Parents should pick up after their kids who make mess in restaurants

[LifeofI]

Do you think so?

I was in a restaurant today with my friend and her two year old, her child always eats about 4 chips then the rest she just throws the food around. When we were leaving a lady made a comment "aren't you going to clean that up" my friend didn't hear but i did and said no and she just tutted.

When i got home me and my partner had a discussion and he thinks the parents should clean up after their child as he has work as a waiter and said it is annoying but i'm on the fence about it. We have a very young baby who hasn't started eating solids so we are not at that stage.

What do you think?

I used to work in restaurants and a couple of them wouldn't let customers clean up because it looks bad on the restaurant that paying customers aren't tended to properly.

as a waitress it was part of my job and I expected kids to drop food and make a mess. I wouldn't begrudge a child. Its the adults that were grubby that were the worst.

Ones who would dump the rubbish contents of their pockets on the plates for us to clear away or the ones who never flushed the loos or left used sanpro there or who would sweep bits of food from the table onto the floor. Just leave it on the table!

the one thing I hated was the ones who blew their noses on napkins and stuck them on the plates. Eugh! That was horrid compared to picking up bits of food a baby had chewed.

We clean up food, its not a big deal just leave a decent tip for your waitress if your child makes a mess. Actually, leave a good tip regardless ;)

I never thought staff would get annoyed by my stacking up of plates.

I can see why though if they have a special way of doing it and I end up causing them more work. It just seems wrong to leave it all there for them.

Yes clean up its very disrespectful not to Would your friend let her child fling food in your home and not at least help to clean up or not clean up in her own home and she clearly had no thought for the other people using the area or staff I would just remind her gently next time

I always clean up after the girls. Including crawling on my hands and knees with a napkin under the table. Often waiting staff have told me it's easier for them to do if with a brush and dustpan but I refuse to let someone else pick up after my kids.

I don't think anybody is saying that after they eat out, they get down on their hands and knees and start sweeping out crumbs from the floor with their bare hands, then get up and start piling up all the crockery and cutlery and wiping down the tables again with their bare hands. Because yes, that would be weird and a bit worrying to observe that in a restaurant. The OP is about a baby throwing chips on the floor. I would just automatically pick it up.

But as I said, teach the dc not to throw food before you take them out to eat. Problem solved.

My head is spinning at the fact that there are staff on here saying "no need" and people saying "I've been asked not to but insist" - and yet still it's a mn orthodoxy that you have to clean your table in a cafe if your child was with you.

Can I just ask - if you go to a cafe with another adult and have tea and a scone and no one visibly spills anything, do you think that they staff don't clean the table? Or sweeps the floor? Or eventually mops?

And the relationship between cafes and homes - it's completely wrong. You don't pay your friend if she gives your child a sandwich. You don't expect to be thrown out if you occupy the same table for too long without buying anything. You don't get to show up there and ask her to make anything you fancy (off a menu). IT'S NOT THE SAME THING

I have worked as waiting staff, however, even before I did, I knew it was skanky as fuck to leave food mess all over the place.

Honestly, how can anyone reach adulthood and not realise how shit that is?

Always make an effort to pick up food from the floor and make the table okay to clear.
Would never leave crayons all over the table, for example.
Hugely disrespectful to do otherwise.

*"I leave the table as I would if I was eating at someone I knew,"

this is blowing my mind*

er did you read on immediately following that comment where I said I do go overboard? Mind blowing though eh.
I'll carry on disrespecting busy, underpaid, undervalued wait staff by trying to help where I can though....

The only person I know who does not clean up after her kid in an eating place is my SIL and she is the biggest entitled bitch I have ever met.
It is bloody rude. They always say you can judge people with how they act in an eating place and it's true. Maybe think on that next time

Always clean up afterwards - and I stack the plates etc back onto the tray.

I waitressed as a student, and the ones who left their tables like middens were talked about in not too polite terms.

kawliga

"I don't think anybody is saying that after they eat out, they get down on their hands and knees and start sweeping out crumbs from the floor with their bare hands, then get up and start piling up all the crockery and cutlery and wiping down the tables again with their bare hands."

I think they are... but with not just bare hands but wipes

"Because yes, that would be weird and a bit worrying to observe that in a restaurant. "

and kind of rude.

Can I just check whether I am completely misreading this and whether we're talking scenario a, scenario b, or something completely different?

SET UP

(Child-friendly cafe, with service, serving lunch, at tables, with real cutlery for grown ups and real crockery)

Group includes a two year old who eats about half a cheese roll and drops a big lump of it on the floor. there are some crumbs on the table and on the floor and a minor sticky circle from a cup of milk. Adults order tea and scones, and are mostly tidy with the odd escaping raisin, but the teapot doesn't pour brilliantly so there are a few stray drops of tea too.

SCENARIO A

Carer of two year old asks for the bill, picks up the big lump of roll and puts it on the used plate, pays, tips, leaves

SCENARIO B

Carer of two year old gets under the table, brings a small plate with her, and picks up the big lump of roll plus any smaller crumbs she can physically pick up. She emerges, wipes the table, uses the wipe to sweep all crumbs into one plate. She piles up all the plates and crockery with the cutlery on the top. She wipes everything again and gets down on the floor one final time to see if she can make a better job of the crumbs under the table with a wipe.

Pays, tips, leaves.

In my opinion Scenario B is really odd and quite rude and it really feels like this is what most of you on this thread think should be done. Am I misreading this?

I'm on the fence here. I try my best to clear up after my ( very messy ) two when in a restaurant. Though I don't really mind when it comes to cleaning up after little ones when working in my own restaurant. Kids make mess, it's not the end of the world.

Plates and cups back on tray - carry tray. How hard is that?

I was a waitress in my student days and once remember clearing a six seater table where the top was covered in food, empty pots of baby food, loads of grubby baby wipes, loads of dropped food underfoot. Buggers didn't tip either!

Went out to dinner with a good friends family while their son was doing baby led weaning. He made a mess but my friend cleared up as much of the mess from the table and the floor as she could, apologised to the waitress and left a tip. That's what you should have done in my opinion!

Yes, clean up! I have two children and they've always been encouraged to tidy up after themselves in restaurants/cafes.
Fast food type places (eg Mcdonalds) put everything on the tray and dispose of in the bin and not leave everything out for the cleaners like some messy feckers do
Restaurants, if bits everywhere, at least put it on the plate.
If your child is toddler/high chair age, YOU pick up if they're prone to throwing stuff.

DS is a food thrower (not sure how you teach them not to at baby stage? ).

I generally make a bit of an effort to clean up, but more because I don't want to send the message that I think it is OK and don't give a shit about the mess and the waiting staff, rather than because I think it is my responsibility to do so. So I pick up anything big that ended up on the floor and give the table a quick wipe with a napkin, but I am still anticipating that staff will need to clean up properly.

In busy cafeterias etc where I don't think the high chairs are likely be cleaned between visitors I will give it a wipe down properly though.

Luckily DD has never been one to fling food, but if anything did drop on the floor of course I'd pick it up. I tend to pile any leftovers / used serviette small onto one plate and stack bits together a bit.

Just walking away and leaving a right mess is so rude!

neither scenario a or b here. Yes I think you are misreading it.

I get under the table pick up all the big bits (chips, half a potato, carrot sticks, peas etc), tends to take about 15-30 seconds. Put them on a plate. Don't do anything to the plates. Leave the table unless it is very dirty and then just baby wipe the really dirty bit, takes about 10 seconds including getting the wipe out. Leave crumbs.

Can I have votes on whether we should all be doing scenario a or scenario b please?

I've always tided up after dds
Both dds now young adults, say they can't leave a table untidy now when out with their friends, they find themselves clearing up and at least making table easy for staff to clear. They say its their conscience and they blame me 😆 .. it's manners and respect.

I stack plates to keep them out of grabbing range of ds who has a habit of picking up crumbs and sprinkling them on the floor.