To be scared

[TheoriginalLEM]

OK, so people will say, but we have been on "severe" terror threat for ages, yawn yawn yawn. But I AM SCARED. Sitting here shaking :(

I don't even live in a major city - i do live near london but i wont go anymore. :(

I want to go to the national gallery, i want to go the science museum, i want to go to the theatre - but im too scared.

Something is afoot for it to be on the news and radio and adverts for what to do if you are caught in an attack. Jerermy smugface vine discussing whether we should stand and fight or run?

I bought children into this?? really???

I must admit that I have a slight apprehension about the residential my 10 yr old is going on to London in a months time but she is still going. I was also apprehensive going into london on remembrance sunday, still went. You can't live your life afraid of things which haven't happened yet x

I hear you but I'm trying my hardest to push it to the back of my mind.

I do often say I feel guilty for bringing my children into this world. The news is just a constant stream of horrific events all over the world, I cannot imagine what those families are going through in Syria and all the other areas of conflict.

I just pray that they don't ever get caught up in this terror.

I pinch myself and still go into London, I don't eagerly take the kids with me though, like I used to.

You can't let them control your moves. But I definitely know exactly how you feel.

Speaking for myself (live in London, work in London, know someone who was killed in the 7/7 attacks, and have a toddler), it has not affected or changed the way I live day to day, and I would suggest that you try to carry on as usual.

If you can't, see your GP about your anxiety. I know I probably sound a bit brutal, but what else are you going to do? Live your life in fear? That's no life. You're in more danger driving your car or crossing the road.

You might want to see your gp if you have anxiety. Sitting shaking isn't normal or healthy. I live in Central London and haven't really felt anything different. You could be in danger anywhere, but you can't just stop living waiting for something to happen.

beard - i do suffer from anxiety and its generally under control.

i wonder if i lived and worked in London id actually be more stoic but as it is i don't HAVE to go there so i don't. that makes me sad and angry. im not sure who im angry with though.

I haven't seen the warnings I don't watch the TV news and I haven't seen anything in papers or online. Do you have a link? I'm imagining a When the wind blows style shelter at the mo!

There has always been death and destruction, but we see more of it now.

Terrorists want to create fear. As do many politicians. Fear can easily turn to hate and conflict. (I'm not suggesting you hate anyone.)

It sounds like you suffer from severe anxiety are you getting any help? I don't mean that in a patronising way, but it is quite extreme to be shaking over this.

Sorry, cross-post. I am ridiculously slow at typing

Please see your GP-if you are sitting at home shaking in fear, then your anxiety is very high.

Have a break from the news for a while.

I think you should plan a trip to London-a quick in and out to visit one place. Work out all transport etc, then build up to doing it in a few weeks or months. It seems to have become a focus for anxious feelings and you are fixating on not being able to go to London, but actually you can.

And bear in mind that, as my father always used to say, the likelihood of some kind of terrorist act in the UK may be very high, but the likelihood of you being caught up in it is very low. Even if you are David Cameron.

It's more dangerous to do almost everything else you do with the children every day though, by a huge factor, if yo're talking about actual risk. Your chances of getting caught up in a terrorist event on the one day you choose to go to London are somewhere around the same as getting struck by lightning while having a car accident, right outside your house. Right after winning the powerball.

You need to keep telling yourself that it is your anxiety, not actual risk. And it doesn't really sound like you have it under control, so I suggest another GP visit might be in order. The best way to keep your children safe is to looka fter yourself.

this is light hearted but pretty much sums up how I feel:

www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/youre-not-even-in-our-top-five-worries-londoners-tell-extremists-20151207104505

yes, post Paris things were tense, but life goes on.

Yes, I saw the news yesterday and felt very concerned. For those who haven't seen;

www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2016/mar/07/isis-planning-enormous-and-spectacular-attacks-uk-counter-terrorism-chief-warns

A quick Google search showed me that they make announcements indicating we are at almost imminent risk every six months or so. We're definitely at risk, but then, when haven't we been?

The reality is that any of us could die at any time. I know someone who has just died of a brain hemorrhage in the prime of her life, so unfair and sad. It puts life into perspective though - live it and enjoy every moment while you can

To be a bit worried is one thing, to be sitting at home shaking is another. I don't think your anxiety is as under control as you think, and you should go back to your GP.

LEM - what are your normal coping strategies when your anxiety gets this bad?

I think, because I was a teenager when the IRA were targeting the mainland (and was in Harrods two days before the bomb went off there) that I am not unduly worried. I was also meant to be in London a couple of days after the barracks bombing.

I do think if your anxiety is preventing you from living normally then some counselling may help. We can all sit here and talk about how it's unlikely to ever affect you directly but I think your fears are irrationally deep seated and not something the average internet stranger can fix.

A quick Google search showed me that they make announcements indicating we are at almost imminent risk every six months or so. We're definitely at risk, but then, when haven't we been?

I always look for the hidden story when such announcements are made. How is that Snooper's Charter progressing - low public confidence, big waste of money, just the right time to release a reminder to the public....

Lem, what sort of anxiety drugs are you on? I notice you post quite frequently about being overly anxious.

i genuinely think my anxiety is justified. i have coped with this my switching off the radio and cleaning the bedroom.

why is this news today?

You think that because you are inside it. It really really is not justified though, not in the slightest. I don't want to be harsh, but you need to understand that you are acting irrationally and it isn't a normal reaction.

You might as well hide under your bed because of the chances of a meteorite hitting your house, its about as likely and as logical. You need to speak to someone about your extreme anxiety. Best of luck.

OP this level of anxiety isn't justified. How often is your anxiety medication looked at?

It's nothing that hasn't been said umpteen times before. And the source isn't exactly likely to say 'everything's cool, just relax' - neither do newspapers or news programmes thrive on cheerful kitten news.

It's horrible that there's any sort of risk but for most people going about their business in London, the Daily Mash link upthread has it about right.

LEM, a quick Google tells me that, from data from the US and the UK, your chances of being killed in a terror-related attack at 1 in 20 million.

Link
So in contrast, you are 14 times more likely to die in your bathtub than in a terrorist attack, 11 times more likely to die by slipping during a shower, 16 times by lightning, 517 times more likely to be murdered (there is on average one murder every 60 seconds worldwide), 991 times by self-injury, 500 times in a car accident (3,000 people die every day in road accidents worldwide), 450 times by falling, 118 times by accidental drowning, 41 times in natural disasters (earthquake, flood etc.), 25 times by choking on food, 13 times by a dog bite, 4 times by falling off a ladder, 1.8 million times by a heart disease, 1860 times by electrocution, 93 times by bee sting, and 3 times more likely to die by a snake bite or food poisoning

You've got more chance of becoming an astronaut than you have of being killed in a terror attack.

I can understand that some people are more anxious than others but shaking with fear at a small risk you're not actually incurring seems to me to be at the pretty extreme end of the anxiety spectrum.

I totally get where you are coming from, I too say it's your anxiety. When I feel like this I close down mn and all outside stuff. Do an anti anxiety guided meditation. If you are shaking at home I think that is what you should do now.

This level of anxiety is not normal, you really need help with it. Sat in your house shaking is ridiculous. Sorry but it is.

FWIW my DCs live in London (young adults) and I don't and that worries me but they just carry on with their lives as normal which is what you and others should be doing.

Please don't pass this irrational anxiety onto your DC because you will be doing them a disservice.

Can I point out the obvious - that OP isn't choosing to feel like this?