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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Does anyone just want a day off work and a day off your kids?

135 replies

BloodyHell33 · 01/03/2016 21:43

I work term times. Great, it works amazingly round the children.

I love my job and I love my kids but on Monday I found myself willing an illness to come so I had a genuine excuse to have a day off work and the kids be at school. As if I would enjoy it if I were ill .

Even tonight I'm busting for a day off.

My DH would happily take the kids off my hands for a few hours on a weekend. But I want a whole day. Selfish, I know!

DH works full time too, self employed so gets 4 days holiday a year (unpaid, when we go to Butlins which isn't exactly relaxing!)

So he too, deserves a day off no work no kids.

No family round us to give us this pleasure either. Even then, if they did, I'd like it totally alone and not even with DH. . I know, meany.

I just want a DAY OFF!!

OP posts:

spiderlight · 01/03/2016 22:40

I'm self-employed. Iwork from home. I've just checked my emails and seen one from tomorrow's client. I literally bounced up and down in my chair because I thought he was cancelling and I could have the day off, even though it meant I wouldn't get paid and/or would have to shoehorn him in at the weekend instead, and I was gutted when it actually said 'The files are ready - shall I send them now?' Le sigh.

Imstickingwiththisone · 01/03/2016 22:41

Are your dc nearing the age they'll go on a school residential trip OP? Start planning how you will fill your time

ClashCityRocker · 01/03/2016 22:42

Any chance you could pack the kids off to pgl or similar for a short break during the hols? They'll have a whale of a time and you can have a break too.

Writerwannabe83 · 01/03/2016 22:50

Twice a month I arrange my shifts so that I'm off on a day that DS is at the childminder's and it's heavenly.

It's the same as when I'm on Annusl leave, I still send DS to his CM twice a week and I love the luxury.

I'm currently on A/L and DS went to the CM yesterday (for 10 hours) and he will be going on Thursday too.

It feels weird being at home without him but bloody hell the peace and quiet is wonderful!!!!

FastWindow · 01/03/2016 22:52

My dsis only works termtime(so gets no hol allowance), and the first time we ditched the kids during half-term to do a full spa day 9-6 , we were a bit guiltridden.

However , I am pleased to report that the spa was so good and restorative that we have repeated the experiment many times.

Also le sigh (but a good one)

PuntasticUsername · 01/03/2016 22:53

I work from home one day a week. I do the am and pm school runs and in between, have five lovely hours to myself. Sometimes I literally do just work at home (generally sitting in bed with a grab bag of Maltesers and a huge mug of tea, with a break for Homes Under The Hammer of course), sometimes I go and work in a coffee shop (with a toasted teacake and a huge cappuccino), sometimes I go to eg a National Trust property cafe (with some delicious cake and a huge cup of tea). It's an absolutely frigging awesome way to work.

MrsDeVere · 01/03/2016 22:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheChimpParadox · 01/03/2016 22:59

I work full time but booked a day off on an occasion when DH was away , both DC at school - secondary school so no school run and even keep the booking for dog to go to Doggy Day Care - I felt really guilty about the dog but it was bliss to go back to bed once DCs left the house. Dog gets collected from house so didn't even have to get up for that !

FastWindow · 01/03/2016 23:03

Mrs DV, have you tried balancing one arm straight up whilst lying on the floor? It's tremendously satisfying when you get it just so and it stays there by itself.

You have to turn to one side a bit.

like a bucket list, but less momentous.

FastWindow · 01/03/2016 23:10

If this thread makes one point, it is that mothers get absolutely no time completely alone. And we take it as part of the job description - you're a mum now, how dare you want not to be, even for an hour. Yet the dads (generalising, i know, but still) many carry on 90% as pre-dc.

Ok back to the less serious stuffs!! :)

Confession: Paw Patrol gives me about an hour a day almost completely to myself.

LBOCS2 · 01/03/2016 23:18

YADNBU.

I'm on maternity leave at the moment but we've kept DD at nursery for 2 days a week. As the baby isn't due until mid-April I've got two whole days a week to potter. Before going on mat leave I worked a very stressful, extremely full time job, plus sharing the whole 'owning a toddler and running a house' stress with DH. It's bloody amazing.

Today I made brownies, met DH for lunch and tidied up the living room. Tomorrow I've got a 3hr hair appointment booked.

imwithspud · 01/03/2016 23:19

I agree Fast it doesn't matter whether you work or not. Time alone as a mum is so hard to come by. Dp has been to the cinema, to a rugby World Cup game, he plays golf or goes to the driving range once or twice a month, and I admit I do feel a little envious. Like he gets to carry on as normal whilst I'm 'stuck' at home with dd's. My dc's are still young so I don't know for sure. But I like to think it gets easier as they get older and more self sufficient. I long for the day when I can lie in of a weekend and my dd's can sort themselves out, and maybe even have a lie in themselves. Got many years until that longing becomes a reality though. Can't wait though.

YY to Paw Patrol. My eldest dd is also allowed 1.5hours of tablet time a day. Very occasionally I take the timer off it and let her go nuts, but I don't want to let that become a regular thing as the good parent in me knows that it's not good for her to sit around tabletting all day every day.

babybythesea · 01/03/2016 23:21

Oh yes. I've had one day in the house by myself in seven years. I used to spend loads of time alone and loved it. Wish I'd appreciated it more. I get the odd hour but always use it to do a job that can't be done so easily with a toddler in tow.
God I would love a day to read, drink tea - and not have to answer any random questions, fix anyone else's food or drink which they need two seconds after I've sat down, worry about what everyone else is going to eat tonight, watch what I wanted without negotiating first, help someone find something they swear they put away.... Would be be heaven.

FastWindow · 01/03/2016 23:28

Praise be for this thread.

While we are tenaciously on the subject, i have made it my life goal to make my ds NOT be one of those men who 'cant find' something because its under something else
Lift. It. Up. Look. Underneath. Oh look! your shoe

WutheringFrights · 01/03/2016 23:29

Ha! OP this is exactly what I was planning to do, use my last two days of my annual leave to spend time at home pottering and just sorting stuff out that is impossible to do when the DC are here.
DH suggested I could take days off over Easter and we could go and visit his mum...but I had very important plans for those two days!

Since I made this marvellous life changing decision I have been off work with pneumonia for nearly a month.

I am thoroughly bored of my own company, the house has been Kondo'd (see Kondo thread) to within an inch of it's life (in my more lucid moments) and I really miss work.

I am never ever going to wish for me time ever again!

happydollplease · 01/03/2016 23:31

I've already booked a week off work in September when my dd starts full time so I can have a week of peace

DiscoGlitter · 01/03/2016 23:32

I'm a SAHM with school age children. It's something you dream of, and I still love if I'm honest.
Love being able to please myself during school hours.
Although bear in mind it's not all great, as you do sometimes wish you were back out there in the working world, the land of the living, and talking to actual people outside of family and school gates.
You have to work hard to stop your brain from turning to blah in my opinion.

FastWindow · 01/03/2016 23:34

Ah but ill time isn't me time. You can't go shopping, (if you could) as you'll be spotted and sacked.

No, this is more basic. Like going back to (hushed tones) pre-dc

Disclaimer on behalf all pps- wouldnt change a damn thing

ComeonSummer1 · 01/03/2016 23:34

What a great thread.

Am I the bloody cm you are all sending your kids yo whole you lazy arse around the house?

Don't blame you.

However I am giving up. Stopping and my kids at college and gone!

It will be me and the dog all day chilling and can't bloody wait.

FastWindow · 01/03/2016 23:37

Disco there should be some scheme where we can swap for a bit. How are you at office work?

MrsDeVere · 01/03/2016 23:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cornishglos · 01/03/2016 23:38

This thread is making me feel so much better about my impending surgery. I have a baby and a toddler and no childcare. I spend all day every say with them and I love it but. .. last week a friend took the toddler for a few hours and it was just me and baby for the first time ever, in nearly 4 months since baby arrived. It was amazing! I've worked so hard to get her on the bottle in time for my op, which I was dreading. But at least my mum's coming to help, and might take both kids out the house, leaving me all on my own for the first time in years!

ginandmoregin · 01/03/2016 23:39

I'm a single mum and I work term time only. I usually book the kids in for some kind of holiday activity at least once every school holiday/half term. Usually costs about £30 for both of them but it is SO worth it for a day off.

Go on...Easter's coming up, you know how much your kids would really really love a day of gymnastics/football/multisports/forest school etc etc

FastWindow · 01/03/2016 23:49

Ok laydeez, let's fix a date. Call it something cheesy like MeDay or FuckitWineforLunchDay.

Easter hols soon, no?

HerRoyalNotness · 01/03/2016 23:59

I'd like to go to sleep for 24hrs, have the universe reset itself, wake up and something fucking good happen to our family.

I'm so sick of all the shit and drudge and nothing seeming to improve. And I know lots have it much worse than us, but I'm getting very anxious now.

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