Dh thinks we have spent too much money on dd's birthday

[justalittlelemondrizzle]

Just that really. £130 for a party with 12 friends £120 on pressies and extras. I don't think thats extravagant at all. Infact it is the cheapest weve ever done. Am I living in a dream world?!

It's fine if you can afford it

That would be about what we spend. I suppose it depends whether you can comfortably afford it?

Too much money is more than you can afford, or are comfortable with.

I'm guessing he left all the party organising and present buying to you, and now has an opinion after its all done? Tell him to get involved at the start and then he can have an opinion on it.

In fairness he will contribute the majority due to me working part time. But yes he left me to it but was told prices/numbers before hand and he was happy with it. It's just one of those expensive months.

We tend to do £40 on a party and £25 on gifts. Usually club together with other relatives to get bigger stuff. That's our budget but everyone's different

I've never managed to get a party to come in under £100 . . . Do share how you do it spandex!

A party for £40 spandex? How? Where? I feel ripped off

Tbh compared to what we spent on ds this year sounds fine.

I booked the party ages ago, sent the invitations and forgot to factor that cost in when I got his presents. We don't normally do this though.

I think it's sounds about right.

if you have the space at home and a few friends I can see how a party for £40 may be possible.

I have found that parties are usually about £150 minimum if at a venue.

that sounds ok, parties are expensive, presents are expensive

That's very similar to what we spend. Fine if you can afford it.

I don't think its a lot. Seems very reasonable to me.

He was happy with it and now it's been spent, he's decided that he's not. Miserable git! The alleged "over-spend" could be deducted from his birthday gifts to even it up.

Parties come to £120 to £250 here dependant upon activity and number of guests. We usually spend about £150 on presents.

He can't really moan if you asked in advance re the amounts that he would be paying.

How old is your dd?

If she's 3 - yeah, he's probably right. If she's 12, you are.

I expect SPandex does a party at home OP. That's how she does it for 40 pounds. A venue is always more expensive.

What you've spent is normal for a party for 12 at a venue. Probably cost more in London.

We spent way too much last year. The whole class was invited plus younger siblings (common in the parties we go to, and we would have been unusual to not invite younger siblings) and it was £12.95 per child. With me doing party bags etc the whole thing was near £500. About 32 children. I had never done a party before and was just going on what other parents had done. It was a big soft play centre, so nothing too fancy.

Never again. This year I want to take DS on a family day out to Legoland or similar. I simply cannot afford paying that each year! (DS hated it anyway.)

without wishing to turn this into a game of Swankers, I'm spending approx £125 on a party for dd1 next week, plus a £250 present.

we're not fabulously wealthy (both public sector workers earning sub 40% tax threshold) but clearly not skint either - no-one's going to go without or get into debt over it.

I am constantly conflicted over stuff like this. The middle-class circles I mix in lead me to believe that I should give her an Improving Book and some colouring pencils otherwise she'll be spoiled, but my working class roots say fuck that - spend while you've got it .

I've done 3 parties at home (I hate it, WAY too stressful!) and still can't get it to come in at £40 by the time I've paid for activities, food and party bags x

Oops! Accidental x! Forgive me!

... party bags and cake that was.

anyway.... my secret shameful telly watching is Real Housewives of New York/New Jersey/Orange county etc. If you want to see some truly insanely expensive children's parties- that will make you feel better about your spend!

Sounds reasonable if you are paying a venue such as a soft play centre or bowling alley to do the party.

Maybe too much if you are doing it yourself at home. I could never be arsed to do parties at home though. Just didn't want the hassle or the mess and nor did DH, so you have to suck up the cost of an external venue.

When he gets involved in the organising then his opinion may carry more weight.

NoTime me neither. But I have noticed that some parents go way less for the entertainment and decorations.

I think some people buy the very cheapest food (which is fine) and don't do decorations. Entertainment is balloons, dancing and games like musical statues.

I could do a party like that for LESS than 40 pounds.

Depends on time of year too - easier to get away with fewer decorations etc in the summer if they can be outside. December birthday parties, when it's been too dark/wet to go outside for 3 months and all the kids are demonic hyped up with pre-Christmas excitement, are the 9th circle of hell.

Bit bad to make you feel bad about about it, after the event. The martin lewis budgeting tool, made me look at it differently, if you want to give 3 kids £50 birthday gift, you need to save £12.50 per month. Add to that the £40 a month to save for christmas, to give a fairly modest £140 per child of 3, plus few other bits, and you start to think do i really want to pay more than that on gifts? That's £52.50 every month of the year, to cover fairly modest gifts for 3 kids each year!