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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Shoes off house rule

840 replies

BettyBi0 · 02/03/2016 16:11

So we have a shoes off rule in our house. Mainly because of the grubby London streets and dog poo everywhere locally plus a floor licking toddler.

Every time my parents visit I have to ask them to take their shoes off. EVERY Fing TIME! They act like its such a massive imposition.

AIBU or would you just shut up and put up?

OP posts:
987flowers · 02/03/2016 18:51

I disagree about knowing about dog poo! I know where dog poo has been on the pavement and pavements aren't cleaned so there will be residue along with mud and general dirt! Yes you know if you stand in a great big lump but it sometimes gets spread out and it isn't so obvious! Maybe we just have dirty pavements here. Perhaps if all dog owners became responsible it wouldn't be so bad but that's a whole new thread!

nokidshere · 02/03/2016 18:57

We have a really good doormat! I never wear shoes or socks or slippers bug it doesn't bother me if others do. I have owned my own home for over 30 years, have lived both rurally and in town and not a single person has ever walked dog poo into my house!

One of my friends takes her shoes off when she comes here but has really sweaty feet which you can see when she's walks across my current wood floor - yuk - I'd rather she kept her shoes on

Scoopmuckdizzy · 02/03/2016 19:01

Do the people who won't take their shoes off in other peoples homes wear shoes in their own home? I take my shoes off in the hallway out of habit and training DC to do the same. My flooring is not precious and I don't have a problem with others leaving shoes on but it is just more comfortable for me and I always want know where DCs shoes are!

SauvignonBlanche · 02/03/2016 19:02

My guests can do what they want with their shoes, as I value my guest's comfort over my carpet.

I have been advised by my physio not to walk barefoot for 3 months, if was unexpectedly asked to remove my shoes, I'd have to go home.

I don't tend to mix with such people though.

Smartname · 02/03/2016 19:03

Shoes off - urge! People's feet are yuck, mine especially! I feel like an idiot without shoes on and get v cold feet +chilblains. In summer I'm generally sock less and not keen to reveal my fungal nails! Agree it's a bit hyacinth!

We live in an old, cold house with stone floors and dogs. I have had people insisting on taking their shoes off even though I'm in boots! I think it's weird and I judge them!

Natsku · 02/03/2016 19:08

I have indoor crocs people can wear if they can't be barefoot (not that its ever come up), I wear them when I'm doing the mopping so I don't get wet socks.

Nobodies shoes would be clean enough where I live - half the year there's snow/slush/mud/gravel everywhere you walk, right up to my doorstep, and the rest of the year there's tiny gravel/sand up to my doorstep so shoes will always get something on them. I have a good doormat outside and another one inside but that's just to stop people bringing in the worst of the snow/mud to the porch - no matter how hard you wipe your feet you won't get them clean.

breezydoesit · 02/03/2016 19:14

I always take my shoes off when I go into people's homes. I thought it was just good manners.

Solina · 02/03/2016 19:16

Im from a country where it would be rude to not take your shoes off when visiting. So my house is always shoes off and because I invite very few people over ever I have no issues with people respecting this!

Also, my place is always warm if there are visitors (and every other time because I hate cold) so not even a cold feet excuse can be used.

Momamum · 02/03/2016 19:17

Aanyone else turned up at a house wearing trousers which are leg length + shoe heel length and then be forced asked to remove their shoes, resulting in either looking like an Orphan Annie with their dead mum's clothes on their legs, or tripping along, literally, holding up their too-long trousers like a maiden at a dance?

No? Just me, then...

So, wtf isn't the shoes/no shoes rule made clear when the invitation is issued?

I've no issue with a no shoes rule, but ffs tell me so that I c an dress appropriately Angry

Balletgirlmum · 02/03/2016 19:20

I'm only 5' 4 so have to use shoes for clothes to look remotely normal.

thewocketinyourpocket · 02/03/2016 19:28

After living in Asia for five years, keeping shoes on in the house just seems dirty and impolite. My mom makes a fuss when I go home and take my shoes off at the door....

If your guests can't respect the rules of your house, for something as simple as no shoes, then they forfeit the right to visit your house. Wink

usual · 02/03/2016 19:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Seeyounearertime · 02/03/2016 19:34

Do the people who won't take their shoes off in other peoples homes wear shoes in their own home?

I wear my shoes from when i dress in the morning until i go to bed at night. They're perfectly comfortable and keep my feet warm.

TeenAndTween · 02/03/2016 19:34

So do you lot all make plumbers etc take their shoes off?
And if they have to keep going back to their vans?

We make children take shoes off as they can't be trusted to wipe their feet well and consistently. Everyone else it's up to them.

Zariyah · 02/03/2016 19:37

Is it really considered normal to attend a dinner party and wear socks with a posh frock? Even the anal people's homes I've been to don't insist on shoes off if they're throwing a party.

RortyCrankle · 02/03/2016 19:41

I read a thread on here ages ago - the woman insisting on visitors removing their shoes offered them a choice of artesanal slippers. Are you doing that OP?

Personally I think it's all a bit anal - I don't care if people remove their shoes or not when they come to my house, I'm just pleased to see them.

Balletgirlmum · 02/03/2016 19:49

I work for a plumbing firm.

If made to take their shoes off they would return to the yard & you'd get an aborted call out fee.

Shoes are part of their PPE & we could be sued if they trod on something or dropped something on their foot causing an injury.

Sparklingbrook · 02/03/2016 19:50

I hope that's in the small print of the quote Ballet. Grin

Balletgirlmum · 02/03/2016 19:52

It would be the equivalent of being made to remove their hard hat on a building site.

Most of the lads west steel toe caps, not sure if the domestic servicing lads do though.

Sparklingbrook · 02/03/2016 19:54

Well I can understand not wanting a hot water tank on your foot.

honeyroar · 02/03/2016 19:58

I can't bear shoes off households. I have a few friends that do, and of course I go shoeless, but I'm always cold there.

At our house we wipe our feet. We don't wear walking boots or wellies (we live very rurally and have dogs and horses) in the house, so tend to wear slippers inside, however normal shoes, such as those that people visit us in, are perfectly welcome. I'd never have a carpet so light you couldn't wear shoes.

Natsku · 02/03/2016 19:59

Workmen definitely shouldn't be made to take their shoes off as its part of their protective equipment, but those blue bootsies can be put over them (I don't bother with that though)

People who don't want to take their shoes off - what would you do if you were in Japan and you visited someone's house? Would you refuse to take your shoes off? Or a Japanese persons home in the UK? (Or a Finn's for that matter, or indeed many other northern European countries)

Even at my DD's daycare we have to take shoes off (or put on the blue booties), any parent that refused to take their shoes off would probably not be allowed back.

TheFormidableMrsC · 02/03/2016 20:01

I have had contractors in my house who have put little elasticated covers over their shoes. Lovely idea but always make me chuckle because they look ridiculous Smile

lookingforafriend · 02/03/2016 20:07

I have always had the same house rule in every home that we have lived in for the last 25 years....

If visitors or relatives are offended then don't visit....

wallywobbles · 02/03/2016 20:14

I ask people to leave shoes on. We have dogs. Outside shoes are wellies here.