DH thinks I have missed out this Mothers Day he is being unreasonable

[Oldsu]

DS normally takes me out on Mothers Day, this year my DS become a Dad himself and of course he wanted to spend the day with my DIL on HER first Mothers Day, I understand this, he popped round this morning with a Mum card and a Granny card from baby grandson and some glass that I collect and then of course went back to his new family.

I told DH that if he was that bothered about me not being taken out he could take me out himself (which he did) but keeps banging on about DS not being with me on 'my special day'.

I have tried to explain that it's the way it should be now DS is a Dad himself but DH has been banging on about it all night.

Its actually spoiled my day

You rock. That is all.

You sound like an AMAZING Mum. Your DH IBU!

Yanbu. Is your Dh missing his son a bit and harking back to how things were in the past? He should shut up about it now though!

I hope I have the same sense of perspective in the future as you do.

Also, what is the big deal about going out? Your son thought about you and made a very nice gesture-that's terrific!

You've got it Wight.
Did you tell dh that it was his grumpiness that spoiled your day, not your ds.

Mon all the mums of sons!

And congratulations granny

You sound lovely, and so does your son.

That is all.

Yanbu at all! How lovely you are Congratulations on your grandchild

I really hope your dil appreciates the fact she has a sane sensible mil - god imagine if your husband was the one with the vagina!?

DH is an unreasonable grumpy old coot and I told him so. Besides I am getting baby grandson for the day on Wednesday that's better then any Mothers day pressie.

Both you and your DS sound wonderful!

On my first Mothers Day, when DP told his mother he was spending the day with me and our DD, she had a major hissy fit and DP's sister told him to get his priorities straight and that his mother should always come first!

Tell your DH you are happy to wait for Grandmothers day - ok, it's a tacky USA invention, but it might shut him up!
Congrats - so wonderful your ds was able to pop round at all.
Wait until it's Father's day, and repay his attitude!

I think your DH misses your son. He hasn't expressed it in a healthy way at all so I'm not suggesting pandering but understanding. Especially if DS (who sounds great btw) is your eldest/only child.

I think there is a definite need for an official hierarchy of whose Mothers Day is the priority.

Certainly with a new baby and children the youngest mother needs to take priority. When children grow up the priority should revert to the older mother because they may not be around for much longer.

Toxic mothers are of course exempt from the second rule.

Sounds to me your DS got the day right. Lovely DM, Lovely DS....shame about DH

I guess DH has just realised his role has now changed and is projecting that pain on you.

Your husband is being very unfair. Sounds like your son got it right.

My brother has his own children now so he sees my mum the day before Mothers Day with the grandchildren, then the 2 of them will go out for lunch next week. Mothers Day is spent letting his girls spoil their mum.

Yabvu. How frustrating it is for your DiL to have such a reasonable mil.

DS is our only child and I guess DH thinks that now I am not going to have a special day anymore now that DS has his own family DH was the youngest of 6 so his old mum had a houseful on Mothers day, I think he is sad that I wont have that.

But he is STILL a grumpy old coot, next year it may be different and we will all go out, but GS is not even a month old its such a special time for the new family first Mothers day will be a treasured memory for them

Oh my goodness not even a month old. Well done your son for managing to come out with a nice present and card and not be half asleep at home forgetting that it's Mother's Day. I think you and your son got it right and hopefully in the future you can all celebrate together x

I think your DH misses your son. He hasn't expressed it in a healthy way at all so I'm not suggesting pandering but understanding. Especially if DS (who sounds great btw) is your eldest/only child.

I agree with this. You sound completely lovely, your ds sounds completely lovely, your little grandson sounds cute, so I'm guessing your DH must be a lovely person too and I would try to understand where he is coming from.

My DSs both have young families. They see me the day before with cards and flowers. I think it is appropriate that they and their children spoil my DILs on Mothering Sunday.
Both DILs are excellent mothers and in different ways work hard to make their families happy ones.
DH took me to a Rugby match in the afternoon, a great time and our team won!

You sound great op, that's exactly the kind of attitude I plan to have if my ds has a child! In our family we nominate a day - yesterday was my mil's Mother's Day, Saturday was mine, and my mum's will be the next time she visits us. That way everybody gets a special day and nobody misses out. My mil is going to be doing some more babysitting for us in a few weeks time while dh and I attend a course so I'd have been happy not having a Mother's Day and just celebrate mil cause she rocks, but it's nice to have a treat day even if the date isn't the same as most other people's. If your dh is still hot and bothered about it, would he be happy with a similar arrangement to ours next year?

You sound fab, so does your DS.
(You have named your grandson in your OP though, you want might to report to MNHQ to get it removed)

tiddlyipom its ok about the name I posted on the day I became a Granny and MNHQ complimented me on his name

I really wish you were my MIL - you sound fantastic and you've obviously raised your DS to have exactly the right attitude, love that he didn't leave out/forget you but he should definitely be with his DW on her first Mother's Day. Your DH is BVU, would be tempted to cut him a tiny bit of slack and wait for him to give his head a wobble if he's not usually like this - if he is I'd be steaming with him.