the dafter all the other options seem to sound.

So AIBU to ask you all to please help me by sharing what word you most commonly use as an expression of surprise?

I'd also be very interested in your "child friendly" curse words. At the moment I'm saying "oh fiddlesticks" but feel slightly daft.

'for the love of Melanie Chisholm'

that is brilliant. I'm going to start using that!

Blimey
For goodness sake
Piddle

Jesus, Mary and JOSEPH!!

Flippin' eck

Gordon Bennett

Oh, my giddy aunt.

For flip's sake.

Horlicks. Not one I use but a friend did. It sounds amazingly sweary when you hiss it or yell it!

Piddlesticks is also a good one.

I rather like 'Good Grief!'

Bolleaux!

I'm actually quite relieved that so many of you naturally want to say Shit, Fuck, Bugger, Fucking Hell, Bloody, Wanker, etc. They were the ones I used pre-DC - I swore a lot.

When I was at work I got away with fecking, fecking hell, bloody hell and wanker, as other staff used the same (you wouldn't think I worked in local authority at that time would you?).

Having a parrot of a DS has made it really hard. The "fiddlesticks" came from school nursery because he said fucking hell in class - I haven't got over the embarrassment.

DS also picked up on some random saying bastard in the street a few days ago and keeps saying that!

I favour the substitutions that cater for explosive swearing :)
Fudge
Poo
Bottoms
Twit

You twitting twit is useful when driving.

Oh F...or crying out loud!
Crikey!
Cookadoodle!
Holy Hannah! (Whoever she is)
Oh Cr...akers and cheese!

(But now she's older I find myself swearing again...and DD complained about a boy in her class the other day "Mum, he is such a DICK!" - we've had to have a "chat")

Crikey, jings, oochah, doof/us, ya radge . Loving everyone's pseudo swearies (some of which I think are proper swearies).

Common in my family: 'Hyssop', after the plant. No idea why, but you can inject a fair bit of venom into it!

Jings, crivens, michty me and my very favourite - Help ma boab!
We're big fans of the Broons

We use Oh my stars, Oh my days, and Cheese and Sprinkles! (Thanks, Rio!)

Crumbs
Blimey oh Riley
What the?
For goodness sakes
Goodness
Oh me oh my
Weirdo beirdo

Dd2 (3) does an 'Oh my heck'. I'm a fan of 'shine a light'.

Yowsers!
I had a mouth like a sailor until I had children. I just don't swear now, no replacements.
Sometimes I do a SIOB.

Zippety-blimey-doodah

Holy pantaloons

Gordon Bennet

What the flip-flops?

I hadn't realised DS was picking up on my bad words until one Christmas he sang, "Santa Claus is coming to town FUCK'S SAKE!"

Pook.

It's cheese on toast in our house !

I'm loving 'judas priest' !!

Lots of our family object to 'God' etc even, OMG so it's tricky !

Yampye inka! (Pronounced 'yam pie ink ah' - means, he has given me a cow)
Mama we! (Pronounced 'maa maa way' - means, your mother)

Legacy of VSO in Rwanda!

genie mac!
oh my goodness me!
I have to admit that our DD managed to learn some particular flowery curse expressions in three languages when we forgot ourselves. One of the memorable moments was, when I bumped my knee against our staircase handrail, managed to say "uuuhhh. ...." with gritted teeth which she matter-of-factly completed with "shit" when she was about 2. Taught me to be slightly more careful with my words.

'For Petes sake!' hasnt made the list yet and gets used quite a bit round here.

Lowl is being given a cow a good or a bad thing and what are the implications about the giver?