Midwife with cold hands.

[MouldyPeach]

I had dd3 at home on Tuesday, I had a sudden and unassisted birth so by time the midwives got there she was already over an hour old.
When it came time to do the newborn checks the hands of the midwife who did it were *freezing. dd was screeching and I took her off the mw and asked that she warned her hands up. My dp also pointed out that her hands were white compared to the rest of her arms which she got quite huffy about.

Was I U to have stopped the examination and ask her to warm her hands? AIBU to expect mw's and others doing skin-touching examinations to not have hands to rival Elsa fromFrozen??

www.independent.co.uk/voices/terrifyingly-according-to-the-world-health-organisation-definition-the-uk-no-longer-has-a-nhs-a6923126.html

YANBU, babies need calm warm surroundings, not touching with cold hands. I would have been upset by this lack of care and probably complained to her line manager if she got funny about it.

I have had 3 C sections with two of them they cut into me and cut my Babies meaning they needed stitches.

That was discomfort for a baby after birth, not cold hands! YABU.

You're joking, right Constance?!

You have a presumably healthy, living newborn to cuddle.

You are both being very very silly.

Gosh. I would've guessed this was your first baby had you not said she was your third.

Look OP, when you think back on this you will likely realise how silly you were. We've all been there, doing/saying/thinking daft things when we've got a new baby, hormones make you like that. I know it's difficult to see that sometimes because you're caught up in the new baby bubble (understandable), so while YABU, I'm not going to beat you up about it!

I do think you need to have a word with your DH about being rude though. You were both out of line, but he doesn't have the hormone excuse!

YANBU

If the mw suffers from cold hands she should have warmed them (and probably washed them anyway in hot water) before handling your baby.

Congratulations!

I think/hope Constance is taking the piss.

I have Raynaunds and have chronically cold hands and feet. It is extremely painful - particularly when changing temperatures

This must have been uncomfortable for the newborn in this picture. I think it's worth remembering how fortunate we are.

Your husband was being u. He should have made the tea first then she'd have had warm hands

YABU but you've just given birth, so being U is fine. Console yourself with your snuggly newborn and don't give it any more headspace. :)

As it was a sudden, unassisted birth, I expect the mw was anxious to do the checks asap, rather than taking time to warm her hands. How very U of her to want to check your DD is OK

And f*ck me, your DP is rude. How dare he comment on her appearance?

I am shocked that you have the energy to post this.

You have just have just had a beautiful baby & you choose to focus on the negative.

she couldn't help it.

Count your blessings, would be my advice.

hands to rival Elsa from Frozen

Wasn't she given special gloves to stop her freezing things? Obviously the MW forgot hers.

MrsJonah no problem! It's horrible isn't it, I've got it in my feet too.

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Warm up your hands.
The end 😂.

OP yabvu and your husband was being a dickhead

Baby number three? How have you coped with heel prick tests and blood tests? For their own benefit babies can't always be left alone. Cold hands are just nothing in the grand scheme of things!

YANBU. I think it's bad practice and bad manners to touch anyone with cold hands. The MW should know that she would get a negative reaction if she touched a new born with her cold hands. The MW should wash her hands in hot water or worn gloves. I'm not surprised the OP complained. Poor baby.

Good for you OP. People are weird. I'm on DC4 and still don't think it's unreasonable to expect a midwife to give her hands a rub together for 30 secs before touching my baby! I don't like being touched by cold hands so why would a baby who's been cosied up nice and warm in a womb for 9 months?!

jeez, midwifery services are stretched to breakng point yet you think an appropriate use of a sister's time would be dealing with a complaint that the midwife's hands were cold

People are weird? You mean that the vast majority of this thread are weird and the minorities opinion is normal?

last to the person who would have complained, not the op

I thought having cold hands was a job requirement for midwives. I've never met one who had warm hands

As a nurse with chronically cold hands, I have sympathy with the midwife. I can run myself ragged for eight hours, continually washing my hands, in a very warm environment, but my hands remain cold. They may not feel cold to me, but to others they are. I try and warn people, but if I'm in a hurry that's the last thing on my mind.
My take on this is, be grateful that you had an experienced midwife to check your baby, her hands may not have been warm, but I doubt she intended to upset you or your baby. (But maybe she left your house more upset than she entered, health care professionals are human too )