To find this woman rude?

[BathshebaDarkstone]

In the school playground this morning, DS brought some toys with him to play with before school, the usual group of boys came to play. One mother told me I shouldn't let him share with other DC, and told her DS to put a toy down. I told him it was OK, he could play with it. Later, my DS ran off to do something else, leaving the other boys to play with his toys. The same woman said "He's gone, put the toys in the bag" to me. I replied "No, his friends are playing with them." I really wanted to say "ODFOD" but I realise that this isn't appropriate in a school playground. So my question's in the title.

Fair enough Bath but do you think she may have said the 'put them in the bag' later, in the manner she did, because you undermined her with her own son? She told him not to do something and you told him it was ok, knowing that she was concerned? Next time tell the parent it's ok and let them decide.

I'm sure she didn't mean to undermine her. I've had parents say 'no, you can't play with this' because they think I'll mind or DS will mind and, if I say it's OK, it's because I want to reassure them that it is OK for their DS to play with them and WW3 is not going to break out! If there are other reasons, it isn't clear but I expect it's up to the parent to clarify that or no one knows where anyone is.

OP is getting a hard time on this thread and so many posters missing the point.

It's her choice whether she is willing to let her child bring a few things for before school...she's the one who waits while he puts them in the bag, she's the one who has to schlep around Sainsbobs with them. No school rule saying she can't, no particular reason not to.

If it's a headache for another mother for whatever reason due to her child, then tough shit, or at a pinch she could speak to the OP about that particular issue so at least the OP knows there is one and she can choose to do something about it.

It terms of telling her to put the away, she can fuck off. It's rude. Like I say, if there is something else going on, she should just say.

And nothing unusual about a barely 4 and a half year old having a blankie/teddy/transitional. In our school enrolment papers they specifically ask you if your child has such an item. He'll grow out of it. Probably half or more of the class have one. Apart from being one of the youngest, he's no different to anybody else in his class by the sounds of it.

gandalf exactly, and I didn't want her DS to be miserable because he was the only one not allowed to play with them.

Actually, I wish I'd thought to say, "Did you mean to be so rude?"

Thanks Tatty you're lovely. When I read your post out to DH and got to she can fuck off he roared with laughter!

OK zzzzz I'll take that on board. Those of you worried about me being flamed, I know what to expect in AIBU!