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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Baby gender reveal party!

162 replies

Flashbangandgone · 02/03/2016 14:31

Firstly, it should be 'sex' not 'gender', but that's not my issue.

Maybe I've lived in a bubble the past few years, but I've only just realized these existed. For those of ignorant ones like me, this is where a sonographer doesn't share the sex of the unborn child with the parents, but sends it off to a baker, who then makes a cake either with blue or pink sponge, covered with icing. It may get sent to a balloon supplier too who blows up a load of pink or blue balloons depending on the result.

So, the parents or parent, hosts a party at which guests are invited to share in the drama of finding out the baby-to-be's sex.... The cake is cut into and the assembled throng whoop and cheer as the sex is revealed, with many congratulations given.... The couple would then let loose the balloons (hitherto encased in some kind of sack to keep the suspense), gazing open mouthed in wonder as the news of their foetus' sex is carried off to the world on the four winds, providing an Instagram-tastic opportunity.....

AIBU to think this is kind of party is the height of a toe-curling, self-indulgent pretention that I hope never catches on (though I believe it already has the in the States).... or am I just being a grumpy, fun-hating grouch.

OP posts:
squoosh · 02/03/2016 15:23

'My cousin (English and worryingly doesn't even live in the US) had one for these.'

And so it begins.

It will start with the odd gender reveal party here and there, but ten years from now the old reliable English disdain for such showy ostentation will have eroded so much that you won't even be able to get the bus to work without witnessing at least two flash mob proposals.

RudeElf · 02/03/2016 15:25

I'm almost afraid to know the answer but are guests expected to bring gifts to these parties?

icanteven · 02/03/2016 15:28

It's American. I was stunned and thrilled when DH's cousin did it (thrilled because of the extra opportunity to tease DH about his Republican cousins - they're the gift that keeps on giving). It's the absolute depths of self-indulgence, but you know, if people are into it and their families are too, then no harm done. If you're invited to such a thing, you can just say no.

thebestfurchinchilla · 02/03/2016 15:31

Sounds awful .What's the big deal anyway? It's a 50/50 thing, boy or girl, hardly a big reveal. I would swerve it, we don't need any more American hype.

BarbaraofSeville · 02/03/2016 15:32

Surely NHS Sonographers in the UK aren't going along with this?

In the great barrel of 'reasons to throw a party' it appears that the bottom is being well and truly scraped here.

KERALA1 · 02/03/2016 15:32

I don't think it will catch on. Baby showers haven't really (IME anyway). But hope they do any excuse for a party - the naffer the better. Wouldn't travel for one would have to be in the neighbourhood.

Still trying to persuade my friends to have a wedding dress wearing party but no one is up for it.

Runningupthathill82 · 02/03/2016 15:34

An acquaintance of mine had a "gender reveal" party.
She made family and friends assemble in her living room, whereupon she walked in to a drumroll and lifted her top to reveal her bump... which she'd painted pink with makeup and written "it's a girl" on.

Thankfully I wasn't at said event, though I have seen the video, which was posted on Facebook.

cozietoesie · 02/03/2016 15:37

I suspect they are, RudeElf - but remember that they might be compensatory. Wink

nellyflora · 02/03/2016 15:37

Hideous as are baby showers. The arrogance of it all is awful. Maybe I'm an old grump who has seen a little too much of life but I only celebrate births and baby sex when safely in its mothers arms!!
I do not attend baby showers so certainly would not go near a gender reveal 😖

diddl · 02/03/2016 15:42

Blimey Op, you must have been in a bubble, even I've heard of these!

So by that criteria, they must have "caught on"!

MadHattersWineParty · 02/03/2016 15:42

Well, the one I attended, innocently thinking it was just a family Christmas dinner, was like a drive-by gender reveal.

Caused a massive strop all day from my cousin that it didn't go the way she'd imagined, with us reading these little pale blue scraps of paper and hugging and congratulating her.

Lovely that she was having a baby, I have to say I couldn't care less what sex it was going to be.

RudeElf · 02/03/2016 15:43

Christ! So thats baby announcement present (based on a thread here yesterday!), sex reveal present, baby shower present and finally baby arrival present! Shock

Please dont let this shit catch on! All my friends are child bearing age.

cozietoesie · 02/03/2016 15:47

Cultivate a reputation as a curmudgeon, then. Smile

mcoy · 02/03/2016 15:49

I really think giving out the sex of the baby prior to birth for anything other than medical reasons should be banned

I believe ultrasounds are safe enough but don't think the NHS resources should have any time taken up to let people know what colour cake to bake or clothes to buy, or that unborn babies should undergo any medical tests for that purpose

Gender reveal parties are icky

RudeElf · 02/03/2016 15:54

Think i might already have one cozie Grin

PiperChapstick · 02/03/2016 15:56

mcoy I know people who actually think the 20 week scan is to reveal the sex of the baby Shock never mind the part about checking the health of it ey Hmm

I had a colleague whose sonographer didn't do gender reveals, they're not obliged and for good reason I think!

We had a surprise and it was wonderful!

ChickyChickyParmParm · 02/03/2016 15:59

The sonographers I had were so surly I am laughing at the idea of asking them to write to the baker and the balloon maker.

Never been asked to one of these events, don't know anyone who has had one. Surely they'll eventually die a death, like Tupperware parties and the Dodo.

kirinm · 02/03/2016 16:01

Does anyone else other than the mum and dad give a shit whether you're having a girl or boy? Really?! I'd lose the invitation to that party.

mcoy · 02/03/2016 16:02

I think in reality iv heard that you ask the sonographer to write it on a piece of paper you put inside a sealed envelope and you bring the paper and envelope along yourself... Even in the US.

Still utterly useless and a waste of time.

BillSykesDog · 02/03/2016 16:03

If I was a baker or a balloon person there would be no colour but simple bold writing saying 'You are cunts'

PiperChapstick · 02/03/2016 16:04

If I was a baker or a balloon person there would be no colour but simple bold writing saying 'You are cunts'

Grin
mcoy · 02/03/2016 16:07

If I was a baker or a balloon person there would be no colour but simple bold writing saying 'You are cunts'

That's one DM sad face article that would be worth reading actually

GobiasIndustries · 02/03/2016 16:08

Mcoy the person who did my scan wrote it down and then went off in search for an envelope to put it in so we definitely wouldn't see. She said she'd never heard of this before but thought it was a lovely idea and wished us all the best.

Granted she had scanned me a few times before and had to deliver bad news so she might have just been glad to finally have something good to say and wanted to be nice. For all I know she might have gone back to the break room and called us all kinds!

Original poster
Flashbangandgone · 02/03/2016 16:13

Christ! So thats baby announcement present (based on a thread here yesterday!), sex reveal present, baby shower present and finally baby arrival present!

If only that were everything... You forgot naming day/christening present....

OP posts:
nevertakeyouriphoneinthebath · 02/03/2016 16:17

I imagine a green cake is for those right-on loons who want to name a baby Jupiter and it up in a totally gender neutral way without anyone including grandparents knowing its actual sex until it grows tits or an adams apple.