to have asked for a cup of tea and slice of toast?

[listsandbudgets]

DD was admitted to hospital overnight yesterday. Thankfully discharged today though still not clear what's wrong with her and she's still clearly ill.

I picked her up from after school club at 4.30 and it became quickly apparent she was very unwell. I called dp who came and took us to A&E where we arrived at 5.30. DP then returned home with 3 year old ds. DD was seen quite quickly and after various long processes we made it to the ward at 11.45pm by which time I'd not had food or drink since a cup of tea and a cheese sandwich at 1pm.

Once dd was settled around 12.15am and it became obvious she wanted me to stay with her which i agreed to do I went to the nurse station and asked if there was anywhere I could get a slice of toast and cup of tea as I'd not had food or drink by that point for over 11 hours.

I was told that as I wasn't a patient there was nothing they could do and I'd need to wait until the cafe opened at 7am. They did give me a cup of water though.

AIBU to think they could at least have risen to a cup of tea. I know I wasn't their patient but its not like I was asking for a feast - I didn't even mind that much about the toast I jsut wanted something warm :(

To be fair at 3.30am a nurse came to do obs on DD and I asked her for a cup of tea and she bought one saying she was surprised I'd not been offered one hours ago

I'm afraid I havent read the full thread, but this all brought back a horrid memory. When I was about 8 or 9 my mother was admitted to hospital while we were on a long trip, she was completely out of it for at least 4 hours and was only woken briefly once to be fed by the staff. I was completely ignored, not offered any food or water, or even spoken to, and it was only when I wandered out crying and terrified and desperate for the toilet that someone in a nearby bed took pity on me and showed me where the toilet was. Maybe this is why I cant go anywhere without several snacks in my bag!

If there arent facilities for parents, then I just really hope that no children are ever in the same situation I was!

Aposey, what a horrible memory. You must have been so frightened.

Thanks ILostIt, I wish I hadnt remembered it now!

Whenever I have been in hospital with my kids, i usually find a vending machine at night and nip to the cafe and bring a sandwich back during the day. Usually there is a tea/coffee station in the day time.

Unfortunately many kids hospital experiences. V unusual.to be offered anything.
At yorkhill. In Glasgow parents had to go to main foyer to use loo.

many hospital cafe's have vending machines for out of hours with more than just a choccy bar - so sandwiches etc as staff need food too. Personally when DD was in for a few days I went home once she went to sleep (around 10) - slept, ate , packed up food and things to do and returned for 7am. But I was lucky - didn't live that far DD 8 and v sensible about whole thing - not particularly poorly just IV antiBs so felt OK just bored.

It all sounds a bit can't be arsed by person you spoke to as nurse stations from my experience often have biscuits and chocs coming out of their ears so they could have spared you a rich tea if nothing else.

I also know (from having lived even closer at one point) there was a one stop late shop about a 6 min walk down the road and round the corner from there a chippie/Chinese/Pizza etc would be suprised if there wasn't near the hospital either although that would mean being comfortable to walk around in the middle of the night on own whilst child sleeping etc

I stayed on a children's ward overnight with my son - they told me from the off that he and I were free to help ourselves from the kitchen - there were all sorts of snacks and sandwiches and drinks; and I was offered breakfast in the morning.

I know we all want to be with our poorly kids if we can but its also important to look after yourselves in these situations so you should try and think about these things so such situations don't occur - ie once child stabilised leaving them with a nurse or member of staff and let them know you are going to the loo/find a cuppa and back soon etc and going to get supplies to keep you going. I know its not always possible but often it is.

Just remember not so long ago children as young as 4 and 5 if it was suspected they had tb or polio were sent to hospitals away from home and isolated for long periods. Heads shaved to stop nits etc. My Mum was sent away aged 7 for nearly 12 months for TB treatment and she was sent to North Wales from Stockport. My poor Grandmother could only visit Sunday and spent all day getting there and home for 1 hour with three of her children - lucky for my Mum she had 2 big sisters with her although the eldest was extremely poorly and ended up having half a lung removed. I know we think differently now but I am just trying to say it won't traumatise your child to be left for short periods counted in minutes rather than hours or days whilst you keep yourself fit to look after them in hospital.

They could of and should of made you a cup of tea at least.

Of course yanbu. I've been in the same position and it is rubbish. As for the person upthread who claims to have eaten nothing for three days and that it wouldn't have occurred to them to ask for food, that is either extremely, dangerously foolish or total bullshit a huuge exaggeration. You can't look after a child on no food for three days. There is self-abnegation for your child and there is ridiculous martyrdom, and it does nobody any favours to pretend that parents looking after sick kids in hospital can magically survive without any sustenance.

That is odd! 5wk old DS was admitted last night. I was shown the tea room immediately and they offered to get me a sandwich at 1am this morning. Bless em. This morning they came round with breakfast and asked me what I wanted for lunch and dinner too! Perhaps I just got DS order automatically as he is not on solids yet.

Rb68 that is true for age 3+. But if you have a 1-2yo who can easily climb out of the big cots, there is no way on earth you can safely leave them without supervision, even assuming they don't get totally hysterical in your absence. Even going to the loo needs to coincide with a nurse in the room.

Our local children's hospital do not provide anything. But as I'm in quiet often they know me and sometimes sneak an extra bit of toast for me.

I've never been to a hospital in London that's not had a 24 hour cafe
St Thomas in London had everything

When my son was in with a lung infection overnight, there were a couple there with their daughter who I think was a regular. There was an older sibling too, who was also in regularly. They both suffered badly with asthma. The couple were there in shifts. When they did a change over at one point they bought me a cheese sandwich too. I was incredibly grateful as I was absolutely starving by that point. Off the off chance someone on here who lives near Northampton gave a woman with a toddler a cheese sandwich, thanks very much

I worked in the hospital. They have sandwiches in the fridge 24hrs (incase a patient gets hungry during the night) and also when you are in labour they always offer you t&t as soon as you have delivered baby no matter what time it is.

Yadnbu op.

Sounds to me like you got unlucky and got stuck with lazy staff.

well what if you couldn't go to hospital with child - children at home, in another ward yourself etc or no partner and so on - they would have to deal with it - seriously if you need food go and get it - tell the nursing staff what you are doing and have them watch the child - the rest of the time you are there you are saving them a job. What would happen if you were diabetic?? You would prioritise it - people need to realise they have to look after themselves to look after their children - as to the woman who says she went three days no food she is plain ridiculous. The child clearly slept at some point and she would have still needed the loo etc

I was lucky that when my dd has been in overnight it's been in hospital with parents' room with drinks and snacks.

I was in a Paris A&E once with DH and there was nothing available - no vending machines, no shops, and if there was a cafe no one would tell me about it (and my French is reasonable). We were there from lunchtime until about midnight before he was admitted, and I ended up buying biscuits from the Gare du Nord shops on the way back to the hotel for dinner - and for the next few days because of when the visiting hours were. There was something a bit about being on holiday in France and not getting any of the good food!

In hospital after having DD, I had great trouble convincing the staff I didn't want tea. I don't much like it, and certainly didn't want any when feeling very sick from the pethidine. The mw had just told me that tea and toast would make me feel better, so I took one bite of dry toast and promptly threw up everything I'd eaten in the last 12 hours. Poor DH had to clean me up.

Our hospital has cafe for most of day (breakfast until about 20.00), parents are welcome to make their own tea/coffee/instant hot chocolate (provided) so long as they have it in covered container. There's a microwave if parents bring food in or get a friend to. Outside cafe times there are vending machines (chocolate/crisps/sandwiches). Breastfeeding mums get meals at same time as kids are served.

OP you may have asked in the middle of a busy shift - I hope the nurse wasn't rude but maybe she was trying to say you can't get "proper" food in the middle of the night. They may not even have had any bread to make you toast until the kitchens came up with supplies

I've had to stay in hospital with my DS overnight numerous times in A&E/ emergency children's observation ward & I've always been given tea/ a sandwich &/or biscuits without asking. I think you were really unlucky

Northampton hospital has a parents room from what I can remember with sofas, a fridge to bring bits in, microwave kettle and toaster with bread, jams and tea/coffee!
Must admit I thought this was the norm as only hospital I have been to! They should at least offer toast and water I think.