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AIBU?

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Original poster

Playdate DCs haven't been picked up. Should I drop them off?

1023 replies

Recordmirror · 21/02/2016 20:33

So a mum from my DCs school asked me to have her two DCs today as her two are the same age/in the same class as my two youngest.
The DCs have been here a couple of times before but usually I arrange this with their dad and he picks them up.
But he is away on business and so their mum asked me to take them today as a favour whilst she is in work.

I've had them since 9 this morning. She was supposed to pick them up at 6:30. I called her at 7 and 7:30 and 8 and 8:15 but she's not replying. I have text her a number of times and nothing.

My DCs should be in bed. Her eldest isn't bothered but her youngest is getting upset saying that she should be in bed. I haven't told them that their mum should have picked them up by now.

Should I go round to theirs? I don't want to worry the DCs if their mum isn't there when we get there. But I would like to know where she is. So would I be unreasonable to go round there?

OP posts:
FirstWeTakeManhattan · 22/02/2016 00:12

OP, I think you'd have every reason to call work in the morning and take the day off. Good luck.

PaulAnkaTheDog · 22/02/2016 00:14

Way to show yourself as a dick millions!

PoppieD · 22/02/2016 00:15

Op think whatever outcome you will be emotionally and physically exhausted tomorrow agree with first about taking tomorrow off.

custardismyhamster · 22/02/2016 00:15

Everyone with DCs please learn from this, anyone you leave the kids with give them a piece of paper with your mobile number, landline, partners number, a couple of emergency contacts, and any urgent medical info. Basically the stuff school/childminder/brownies etc would need to take. And get a number for the person they're staying with, written on a piece of paper with 'in case of emergency my children are with this person' and keep it in your handbag, ideally in your purse with your driving license. Just better to be a bit over cautious and never need it.

MillionToOneChances · 22/02/2016 00:17

Ah. You mean a nanny or babysitter, not a childminder weeblueberry, unless you're outside the UK where names mean different things. At least if they were in their own home your other DC are less likely to have been upset.

weeblueberry · 22/02/2016 00:19

No I'm in the uk. Look I don't want to make the thread about this but she is our childminder who happened to be at our house instead that day for a number of reasons...

Just to clarify...

Mrsmorton · 22/02/2016 00:20

Sad hope you have some news soon op.

MillionToOneChances · 22/02/2016 00:21

A childminder only operates from their own home and would almost always have a landline for emergencies. We are strictly regulated hence the need to call social services after a reasonable period with no contact. I'd probably wait more than an hour though, it would take 30 minutes before I'd start phoning every emergency contact number I had on every form.

FuzzyOwl · 22/02/2016 00:22

Really hope everything is ok.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 22/02/2016 00:23

Custard, that's actually a good idea. It's easy for phone to run out of battery and then no way of accessing phone numbers you might need.

MillionToOneChances · 22/02/2016 00:23

Sorry, cross-post. You're right, that isn't what this should be about. Not collecting kids on time is serious though, as we can see from OP's experience. Once 4 hours have passed you start regretting not raising the alarm for the first two, hence cautious policies for professionals.

AcrossthePond55 · 22/02/2016 00:26

Since the police have been informed and OP has contacted the people she can, if it were me I'd try to get a little sleep. If this isn't resolved overnight she's going to have two (probably) upset children on her hands tomorrow morning.

There are so many possibilities, hopefully there were just some crossed wires somewhere and the mother hasn't contacted OP because she thinks someone else has her children or she misdialed and left a voicemail on a wrong number thinking she had the OP.

Becca1818 · 22/02/2016 00:26

Hoping everything turns out ok.

wigglebum84 · 22/02/2016 00:27

How awful, I hope she's found safe and well.

Thenightswatch · 22/02/2016 00:28

Hope everything is ok op Thanks

Patrickstumpsvoice · 22/02/2016 00:30

I agree with pp. Get as much rest as you can as you dont know what situation you'll have to deal with tomorrow

You've done brilliantly Flowers

SuperFlyHigh · 22/02/2016 00:32

Hope everything is ok. This happened years ago to my mum with a friend of hers turned out her friend had gone to hospital but it was due to DV. We were all about 7-9 at time and we weren't supposed to know real reason why apart from her DC. The father was taken into custody but they were separated anyway and she had a restraining order I think out on him or was going to get one taken out. They'd obviously arranged to meet to try to get back together but it went wrong. Luckily her sister came and collected the kids the next day and they stayed with her until the mother was better. I just remember waiting and my poor friends (the kids) were just numb and pale waiting for her until we knew what happened. Could not settle properly for ages that night or next day but it was a weekend I think or holiday time (summer) didn't want to talk much etc. Sad

custardismyhamster · 22/02/2016 00:34

Ghoul I wouldn't have thought about it. I actually don't have DCs yet but regularly look after my best friend's children-I do know where she works but I don't have her mum's number or her partner's, though I do have them both on Facebook. I know the kids well enough to know there's no major medical things, but I don't know if they're allergic to anything or whatever else.

I hope there's a good, but not too serious reason why this DC's mum hasn't picked up and I hope if she's in hospital she is a little more relaxed knowing her children are safe with the OP

LaurieFairyCake · 22/02/2016 00:39

Definitely go to bed and hope the kids don't get you up in the night

AndNowItsSeven · 22/02/2016 00:39

Hope you can get some sleep and mum makes contact.

NanaNina · 22/02/2016 00:49

How worrying - it's almost 1.00 a.m. now - I actually hope she's gone off drinking or partying rather than something bad has happened.

ANewIdentitytoJazzItUpABit · 22/02/2016 00:49

Stay focused OP. You are doing all you can. Flowers

TendonQueen · 22/02/2016 00:54

Yes, get sleep. The kids will probably be up early being somewhere unfamiliar.

LittleMissUpset · 22/02/2016 01:04

Just read the thread now, assuming by the end she would have shown up, how very worrying for you all Flowers

You've done all you can, and I hope you can get some rest.

I'm wondering if the husband is on his way back if he knows she is missing? Maybe in his panic he forgot to ring and is currently on a plane. Do you know the name of the company he works for? They should be able to get hold of him somehow?

Thinking of you all Flowers

Iwasbornin1993 · 22/02/2016 01:09

Assumed there would be some sort of news by the end of the thread. Hope there is a rational explanation that means the DC's DM is okay.

Thinking of you, OP Thanks

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